Be Mine

// f o u r t e e n //

:: chapter fourteen ::

Dara giggled as she pulled herself away from him. He smiled then bit his lips to suppress it, but it seems like all those years that he have stopped feeling emotions, the time he did not wasted on smiling nor laughing just poured out that moment. That no matter how he tried to suppress himself he just can’t wipe that smile, that giddy smile on his lips. Jiyong shook his head a bit as he stood up and reached his hand to her as Dara grabbed it still wearing a smile on her lips. She almost lost balance but she was caught by Jiyong.

Jiyong wrapped his arm on her waist. ‘I like it when you’re always falling, it gives me purpose,’ he whispered making Dara turned beet red. ‘But I like it more when you smile, it gives me reason to live,’ he said with a smile on his lips as their eyes stared at each other. Dara was left dumbfounded, unable to utter a single word. She felt like her heart just stopped beating, and that was not good but looking into his eyes and seeing his smile just revive her heart with unexplainable currents of electricity stronger than anything, that can’t just power a whole city but light up someone’s whole life. Dara smiled as her eyes were starting to get watery again. She gave Jiyong a quick tight hug. ‘Let’s just go to the infirmary, shall we Mr. Mine?’ she said biting her lips hiding her smiles as he covered his face with his hands even though it was stained with blood, just to hide his giddiness.

They both reached the empty infirmary, since both the nurse and school doctor were having their lunch. They entered and went to the sink. Jiyong helped Dara removed her school coat as Dara pushed her sleeves up to avoid it from getting wet. Since Jiyong never really wore the school coat he just pushed his sleeves up. Dara turned the faucet on as Jiyong placed both his hands on the running water. He watched as the water slowly removed the dried blood on his hands. He watched as the water slowly become red and went down the drain.

He snapped his head on Dara who welcomed him smiling. She just held his hand and helped him wash the blood off it. Jiyong smiled as Dara started playing with both of their hands. Jiyong grabbed the soap as he started making it foam and blowing bubbles with it making Dara laugh. Dara also did the same thing and they ended up playing with their hands making it bubbled as they just keep on staring at each other with a smile on their lips.

In that instant Jiyong knew the answer to why he was never able to smile at her even once, though she showered him with her beautiful smiles. It was because he was afraid, afraid that if he smiled he will forget loneliness, he will forget emptiness and he will start to live a life that never knew sadness. Yes, it was indeed wonderful but for him it was scarier than anything else. He doesn’t know if he will survive not seeing her for a second. He was afraid that his life with intertwine hers, that he won’t be able to completely survive without her by his side. He was afraid that he won’t be the Jiyong he used to be. He was afraid that he will completely change, that the cold steel armor he built over years by himself will rust and turned to dust blown by the wind and gone with it.

But more than that he was afraid that he will lose her, it was something so fearful, terrifying than death itself.

He let out a small smile as he realized how idiot he was. He was afraid that her life will intertwine with his, when from the moment their eyes landed on each other their souls were already connected by an unbreakable bond. No, maybe like the silliest myth he has ever heard they were connected already from the beginning. They were tied by that unbreakable red thread. He was afraid that he would be changed, he was afraid that he won’t know himself anymore, when from the moment she smiled on him he knew something inside him changed. No, everything in him and his whole life changed.

He was afraid, but when she saw him at his worst, when she smiled and ask him to be hers. It was as if those worries, those fears, those doubts never existed that he barely didn’t knew them. He knew she will be forever his. And that was enough. It was more than enough.