The broken wings

Chapter 2

Trigger warning: Bullying, abuse, cutting, self hate, eating disorder mentioned
School was over and I hid in my closet as my dad and mom were screaming at each other. I quietly sneaked I'm so I was hiding here so hopefully my dad doesn't find and beat me again. I was glad that Logan, Patton and Roman didn't bother to talk to me at all today after english. I heard a ding come from my crappy phone(rip off smart phone). I was surprised who would be texting me, then I remembered. A group chat of three unknown numbers.
They don't care about you
They just want to make sure you don't pull them down with you
Once the project is over they will never talk to you again
I looked at the texts

Unknown number
Hey is this Virgil? It's Patton from school!😁

Yeah, this is Virgil

Ok great! I'm going to put u in a group chat 4 the project 😁

K

Patton added Virgil to Group Project
Patton added Roman to Group Project
Patton added Logan to Group Project

I added all of the phone numbers to my phone
I simply watched as they texted each other, Patton sending pictures of cats, Logan telling Patton that we need to keep this chat for important things, Patton telling Logan that cats are important and Roman just talking about himself. It was hard not to smile, so I let myself grin.

I did start to work on homework, more like half assing it but oh well. I watched YouTube, listened to music, and happened to avoid my parents(didn't leave my room). I surprisingly fell asleep around midnight which never happens.
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I groaned when I woke up, it wasn't even to my alarm. I just naturally woke up around 4am. I laid there staring at my ceiling trying to find the strength to get out of bed
Your fucking pathetic
Just kill yourself
No one wants you here
I tried to force the thoughts out of my head, I put my headphones on and listened to music, but I could still hear them. My breathing grew ragged
Oh god I can't breathe
This it, I'm finally going to die
About fucking time
I tried to get air in, but it wasn't working. I was rocking back and forth grabbing my hair.
I tried my breathing exercises, I sunk my nails into my arm. I felt the cuts reopen, blood pooling but no pain. I need to ground myself, I grabbed my arm tighter. I put a hand in my mouth to stop the whimpers that wanted to escape. I didn't want to wake them up. I bit so hard I could taste the all to familiar metallic taste in my mouth. I sat there, panicking.

It felt like years when I finally could breathe again. I looked at the damages, my hand had a bloody bite mark. My arm was bleeding under the black sweatshirt I changed when I got home, thank god I didn't want to ruin the other one. I cleaned my arm up and started to get ready for the day. When I was dressed and ready to go I looked at my clock that had 7:00 in the bold red letters. Wow I panicked for almost 2 hours. I grabbed an apple and took a few bites before I felt sick to my stomach.
You shouldn't eat that, fat pig
You look super hideous
I only took a few bites! I'm not going to eat more!
Good
I sighed as I walked to school with all my stuff
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I just finished with my daily beating from Jason and co, arrived late and got yelled at from my first period teacher. I totally blanked out during class and is now in english. Ms. Firestone said that are seats are assigned in our groups
Great, just great
Logan was always super early to class, but I tended to be the one that got there just as the bell rang. So I had no choice and had to sit in the front.
"So what should we do for this project?" Logan asked when we were able to work on our project.
"Oh I've been brainstorming all day yesterday!" Roman spouted excitedly pulling papers out.
I noticed that Logan looked slightly surprised and pleased at what Roman was showing him.
"Yes this seems like a good idea that could work, good job Roman."
"Why thank you Logan! I was thinking that we could even use our own wings as examples!"
I froze
They can't know
Did they find out?
Shut up your just being paranoid
Your right there is no way they could have found out
I looked up to see Patton giving a glare to an oblivious Roman. I made eye contact with Patton and did I see pity?
He is only pitying you because you're pathetic
If he found out he would hate you for manipulating him
They all would
I focused back in after their whole silent discussion when Patton asked something, pity in his blue eyes,
"Virgil would you be fine with that?"
I had absolutely no clue what it was and I really didn't want to ask and seem like a bigger idiot so I just shrugged
"See he is fine with it!" Roman exclaimed giving a smile to his friends
Patton turned to me, "we were planning to go to each other's house each day to work on the protect. Today we are planning to go over to Roman's house today after school. You can come right?"
I just nodded
I hope they don't try to come over to my house
Patton seemed to give me an even bigger smile, if that's even possible
"Great! Well text you the address and where to meet after school!"
Patton looked like he was about to try and huge me, but I was saved by the bell, I ran out there to my next class.
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This time it seemed like they were everywhere. I was basically avoiding them, but I couldn't. I got the address, it was in the richest area in town basically nowhere near my house. I met up with them after school, feeling the too familiar anxiety crawling in my throat. Roman's mom picked us up, she seemed nice. She had red and pink wings, and Roman looked a lot like her. I stayed silent, I could feel the pity glances given in my direction.
When we pulled up to Roman's house I was absolutely flabbergasted. It was huge! Everything was so expensive and clean that I suddenly got super anxious that I was somehow dirtying it simply by my presence. When suddenly Patton whispered to me,"don't worry when I first came over I thought I would break something because I'm so clumsy. "
That made me feel slightly better. We went to the kitchen to work on the project, I sat down and was just looking around thinking how it was so much better than at my own home, if you could call it that. I didn't notice that Logan sat down with a computer, what pulled me out of my thoughts was Roman and Patton setting down food in front of Logan and I.
"Me and Roman got snacks!" Patton happily exclaimed.
"The correct grammar is, 'Roman and I'," Logan stated still typing on the computer.
We, well mostly them, worked on the project. I tried to help, but didn't really do anything use full. I could tell that Logan and Roman where annoyed at me. Patton was give concerning glances and I felt horrible. My anxiety was flaring up and I needed to get out of here.
"Are you just going to sit there and not help us?!" Roman shouted at me. I was so shocked and surprised that I jumped, I was about to say something when Roman cut me off
"You haven't spoken one word at all! Are mute or something? Why are you such a freak! Here we are, carrying a dead weight! Why don't you just leave?!" Roman was staring at me
I just grabbed my things and before they could say anything else I left.
I was running, the voices in my head screaming at me. It didn't help that was on the opposite side of town. I just kept running.
When I got home finally, it was super late. It took me around 5 hours of running and walking to get here. I prayed to whatever god there is that my dad was asleep. I opened the door to a very very furious and drunk man.
Of course
"Where the fuck where you?" He shouted, "I-I w-was w-wor-working o-on a-a sc-school pr-protect."
Curse my stutter
"Fucking pathetic, your such a mistake!" He hit me over the head with the beer bottle. He started to hit me, then when I fell down, kicking. His moves were sloppy from drinking, but he still knew where to hit. Then he grabbed my arm. He started to drag me towards the basement.
Oh no
My blood ran cold
You deserve this for being such a mistake
I saw my mom sitting and looking at my dad dragging me towards the basement. She knew what was in the basement, she knew everything but didn't care.
He threw me down the stairs.
"Take your jacket and shirt of you freak!" My dad ordered. I followed the orders because I knew that it would only be worse if I didn't.
He grabbed my wrists, after the clothing was discarded in the corner, and put them in the chains connected to the roof. He painfully ripped the tape off, loving the painful scream(the room is soundproof). It's the same tape from the other day, something I never touch or the beating is worse.
"I want to home everyday by 5" my father growled at me. I quickly shook my head nodding hoping that that would mean maybe I wouldn't get punished, but when did something ever go my way? Never.
He grabbed the freshly bloodied wings and pulled them into their restraints. My wings themselves hurt for never getting proper circulation. I actually don't even know what their color is, never seeing them.
He started to whip me, continue with punches. All I could think was
Why me?