Progress / Regress

10• Raw Realisations

Luke woke up confused, he sat up, glancing around him & soon realising he was in Calum's room. Yesterday's events just didn't seem real.
He laid back down beside a snoring Calum, and found a discarded dummy in the bed too. Along with the sound of crinkling- the nappies were real too.
He pinched himself again, he must be stuck in a daze or a nightmare. He tried to not panic, tossing and turning in the sheets, rethinking on what had taken place in the last 24 hours, it made tears form in his glassy-blue eyes, which soon turned into whimpering; immediately snatching Calum out of his slumber.
"Lukey, is everything okay?" Cal sat up, looking down at the distressed man.
"No, no no, no- it's not Cal. I don't know what's going on. This can't be real, this can't be real." Luke was almost in a full-blown panic attack.
"Woah woah, you need to breathe Luke." Cal took Luke's hands in his.
"I want this nappy off! Please, get it off- get it off!" Luke cried, pulling his hands out of Cal's grasp, clawing at the white garment taped round his waist. The loud commotion, alerted the other two men, causing them to come into the room.
"What's going on?" Ash asked with furrowed brows.
"I woke up & he was freaking out" Cal said with concern. Meanwhile, Luke ripped off his nappy, holding his head in his hands as he heavily panted.
"Luke, you need to calm. Come here" Ash allowed the younger man to crawl into his arms, despite his exposed bottom-half. Even when Luke wasn't "little", he always went to Ash for comfort.
"Ash, I don't know what going on-n" he cried, struggling to get out words.
"Shh, just close your eyes and breathe" Ash spoke softly, swaying both their bodies slightly. It was hard for Luke to comprehend what was happening, but he trusted Ash. Not as though he didn't trust Michael & Cal, but, Ash has always been the "dad" of the group.
Luke listen to Ash's instructions, focusing on the beat of his heart as he leant his ear against his chest. Ash stroked the man's hair, shushing his whines when he had bursts of restlessness.
"Wanna talk about what's going on in there?" Ash pointed at Luke's head. Luke shook his head. "I know something is wrong. I think we should get you redressed and we can go chill somewhere, how about that?" Ash suggested, scooping the man up as he stood.
"I don't want a nappy on, please Ash." Luke pleaded, beads of tears threatening to fall.
"You need to chill, let me do it and then we can discuss what's going on" Ash took control, quickly changing the boy back into a nappy & taking him into his [Ash's] room.
"Yesterday, we all said that we were going to try AgePlay in order to help you out a bit. We know you've been struggling & this could really help if you give it a go. Just think, we'll be taking all the responsibilities & all you have to worry about is behaving! We would never do something to hurt you, it may be a little embarrassing for you at first, but we're not going to judge. Okay?" Ash told Luke, sitting him on his lap. "You do want to get out of this rut, right?" Ash convinced the hesitant man.
Luke nodded, looking down at his lap.
"This is to help you, Lukey. Just let yourself go a bit. And we love you" Ash smiled, tilting Luke's head up slightly.
This was just so confusing for Luke, he didn't really have a choice. But he needed to get out of this dark place- maybe he'd stop acting & just let it come naturally.