Bad Boys

The Raven is Hoarse that Croaks the Fatal Entrance of... C-C?

"We're home!" My brother called as he entered the house. Elegantly, I walked down the stairs, perpetually displaying my ladylike grace.

The same could not be said for my sister, Dymondina Celeste-Cosettphina Theondrina-Sallibeth. She traipsed into the hallway, her piercings and black hair all the more ghastly in real life, dragging her large suitcase behind her. What sort of self-respecting woman carries her own luggage in, when there are servants for that?

"Oh C-C you don't have to do that," Jaxxon sighed. "You're not peasantry." Well her attire clearly begs to differ, I thought.

"C-C?" Dymondina and I said in confusion, although she talked in this weirdish accent.

"Yeah," my brother explained. "Like a nickname. Short for Celeste-Cosettphina. It's also that dude from the band you played to me that I liked. Black Veil Pride or something."

Oh my, what had Dymondina done to my brother in the short hour that they had been together in the drive from our private airport? Suddenly, my sister's short stay seemed a lot more unpleasant than I had anticipated. 

"Anyways, you're staying in the 7th room on the east wing of the house. It's on the right side of the hallway." I said icily, regretting giving her one of the best rooms in our house — Well, after me and the rest of my family, of course — and  buying her a new wardrobe. At least money's no object.

Dymondina ignored me, instead scrolling through her phone with an absent-minded glare on her face. Her phone case was all black like her soul.

I cleared my throat in a polite, ladylike manner. "I said..."

Dymondina looked at me, somewhat bored. "I heard." Jaxxon snorted.

"Oh." I said, at a loss for words for the first time in my perfect life. I wondered what Marcus would think of my unruly sister. He wouldn't give her a second thought, I bet. However, I wasn't going to go all Bezu Fache on Dymondina, I had way more class than that, and way more class than her.

"Jaxxon," Dymondina asked, her brow furrowing as she looked at something on her phone. "Is there a reason that my name, age, relationship status and current place of residence is splashed all over the internet? I opened up my safari and the first thing that popped up was an ad about learning more about me..."

I had to laugh at the stupid question she was asking. Laughing at her wasn't the most polite thing, but then again, neither was she. "You're a Vegas, honey," I said to her, laying my arm around her shoulder in an attempt to maintain the peace. "We're important, and the world knows it. By association you are too. You can start by dressing like it. Anyway, what is your relationship status?"

"Uh, single," she responded, her impassive face looking a little weirded out.

"Well, we'll have to change that." I said brusquely.

She gave Jaxxon a 'what the hell' look that he thankfully didn't return. That scum hadn't corrupted him too much. "I think my attire and romantic life are perfectly fine, thank you."

"I think C-C's a little tired out," Jaxxon said quickly, before I could shock my sister with a eloquently delivered tale of the horrors of being single. "How about I show her to her room and you go get ready for...whatever's on tonight."

I nodded silently as Jaxxon led Dymondina away to her room. To my slight approval, she didn't try to take her luggage with her.

As soon as I was back in my decadently furnished room, I began plotting about the most important aspect of Dymondina, also known as her non-existent love life. I scrolled through Instagram, looking for any eligible suitors.

After a few more hours, I had finally found three suitable boyfriends for Dymondina. Obviously she wasn't going to permanently go out with all three, but, especially for her, it would be good to have a backup in case she ruins her chances with them.

The first potential boyfriend was called AxeCider Daffodilliaz. He was 18 years old, a year older than Dymondina, and, before he dropped out, was the stereotypical bad-boy of the school. As apparently no other non-Asian martial arts existed (look I'm not racist but I kinda am), Axl was a boxer. And because of a reason too intelligent for you to understand, boxing is now a martial art. He was tall, muscular and spectacularly hot, especially when he posed shirtless in his cliche leather jacket on his cliche motorcycle.

The second guy was AntPreacher Sickle. Admittedly he was a nerd, but he was a cute one at that with his curly brown hair and blue eyes, oh and an extremely athletic but not too muscular body he maintained through studying I guess... He was in my advanced, accelerated higher extension physics class for progressive and exceptional learners so it shouldn't be too hard for me to set them up.

Finally, there was Justino Bitter, I think that was what his name was (bit bland of a name if you ask me) You might think that its a bit ambitious for me to think of setting Dymondina up with a famous singer like him, but he practices right next to me in the recording room where I record my solo album. What can I say, I'm a girl of many talents. I think he once told me I was his muse or something, but that kinda weirded me out... so yeah. I dunno, Dymondina's weird, maybe they'll be perfect for each other.

"Dymondia!" I yelled, screaming in perfect pitch from my room.

"Si," she cried back, walking to my room with her earphones blasting some shoopy music so loudly that I could even listen.

I sat her down on my bed, acting sweetly despite her mocking eyes. I placed her hand in mine as we sat cross-legged from each other.

"I bought you an entire wardrobe," I told her smiling to see her reaction.

"Che cosa?"