Holding Back [COMPLETED]

Chapter 41 - "Why are you lying?"

The second the lunch bell rang and Haley stepped out of her classroom, she searched the hordes of students. It was a routine she had taken up after every class, looking for a set of glasses and blonde hair. Each time she had no luck. But as she waited just beyond her math class, she knew that she had to come across Isaac, knowing he visited Cal for lunch.

The minutes ticked by as students found tables and spots to spend their bit of freedom. The more the crowd thinned, the more Haley felt gnawing anxiety. When the main entrance was completely clear, Isaac still hadn't crossed her path.

Letting out a disappointed breath, Haley crossed over to her tree and sank down under it. She pushed aside the mixed emotions over Isaac, knowing for that moment she could do nothing to change the situation. She slipped her headphones in and let music distract her.

As she sat there taking in the scene she had studied for so long, it all looked the same yet somehow different. If wasn't as if she had seen things in black and white and now it was color, it was more than that. It was as if she were starting to see the facets of life, like a diamond shifting in the light.

The couple with their heads bent together were not simply a one-dimensional picture of teenage love, but a complex pattern of questions she didn't know the answers to. How did they get together? Nothing in life was perfect, so what troubles did they face? Did they deal with them together or alone? Did they see how their best friend looked at them?

The longer Haley watched the ever-changing tableau she could see how there was never a way for anyone to truly see and understand it all. What she had always thought she had been so smart about figuring out were the surface facts that anyone could see.

What she had missed were the underlining things that were kept too close to a person's heart to be seen from far away. It would take getting involved to truly see what was missed from the outside. Just as it had been for her and for the people she had gotten to know around her.

With that clarity, she began to write the essay she had failed to complete the day before. Everything from the previous weeks poured out of her, each revelation making her want to laugh. She had been so certain of how life worked but had only been seeing it from the sidelines. It was only once she had entered the race that she saw all the small aspects she had missed.

When the bell rang, she snapped herself out of her thoughts. She raised her head, realizing she had lost track of time and completely forgotten to eat. The essay was only half completed but what lay there was more than Haley had imagined she would ever learn.

Packing up her stuff, she slung her backpack on her shoulder and made her way to the office. The noise from outside was muffled as the door swung shut behind her. Dana emerged from the nurse's office, laughing, the remains of her lunch balled up.

Despite the months of working with the woman, Haley had never spared a thought for how she spent her lunch or with whom. When the older woman spotted Haley, she smiled. Before she could ask the customary question, Haley jumped in.

"How was your lunch?" she asked.

Dana's smile widened, her eyes crinkling.

"It was lovely. Nancy always has the best gossip," she said, pointing back to the doorway.

Haley laughed, surprised by the woman's teenage heart. As they both settled into their normal spots, Dana returned the favor.

"How was your lunch?" she asked.

Haley stared at nothing, smiling.

"Enlightening," she said, focusing on her companion.

"Oh?" Dana said, a playful smile tugging the corners of her mouth. "What made it so?"