my little secret ; lana del rey

14

Lana's PoV

Slowly i open my eyes noticing that the bed is empty and Lucy is no longer here. I get out of bed and look to my right seeing the balcony door open. Lucy is sat watching the sunset, her skin glowing through the colours of the sun. It's fair to say that i've never felt like this before, i've never ever met anyone who makes me feel like Lucy does. and i suppose that's kind of scary, because me and Lucy just can't be together it's just how it is, and if i loose her i don't know how I would ever cope.

"Lana whatever we have, whatever this is it needs to stop, now" Lucy says as I pull up a chair next to her. I excepted this was coming. The sad part is that i know she's right, I just don't want to picture my life without her in it.
"I know your right, but I don't want you to be right" I tell her.

2 YEARS LATER...........

"Thank you so much guys, I love you" I say into the mic whilst the crowd cheers, I give them one last wave before leaving the stage. I can't even explain how much and how quickly everything has changed. Me and Brad broke up last year as he began being abusive which wasn't great. Lucy. Well, I don't really know what happened to Lucy after the last night of holiday we never spoke to each other again, I really hope she has found someone that makes her happy. So after the release of my album born to die, i kind of became famous and yeah i enjoy it, singing nearly ever night to my babies is what keeps me going otherwise I don't think i'd still be here.

Last year I got into drugs, i've stopped it now because my fans all knew and were helping me and stuff which was good. My latest album Ultra-violence has just been released over a week ago and it's going well. However my mental health isn't going well, I literally have nobody,i'm all alone out here.

"LANA I LOVE YOU, CAN I GET A PHOTO?" a load of fans shout as I exit the arena. I take a few photos and have a small chat with a few of the girls, but then get into the car and leave. Tomorrow night is the last night of tour in my home town of LA. "6am tomorrow lana" my driver James says as he drops me off at the hotel. I nod and walk away getting chased by paparazzi as i walk into the hotel. I head into my room and collapse onto the floor with my head in my hands, feeling my depression and all the emotions i've been working to stop fill my body once again. Tears escape my eyes as I excepted which i can't stop, instead i just drift slowly off to sleep.

Lucy's PoV
the next day

"Lucy come to Lana with us we got you a ticket and everything" one of my college friends amy tells me. "come on I don't understand, you love her music and plus Kelsey is going" one of my other friends says. "I told you though, i know her and it ended badly" I tell them all. They all shake there heads and laugh. "Come on it's not like she's going to see you, there's thousands of people there" Amy says again just as Kelsey come in our dorm room. "Ok fine" I tell them

"Let's get there early I want to go to the merch stand and meet the support act" My friend Lucas tells us. As you can probably tell I now go to college, i've made a whole new group of friends who are amazing and to be honest i haven't been happier. Me, Amy, Lucas, Danielle and Kelsey all squeeze ourselves into my car. It's not a very long drive because our apartment block is just outside of LA so it should take about an hour. "Have you seen Lana since you know?" Kelsey whispers to me from the passenger seat. "Nope" I whisper back and sigh. "Do they know?" She asks signalling to my friends in the back. I shake my head and focus on the road. I took down at my neck and notice i'm wearing the L necklace she got me for my birthday that time, i don't think i've ever taken it off properly. Kelsey notices what i'm looking at and puts her hand on my leg to calm me down. "Hey kels put this on for me" Amy says handing Kelsey a CD. Kelsey presses the button and another CD comes out, she stares at it for a while and then looks at me. I look at the Cd which has "Lana Del Rey draft 1" written on it. Fuck. I take the Cd from Kelsey and put it next to me, i can't believe i still have that in there.

Don't get me wrong I'm completely over Lana, I don't even think about her anymore but today is going to hurt a lot. I wonder how she is, is she happy, is she single, does she remember me, does she miss me?. I guess i'll never know and i don't really want to. "We're here" Lucas says as I pull into the car park. "Shit it's already busy maybe people are going on early". We head to the que and join at the back. The crowd all begin to move and we head into a building which is full of Lana del rey signs. "I can't wait to meet her" a girl says in front of me looking excited. Wait a minute. "This is the fucking meet and greet section" I say to my friends angrily. "Luce we might have not told you the full truth, we're kind of all meeting Lana" Danielle says showing me the VIP tickets. "Your such dicks, i'm getting out of here" i say but one of the stewards stop me. "i'm sorry darling you can't exit that way you have to go through the meet and greet where Lana is" he tells me smiling. My friends look at me and laugh, "don't worry you don't have to meet her just take photos for us with kelsey" Amy says.

I shake my head, I can't believe this is happening right now. And to be fair I can't even blame my friends because they don't know what happened between me and Lana. Overall i'm just fucked.

"Your next ladies" The women says to us, letting the people in front of us to go to Lana. That's when I looked up and saw her, right there in front of my eyes. She's changed, her hairs darker she looks tired. I gulp and take my eyes off her noticing the girls in front have almost finished. Kelsey rubs my back to comfort me but nothing is going to help me right now. I'm just praying she doesn't look at me.

It's our turn, the woman moves the fence and lets us in. Amy hands me her phone and I begin videoing them. Lana gives them all hugs and talks to them for a short while before getting into position, putting her arms round them and facing my way ready for a photo. At first she looks at Kelsey's camera, and i spot a small frown on her face as she definitely recognises her. But then her eyes meet mine and her face goes into a slight shocked expression. She takes her arms off my friends smiling at them slightly before looking back at me. My friends start to leave not noticing mine and Lana's gaze. Kelsey comes up to me and puts her hand on my back. "Lets go we're finished" She says trying to lead me out, when I hear a small whisper from behind me. "Lucy" Lana says, filling my ears with her soft voice. I take one last look at her before we left the building. We get lead into the arena straight after and guess what, we're right at the fucking front.