Honey Drip // Danny Wagner

XVI

"Can you just tell me where we're going?" I asked Danny, the engine of his car rumbling beneath me. I had been forced to put on a blindfold--the kid was lucky I trusted him enough to do it, although at first I thought he'd been joking. 

"You have to wait," Danny replied. "We're almost there."

"This is the most boring kidnapping," I grumbled.

Danny laughed. "Would you stop?"

He was right though--I didn't have to wait much longer before the tires were slowly rolling over gravel and then I heard him put the car in park. Still blindfolded, I freed myself from the seat belt but before I could get out, Danny opened the door for me and took my hand, guiding me out of the car.

"I'm not sure what to expect," I said.

"That's the point," Danny replied. He went behind me and untied the bandana from around my eyes.

As it fell away I blinked, adjusting to the morning light. It shimmered and bounced off the water of the lake--a huge, rippling pool of dusky green in front of us. I could smell the algae from the shore and the crisp, still-cool air around us. A pair of ducks idly floated nearby, carried on by the rippling water.

"Oh my god," I said, still mesmerized by the sight but I turned to Danny. "We haven't been here in so long."

He looked pleased. "I know, it really has been a while."

"This was worth getting up early for," I said, wrapping my arms around him. He looked so beautiful in the soft morning light.

He hugged me back, squeezing me against him. "It's the best time to do it. Complete solitude."

I pulled back, letting my hands linger on Danny's shoulders as I looked out at the water again. On the other side of the lake, cottages lined the shore, the trees dark and tall around them. Everything was so quiet, so still. The soft, wet sound of a fish jumping through the surface of the water caught my attention and then everything went back to birds chirping and insects humming.

"Breakfast first," Danny announced, leaving me and returning to the car to rummage around in the backseat.

"What'd you bring?" I asked, trying to peer over his shoulder.

He held up a box of Wild Berry Pop-Tarts with a grin. "Classic, right?"

I chuckled, taking the box from him. "Classic." I went back to the front seat to grab our coffees from the cup holders, cradling the Pop-Tarts under my arm.

Danny shut the car door, slinging a blanket over his shoulder. "You lead the way, babe."

I scanned the area and my eyes landed on what had always been our usual spot--the little cove of land that jutted out into the shallows, a cozy circle of grass and a single, tall oak tree shading it.

Danny laid the blanket out, smoothing its edges, so we were able to sit ourselves right on the edge, the water lapping at the thin line of sand beneath the ledge. I sat down cross-legged and tore open the Pop-Tarts, handing one packet to Danny.

I broke off a piece and popped it into my mouth, leaning back to admire the water. "What made you wanna come here?"

"The last time we came here was about a year ago," Danny said. "But it always sort of felt like our place."

I turned to look at him. "For me too, actually." I looked back to the water with a sigh. "I missed it. I always think back to when Josh's car got stuck in the mud."

Danny laughed. "I remember Sam slipping and falling in it more vividly."

I laughed too, leaning against him, "Josh was so pissed about the interior." My laughter stopped when I turned my attention back to the lake. The fact that another entire year had gone by was unsettling--hadn't it been just yesterday when Danny and I confessed our feelings for one another inside a tent? Looking at the lake, I wished for a moment I could go back to that time, to relive all those special moments over again.

"Everything's changing," I said. Even the view confirmed that--the sun was getting higher, the color of the sky was shifting.

"What do you mean?"

"Josh and I graduated--I have to look for another job, I guess," I began, sitting up. "You guys are doing your own thing now. I already miss the times we used to have together now, so it's just gonna get harder from here on out." I felt Danny's chin on my shoulder then.

"Things will change," he said quietly. "But some things will stay the same, right?"

"Like what?"

"We'll still have those good times, even if it's less often," Danny said. "No one's going anywhere."

I had felt dread rise in my gut since we had started talking and I wasn't sure why it had been instigated--maybe it was brought on by the lake, a place we hadn't been in so long, a place that was really ours yet still felt so distant; maybe it was the stress and fear from graduating I hadn't processed yet. But all I could think of when I looked at the water was how things were changing and I was scared. Not everything was going to be the same. We weren't going to be the same people forever.

I choked back tears, the water seeming to taunt me. It was supposed to be a nice day and there I was, ruining it with unnecessary sentimentality and fear.

Danny nuzzled my neck and held me against him. "It's okay."

"I'm scared," I blurted, the tears starting to run down my cheeks.

"I know," he replied against my skin.

I knew he knew, past all the fronts I tried to put on, he still knew. But I wasn't sure he knew what I was afraid of.

I hesitated to say it as I clutched Danny's arm against my chest but, when he held me tighter, it came out: "I'm afraid of losing you."

He lifted his face from my shoulder and tilted my cheek toward him with his fingertips. "I'm not going anywhere."

"You guys will all be famous soon," I said, laughing at my own absurdity. "Then what am I gonna do?"

"Are you really worried about that? Oh my god."

I laughed more. "I think about it. You guys will be. And I'll still be here."

"I think you're more afraid of your own future," Danny said, back to resting his chin on my shoulder.

Oh god. Danny had a point and I hadn't thought of it before. Yes, I was afraid of the possibility of Greta Van Fleet making it big and leaving me behind, but I was even more afraid of having nothing for myself if that were to happen.

"Danny," I sighed, holding his arm tighter around me, comforted by his body surrounding mine. "I really love you."

Danny took my jaw in his hand and turned me to him, looking into my eyes. "I love you too," he said. "Seriously--I'm not going anywhere. None of us are."

His touch could soothe any of my worries. I rested my wrists on either side of his neck, wrapping my hands around the back of his neck. "You promise?"

Danny leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. He kept his lower lip flush with mine until I parted my lips slightly, kissing him back with matching tenderness.

"I promise."

He took me back in his arms and I turned my cheek on his shoulder, his hair tickling my skin, to look out at the water, at the ducks still bobbing; the leaves of all the trees shimmying a little in the breeze; the golden sun half-hidden behind the hazy clouds.

I had to believe Danny's words--in that moment with his arms around me, I told myself over and over that I believed it, that I believed no matter what happened, we'd always find a way back to one another. But what really mattered was that we were all together--we were all together and Danny's heart beat in sync with mine. Nothing else mattered.