Aster Petals

❀ ten ❀

"Hyung wait!"

Namjoon ran to him as his determination continued to linger inside his restless heart. Persistent to convince Seokjin to stay in South Korea.

He knew from the very start that Seokjin would return to Australia. He knew from the very start, from the very moment he saw him, that he would have to return to the said country right after the funeral. It bothered him at first, but now, it bothered him immensely.

He didn't want him to leave again. He wanted him to stay. To stay with him and spend more time with him before Namjoon's clock stops ticking. Before the Asters finally take over his system, over his life.

Seokjin continues to walk away and Namjoon continues to chase him. Practically begging at this point, he blurted out, "you don't have to leave. Please stay—"

"Why do you want me to stay??" Words that sounded rather rough and harsh slipped out of Seokjin's mouth, piercing through the thin air and hitting the younger's heart. Seokjin stops and turns to Namjoon, giving him a sharp glare. Silence had taken over the atmosphere, expanding in Namjoon's head.

He could see Seokjin's face, colored with blatant emotions. He looked annoyed, stressed, and exhausted. An expression that vividly expresses how much he wanted Namjoon to shut up.

And it did silence him. An uneasy feeling that could only form inside his stomach, feeling nothing else but pain and guilt.

He wanted to say something. His mouth was left hanging with quivering lips, no words coming out. It was like something was holding him back and because of this, it gave Seokjin the wrong impression.

"Look you can't even answer me." The brunet huffed.

It was rare for Namjoon to see Seokjin like this. For him to act so frustrated towards him. It was rare for Seokjin to get mad at Namjoon, but recalling these past few days, there were quite a few times when Seokjin acted like he didn't want him around. Like he didn't want him by his side.

Namjoon could feel his heart tighten at the sudden thought. Questions flooding his head once again. What if Seokjin didn't want him to be around? What if Seokjin wasn't happy when he saw him again? What if all this time, Seokjin went to Australia just to avoid Namjoon (which was highly plausible)? What if Seokjin saw him differently? Something that he didn't expect?

What if Seokjin was just acting all nice to him just to mask the fact that he hates him? After what had happened? After the rejection? Seeing that he looked tired and stressed, it is possible that he had hit his breaking point, releasing his true emotions at him.

What if Seokjin faked his happiness just for the sake of Namjoon?

Something was growing heavily inside of him. He didn't know whether it was the boulder of a burden that had formed from weathering and erosion, or if it were the tears that continue to refill the once-empty pool.

"No hyung, i-it's not that..." Namjoon stuttered, unable to contain the nervousness that had spread throughout his body like a virus.

Seokjin looks at him with expectant eyes, crossing his arms and raising his brows. The face he had only brought Namjoon more distress than he ever wanted (not like that he wanted any anyway). A lump formed inside his throat, swallowing it then pursing his lips afterward.

"Then what is it?" Seokjin questioned sternly as if he was demanding an answer.

"I just..." Namjoon lowered his head and sheepishly scratched the back of his neck, avoiding his gaze. "I just don't want you to leave." Ever so softly, he admits. Each word pricking his faint heart which couldn't handle the emotions all at once.