Chapter 3

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Luke staying at my house all night long? Great, just great. Looks like I'm not going to leave my room until tomorrow morning.

I opened the door and was very tempted to just slam it in his face before he could walk in. But something wouldn't let me. Maybe it was my brother Jake standing there. Seeing him nearly gave me a heart attack. For some odd reason I wasn't expecting him to just be waiting for the two of us.

"Ayee Jake! What's up?" Luke said making his way to him. Almost allowing me to get away and to my room, the only place that sounds good. Sitting on Tumblr and watching Netflix by myself. Honestly to me it beats going to any lame ass party. Even though Taylor would beg to differ. 

"Uhh Cass are you just going to stand there? Like what are you doing?" Jake asked waving his hands in front of my face as if he was saying "Earth to Cassie".

"Oh yea, sorry." I answered and walked to the stairs. I half listened to what they were talking about. It was mostly Jake asking Luke how the party was and the girls there and guy stuff like that. So nothing that interested me at all. 

As soon as I walked in my room I tore my dress off. I hate dresses to death, don't even get me started on this slutty skin tight one that makes it hard to breathe. Now I can put on my comfortable pjs. Even though it's cold out I still wear shorts and a t-shirt to bed. I even sleep with the fan on sometimes.

I jumped on top of my bed even though I have no intentions on going to sleep. I pulled out my laptop and typed in my password to unlock it. I decided to listen to some music on Pandora. So I put on my head phones, I hate playing my music out loud for some reason.

The first song that plays is a 'A Trophy Fathers Trophy Son' by Sleeping With Sirens. As soon as Kellin starts singing "Father, father tell me where have you been?" I automatically recognized it. This used to be the only song I listened to when my dad left us. 

He left when I was in 8th grade after him and my mom had one of their daily fights. When the fight started I never would've thought he would run away and leave us because it never got that serious, Or so my little 8th grader ears thought they heard.

My dad was an alcoholic, he drank constantly every single day.To be honest I don't think I can remember him ever going a day in my life with out drinking. It made me hate him. But I didn't want him to leave. 

'do you even miss us?
your bottles and mistress
I need to know, I need to know
why are you walking away?
was it something I did? did I make a mistake?
'cause I'm trying to deal with the pain
I don't understand this, is this how it ends?'

It's hard not to ask youself if you were the reason as to why he left. Or if you'll ever even see him again.

After he left everything in my life changed. My mom started to pick up almost everyday at work. She says it's because 'She has to work so much to support us' but in reality being home makes her depressed. But of course if you ask her if she was she wouldn't tell you. 

I think the reason Jake is so over protective to me is because he doesn't want some guy to use me or walk out on me and leave me broken; Like the way dad left mom. Jake also feels like it's his job to take care of the house and be the man of the house.

Jake was a freshmen when it happened. And it hit him hard. He lost who he was. He began hanging with the wrong crowds, getting wasted every weekend, doing drugs, partying, using girls. I'd be lying if I said he has gotten better, because he really hasn't.

At first when Jake started doing those things it bothered me. But then I realized, different people have different ways of coping with things. My mom works nonstop. He uses things to stall his thoughts about whats gone on. And I don't really open up to anyone anymore.

'is this what you call a family?'

As soon as that the last line of the song was sung a tear escaped from my eye. I quickly wiped it away and bit my lip. Something I always do to keep from crying even though it does nothing odds are.

I decided I needed a break from the computer and that I was thirsty. So I went downstairs to the kitchen.

On the island was a open pizza box.

"I was calling your name earlier to come and get a slice." Jake said walking into the kitchen along with Luke whom I ignored his eyes staring at me.

"Oh sorry I was listening to some music." I said grabbing a slice of cheese pizza.

"So what kind of music do you listen to?" Luke asked. I turned to look at him and Jake had left the kitchen I guess because it was just him and me.

"Stuff like All Time Low, Panic! At The Disco, Sleeping with Sirens etc..." I answered.

"Oh that's surprising." He hissed.

"And why is that?" I asked curious.

"I don't know. Most girls at our school like pop shit." 

"Well I don't." I felt as though this conversation was literally going no where so I left the kitchen to go back to my room.

I then went on Tumblr some more, and watched some Netflix shows like Orange Is The New Black, and my all time favorite Family Guy. Which by the way I've seen every episode multiple times.

After watching what I thought was a good amount for the day I turned my laptop off and got under the cover to go to sleep.

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*Please read for some info* Well I'm back. Sorry I've been gone something in my life happened I never would've thought. My friend died. It happened about a month ago and I didn't feel like writing. I hope you can understand. But now that I've written this I promise I will continue to write this story. And don't worry it'll get interesting just you wait. I put the song that was being talked about on the side so you can listen to it if you want. Thanks <3

-Cass

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