Helpless Feeling (Frerard)

Prologue

We're friends.

'But this is wrong.'

They're trying to separate us.

'M-maybe it's for the best.'

What do they know what's best for you? I'm the only one who's ever been there for you.

'But I can't..'

Yes, you can. It's the only way.

'I don't want to..'

After everything they put you through. All the bullying, lying, taking advantage of you. You don't want to get revenge. They've done nothing for you.

'But..'

Face it. I know what's best for you. Do you want to get rid of me?

I shook my head.

Now, there's a good boy. You know what to do.

An overwhelming wave of anger coursed through me. Everything went black and the voice was the only thing I was aware of. The voice and pure rage for no reason. I could feel tightness all over, begging to be released.

"GERARD!" I blinked my eyes, my surroundings coming back into focus. The anger evaporated from my body. I saw Mikey on the floor, back pressed into a corner. His hand was out as his only defense. His eyes were wide with fear and his breathing was beyond heavy.

I felt my hand aching and looked to see a long, shiny kitchen knife grasped tightly in my hand. The handle burned my skin as I released it. I turned back to Mikey's terrified expression. I was going to...

"No..," I let out in a low, weak voice. My head shook quickly as I moved back. My eyes never left Mikey's.

"Gerard," his voice was gentler, but still cautious. He always knew how to talk to me when I blacked out, but this this was different. This was the first I've ever targeted him.

"No," I choked out, feeling tears in my eyes. When my back pressed against the kitchen wall opposite of Mikey, I let out a cry and sunk down to my knees.

"Gerard, it's okay." I dropped my head in my hands, soaking my palms with my tears. Mikey's foot steps were slow as he moved in front of me. "It's okay." He was the only one who knew what I was going through, but that didn't make this okay.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, not even sure if he could hear me. His arms wrapped around me and I could still feel him trembling from what I just put him through. I let out sob that shook my insides. "I'm so sorry."

He didn't reply and rubbed his hand up and down my back. We both let our bodies calm and our breaths slowed to an even pace.

Why did I think you could it? You're so pathetic.

I whimpered and pressed my face into Mikey's shoulder. My eyes were shut so tightly, they started hurting from the strain. I let out a shaky breath.

"Gerard," Mikey said quietly. His arms tightened around my body. "You need to get help Gee.." I could hear the hesitation in his voice. He's tried so hard to take care of me and make sure I didn't get taken away. I know I was getting to be too much for him when my black outs happened more frequently.

I needed to get better for him. Mikey deserves more from a big brother. He doesn't deserve to cut off his social life to take care of me.

We sat on the floor, holding onto each other. I'm sure he already had the place picked out. He would want to have everything figured out before telling me. Then, I wouldn't have time to fight him on it, not that I wanted to.

Maybe I'll get better fast and everything will be good again. There was a malicious chuckle echoing in the back of my head. This wasn't going to be easy, but I need to do it. For Mikey...

I'm not going anywhere.

---

A/N:

New story! Completing the trinity with a Frerard fan fic. Hope you enjoy and go check out my other stories if you're interested.