Tonight

In Your Every Day, I'm There

Seokjin's discomfort around Jungkook lessened the more often he visited. The more he visited, the longer he ended up staying. The longer he stayed, the more feelings of fondness he began to develop.

This isn't good.

He had never had problems keeping an emotional membrane around himself when he was around his patients. In training, he was told that one, of course, was allowed to feel for the patients and their families, but one wasn't allowed to become involved. Most importantly though, one should definitely not become attached to a patient in hospice.

Seokjin felt like he was breaking all the rules. He allowed himself to accept an incredible drawing that Jungkook sketched of Seokjin. He secretly gifted Jungkook a paint set with some brushes to help fight the boredom when Seokjin was away. He allowed himself to start to become attached.

If this isn't good, then why does it feel so good to connect with him? What was wrong with being close with a patient?

Seokjin huffed and turned off his car. It was Saturday again and he couldn't wait to get inside to see Jungkook, but he was also feeling guilty about breaking the rules. He pushed the thought away and his thoughts wandered to Jungkook again. He had been having headaches lately, which had been cutting their visits short. Seokjin hoped Jungkook was feeling better today. He had a surprise for him.

Seokjin clocked in and kept himself from sprinting into the courtyard. The weather had been getting steadily nicer as June turned into July. It was going to turn out to be a hot summer, but Seokjin didn't mind that. It meant more days outside with Jungkook, sitting and chatting underneath the trees in the courtyard.

He'd learned a lot about Jungkook. They talked a lot about food and tv shows and stories about when they were younger, about their families. Jungkook always seemed sullen when talking about his parents. Afterwards, he would become quiet before changing the subject to the recent sports game or if there was a book that Seokjin recommended.

From what Seokjin was able to gather though is that his parents were pretty absent in his life. They traveled a lot and often left Jungkook behind with the care of a nanny and then on his own as he got older. Jungkook briefly mentioned that they were scientists of some sort and their research often took them to other countries for lectures or case studies.

Seokjin didn't have to be a scientist to know that Jungkook was lonely. He could see it in his face before they made eye contact on his arrival. Jungkook would usually be slumped in his wheelchair staring at nothing or playing checkers for the hundredth time with an elderly patient who could barely remember their own name.

He desperately wanted to take Jungkook away from this place, but he knew that was impossible.

Seokjin entered the courtyard and recognized the back of Jungkook's head. Unlike some of the other residents, Jungkook kept himself very neat and tidy. Seokjin could always catch a whiff of soap from his hair as he wheeled Jungkook around. It was nice. He began associating the smell of cleanliness with Jungkook.

Creeping up from behind, Seokjin covered Jungkook's eyes.

"Well, I wonder who that could be..." Jungkook said. Seokjin could feel his cheeks puff up under his hands, indicating he was grinning.

Seokjin lifted his hands and walked around to face Jungkook and had to suppress a gasp.

Despite his smile, Jungkook looked absolutely haggard. His normally bright eyes looked dull and listless and the front of his hair was disheveled, like it hadn't been combed or he had been raking his hands through his hair aggressively.

Before Seokjin could speak, Jungkook waved his hand and sighed. Seokjin's concern must have been apparent on his face.

"I know... I'm starting to look like one of them..." Jungkook gestured to one of the elderly gentlemen sitting in a wheelchair.