void // irwin (discontinued)

// March 10, 2014 //

March 10, 2014        

Dear Courtney,

Wanna guess what my whole day was filled with? Packing. That's all I have been doing. I had eventually told my family and friends. My mum was on the verge of tears, and said that I have to move into her house again. And the boys, they all were worried about me. They kept asking why I haven't been around much, why I looked like skin and bones, and why I was moving out. Once I told them everything, they all offered to help me move, and I kindly accepted. Considering there still is a lot of stuff. 

They boys and my mum came early this morning, I told them I'd like to get everything up and out in one day. Because I don't think I can stand another minute in that house, it just all reminds me of you (not in a bad way). And we successfully did get everything out.

I had done all the kitchen and the closet stuff. It probably was a bad idea to do the closet stuff, though. I forgot that all your clothes were still there. So the second I saw your band t-shirt, I cracked, again.

But what sucks, is that when I imagined moving everything into boxes, I thought you'd still be here with me, moving our stuff into our dream house we always talked about. Not me moving out, and move into my mum's, and trying to remember what happy feels like. 

Ash x