Not by Blood - BEING REWRITTEN IN SEPARATE STORY

Chapter Sixteen

EDITED 5/30/2020

"You can't be serious." Wesley laughed.

"I am," Clary insisted.

"Who folds their clothes before they hide them under the bed?" Wesley chuckled before taking a sip of his wine.

"I guess I was just a strange child." Clary said with a grin, then she sobered. "That was the first time I talked about her and didn't break down."

"Your mother?" Wesley clarified, although he knew exactly whom she was talking about.

Clary nodded. "Yeah. Jocelyn."

"Why do you call her that?" Wesley asked, leaning back in his chair. "Why not mom?"

"It's confusing. Yes, Jocelyn is my mom, will always be my mom, but I guess I just got in the habit of making a clear difference between Jocelyn and Maryse. Both of them are my mom's but I don't want to confuse any of my siblings when I'm talking about one or the other. Jocelyn is Jocelyn and Maryse is mom." She shrugged.

"But it makes you feel as though you're betraying her." Wesley said.

"Sometimes." Clary admitted. "But I also know she'd want me to be happy, whatever the cost."

"I'm sure she would. But can you live with yourself right now? With what you're feeling inside? You're falling apart. I've just met you and I can already see it."

Uncomfortable with how quickly the tone of the conversation changed, Clary changed the subject. "Do you think that Magnus expects us to end up together? Because I was getting a very 'Match-Maker' vibe from him earlier." She chuckled without humor.

Wesley did not seem impressed with her diversion but answered all the same.

"I know that he does, and I can see why he would think that." A corner of his mouth lifted in a slight smile. "However, if anything were to happen between us, it wouldn't be now. Especially given the state that you're in."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Clary asked indignantly.

"I mean, that I won't have you love me more than you love yourself. You have got to work through these feelings, Clary. They are ruling your life, they are overtaking you. You cannot allow yourself to drown in them. Do you understand?" He said all of this with so much kindness and tenderness that Clary couldn't stand it.

"Yeah." She whispered. "Do you mind? I've got to use the restroom."

Wesley smiled at her and gestured for her to go. She stood up and walked towards the back of the bistro, finding the ladies room with ease. She quickly opened the door and walked into a stall, locking it before she pulled her stele out from her handbag. She drew a rune into the air and stepped into the portal that appeared before her.

She came out into Magnus' apartment, startling her brother and his boyfriend pretty badly. They jerked apart from each other and looked at her in shock.

"Sorry." Clary said slowly, raising an eyebrow at them.

Magnus shook himself. "It's fine. What happened?"

"Nothing." Clary frowned, glancing over her shoulder at the clock. "Why?"

"You came here instead of the Institute." Alec pointed out.

"Yeah." Clary sighed, looking between the both of them before settling on looking Magnus in the eye. "What we were talking about earlier, maybe I could use from space from ... it. You said you wanted me to have a room here, I was wondering if I could use it for a while."