Because This Is My First✔️

🕹️007🕹️

Chapter Seven : Because This Is Jealousy.
P.O.V. : Kenma Kozume
Date : XX-XX-XX

Hinata and i sat on the roof as usual looking out on to the school yard watching the other students enjoying there lunchbreak in peaceful bliss. The atmosphere up here between Hinata and i is a little odd and i am really tired of all this oddness around us. Everything was fine between us but now everything feels pressured, tiresome, uncomfortable and very confusing and i imagine that this is also a bother for Hinata too. He's dealing with a lot as of late, one of those issue is the shaky relationship between him and Kuro which does effect him no matter how tough he acts. I sighed hugging my knees to my chest resting my head on Hinata's shoulder, a chuckle escaped his lips as he stared out into the school yard letting me use his arm as a pillow. The atmosphere once again changed and this time it was much more comfortable and i felt like i could finally breath.

I shifted my gaze from the school yard so i could examine Hinata's facial features. After a while i ended up falling asleep right there and then, i didn't get much of a good nights rest last night since my mind was stuck in power mode which really made it difficult to fall asleep right away. I don't know if it was because i was feeling tired all day or because i was around Hinata that i was finally able to sleep and even dream. In that dream Hinata and i were dating, we looked happy yet i could feel like Hinata wasn't as happy, he looked sad like he was dealing with a lot. Was i to much? Are my problems to much for him to handle? I am socially awkward boy who can't even go to the store if it was to crowed cause i'll have a panic attack like a weakling, i can't even remember the times Kuro and Hinata had come to my rescue due to my own lack of confidence and strength. I can't let Hinata be the one to always protect me, it isn't right i need to give a little on my part too. I need to protect him too, in my own way but i'll never be able to if i keep being so weak and don't try to change myself. I've yet to even figure out IF what i am feeling for him is actually real, so how can i be sure?. How can i be sure that its not my mind playing tricks on me? I don't want to end up hurt Hinata IF he feels the same way about me.

My eyes fluttered open as i woke up from a nice and short nap to find my head in Hinata's lap. I smiled softly when i saw his face, i closed my eyes as he leaned down capturing my lips with his for a short and passionate kiss. Hinata pulled away from the kiss chuckling slightly with a wide grin on his face as his thumbs gently rubbed the side of my face. He kissed me again and i liked it very much, it was short and sweet but i wanted more then just that from him. I wanted to kiss more, hours upon hours i wanted to show him how much i loved him by showering him with kisses but i can't, not the way that i am now. I needed to be absolutely sure that this feelings i have were real, i wanted to be absolutely sure that this isn't just a phase.

" Hinata?." I called out his name softly. He replied with a hum making me smile slightly as i looked up at his pretty face. " There's something i want to tell you but your not gonna like it."

" And what is that?." He asked with a raised brow.

" I think we should take a break from each other, just for a little while till we figure all this out."

" Wait, Wait.." He said his face dripping with concern and confusion. " Is this about this morning? If so i will apologize as long as i have too." He said pressing his forehead against mine. " I'm sorry please don't avoid me."

" I am not going to avoid you because of what happened." I sighed softly. " I won't lie but seeing Yucchan so boldly confess to you in front of everyone made me very jealous. She was a lot of things i wasn't. She was brave, fearless even and she could of easily become your girlfriend if i wasn't around but i am here and if were going to figure this out and see if we can really be together then." I got into a seating position, sitting in front of a stunned Hinata who was struggling to find his words. " I am pretty sure i'm in love with you but i want to be sure, i want to change for you, i wanna be able to protect you when you need protecting but i can't do that if i am like this. So i need to change, i need time away from you to get my feelings in order and so should you." I smiled softly at him before leaning forward pressing my lips against him. He cupped my face in his hands deepening the kiss a bit more causing a small moan to escape in between kisses.

" Is this really okay?." I nodded my head nuzzling against his shoulder. " Okay then. If you can do this then i can as well." I chuckled slightly before getting off the floor on to my feet dusting myself off. He grabbed my hand before i could walk away and planted a small kiss on the back of it causing me to blush slightly. " I love you too, Kenma and i also want to love you just a bit more. "

I let my hand slowly slip out of his as i walked away leaving him alone on the roof to be in his feelings. I pressed my back against the wooden door sighing heavily, Kuro stood there lunch in hand waiting for me to come out and judging by this facial expression he heard everything that was said between me and Hinata.

" I won't give up either." He said before taking a very large bite off his sandwich. " I know that i like you Kenma so i won't give up on trying to be with you." I closed my eyes for a brief second before looking up into Kuro's eyes. How did it come to this? i thought to myself before descending the stairs, Kuro following closely behind.