what if it's us fanfiction

sixteen

evan's pov
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Arthur and Ben would be the worlds cutest couple if Connor and I had not gotten together. They are so adorable around each other. They keep doing that new couple thing where you look at the person you like and then quickly look away in hopes they didn't catch your eye. We walk by the school library when I finally blurt it out. "Y-You guys are cute together!" I wish I had at least one ounce of social skills because I just made the situation painfully awkward. "I'm sorry," I gulp terrified that I had overstepped. Ben is the first one to speak up.

"That's so nice of you to say," he beams as if I didn't stutter about how I felt about their entire relationship. "I think you and Connor should get together one weekend so I can meet him," Ben smirked, "we could all do a double date," Ben explains. I nod, tightly grabbing my arms to keep me steady. I hadn't seen Connor in ages, and I've been trying to avoid seeing him in person for as long as possible. I'm worried he'll think I've changed and dump me as soon as he sees me.

"Sounds GREAT!" my voice cracks as I try my best to smile at Ben, my acting must work because he turns back to Arthur and starts talking about double date ideas. I feel around my pocket for my phone to text Connor.

EVAN: i made a situation awkward ahaha!!!! how is your night going?

I sigh, seeing that Connor is inactive on his account and slip my phone back in my pocket. We had barely talked all week and we usually got to talk to each other every day after classes. Either both of us were busy doing homework or stuck in classes all day with no free time to talk. I feel like a needy boyfriend whenever I go hours without texting or calling Connor. I just miss him terribly and hope he's doing good. You know, while I wallow in my crippling self-hate.

I turn my attention to my dorm building. I liked Yale, and I had barely gotten in as it was. My mom somehow scrapped together enough money to stay for the first semester. I had to take out a student loan to stay for the second semester, which really made me nervous. According to my mother, it takes a while to pay off student debt, which I wasn't looking forward to doing. Yet, Yale was incredible to be at. I had never felt so happy and anxious to be learning in a new environment.

I walked up to our dorm, happily heading to the bathroom both Arthur and I share. I let Ben and Arthur have some time alone. I sighed, washed my hands, and checked to see if any notifications I had were from my boyfriend. It was sort of late meaning he could have some last-minute class he needed to attend or he was out busy with friends. The thought made my hands sweat. The only human interaction I had was with Arthur and my professors. I rarely talked to anyone I didn't need to talk to. Maybe the occasional food service worker to thank them for making my meal, but even that was hard.

I snapped back to attention when the phone in my hands buzzed, lighting up the screen and making me beam.

JARED: Hey acorn hows YALE?

Gosh. I roll my eyes, palms sweating a bit. I'm sort of upset that Jared is the only one texting me on a Friday night, but I got over it quick. At least I was getting a text!

EVAN: its really good, i like a lot of the teacher and the classes are difficult enough. hahhaahaghahahahah what do you mean by acorn?

I get a message back instantly.

JARED: jesus i can hear your laugh through the phone. remember senior year when you fell outta the tree? acorn? whatever its grade A humor that probably goes right over your head. anyways i'm skipping all my classes this week, what are you doing this week, other than being nerdy Hah.

EVAN: i'm hanging out with my roommates' boyfriend at the moment so i'll let you know if anything during the week arises. okay BYE JARED. >_<

I turned my phone over so I didn't have to see the thousands of texts coming from Jared. I was going to hang out with Arthur and Ben without getting anxious and worrying about why Connor wasn't texting back. I was going to not be anxious. I am going to not be anxious.

JARED: insanely cool jared k gets left on read? how insanely not cool, hansen

JARED: okay have fun with your roommates' boyfriend???

JARED: oh that sounded dirty.

JARED: KINKY

JARED: KINKY KINKY

JARED: okay i guess you really did turn off your phone

JARED: kinky!

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