Epilogue (Part II)

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• Monique's P.O.V •

My shift is about to end, but Dejour buzzes me into his room. I'm lowkey pissed off because I really just want to go home and sleep. I've been trying to get overtime hours and it's been giving me like five hours of sleep. And that's on a good day.

"Yes, Dejour?" I ask, practically stopping his make-out session with Erica.

"Oh, and I'm sorry, but visiting hours are over," I say politely.

She laughs, "Surely you can make an exception. I mean, we're friends."

"I'm sorry, Erica. My job is on the line. I am asking you nicely to leave."

She huffs, "I'll be back tomorrow baby."

Then she walks out, but not before mugging me. I swear she acts like a damn two-year old. Lord, bless her child.

"You ain't have to do all that."

"Really, Dejour? Maybe you haven't met the new me, but I'm very serious about my job. Now, do you need something or not?" I ask again, clenching my jaw.

"I need help going to the bathroom."

Shit. Shit. Shit.

I was hoping this wouldn't come up.

"You okay, Monique? You look a little pale," he smirks.

"Shutup," I hiss back.

"You still feelin' ya boy? Woow."

"Don't flatter yourself," I roll my eyes.

He's playing a game. And he's winning.

"But I saw your mouth drop when you found out Erica was pregnant." Really? Why me?

"I don't know what you're talking about. I have to go." I try to quickly leave, but he grips me by my arm.

"Monique, quit the bullshit act. Tell me how you really feel."

"You really wanna know?"

"Of course. We used to tell each other everything." He replies, letting go of my arm.

"Dejour, I can't be around you for more than fifteen minutes without feelings coming back. Why do you think I said I wanted to be strangers? I love your ass! But it just isn't right. You're doing your thing in LA, I'm in New York. You're happy, I'm trying to be happy. But, Dejour Carter, you always fuck it up."

"Why can't we be together?" Is he really asking this?

"You have a damn child on the way with a girl you're with! What more is there to be holding us back?!"

"You! You were always holding us back! I get you're scared, but you let that shit take over!"

Damn. He's right. I was always scared. Scared of being broken again. And I ruined it for us.

"It's too late now anyways.." I say rushing out.

I need to get out of here, now. After being cleared to leave, I hop in my Benz and drive home in silence. This shit sucks, seriously. Why whenever I become happy, Dejour comes back into the picture. I get it, its karma! How much more karma am I going to get?

My phone starts ringing and I pick it up immediately, "Hello?"

"Mo!" A voice calls from the other end.

"Jasmine?!"

"Hey boo! I'm in town this week, I wanna see you!"

"Of course! I'm on my way home now, lemme text you the address."

With everything that happen today, I'm really glad Jas is in town. I just want to relax and vent to her about all this.

***

"Are you serious? Your life is much more interesting then mine!" She jokes after I finish catching her up.

"I had a perfectly normal, boring life until Dejour showed up."

"This is a sign, Mo.." She says quietly.

"Or karma," I point out.

"Do you love him?"

"Huh..." I trail off, trying to avoid the question

"Quit the bullshit. Do you, Monique Rodriguez, love Dejour Carter?"

"Yes, Jasmine, damn. I love him. I'll always love him and that fucking eats at me everyday."

"Then why'd you leave, Monique!"

I can't do it anymore. I've avoided this topic for almost five years. This shit is all about to come out. The tears just start coming.

"Because I was scared! Now look at me, I'm fucking a mess! I walk around like I'm happy everyday when I really just want to break down and cry."

"Then go get your ass up and get him!"

"It's not that easy. He has a child on the way and on top of that, he's fucking happy."

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