Not by Blood - BEING REWRITTEN IN SEPARATE STORY

Chapter Twenty Five - Interlude

EDITED 5/30/2020

"Alexander." Magnus sighed, leaning against the door jamb of the room. "Don't you think we should join the party?"

"You don't have to be here. Go." Alec mumbled back. He was standing in the middle of the room, his gaze fixed on a picture hung on the wall. The picture was of the five Lightwood siblings, not long after Max's rune ceremony.

"Darling, you shouldn't be alone in here." Magnus explained gently. "You're hurting. We all are. But your brother wouldn't want this."

Alec's shoulders trembled. "It feels wrong. To be celebrating like this without him. So soon after what happened."

"After he died." Magnus pressed. "I know it hurts to say or even think, but you're never going to heal if you can't even say the word."

Alec spun around and glared fiercely at the man. "Max is dead. Jace is dead. There were five of us!" He flings a hand back to point at the picture hung on the wall. "How are there only three left? How is that fair?"

"It isn't." Magnus admitted. "But unfortunately it is our reality. We have to accept it no matter how painful. Instead of sitting in our grief and wallowing and entertaining the what if's, we should start living life for them. Do things and think of them. Make this world a better place in their name. Don't let their sacrifices be in vain. Don't let their deaths be for nothing, and don't let their lives amount to nothing. Don't let them be forgotten."

"I haven't forgotten them." Alec replied, no heat or venom behind his words any longer.

Magnus walked over and sat on the edge of Jace's old bed. He opened his arms and Alec willingly went into them, sitting beside his fiancé and melting into his side.

"I'll never forget them," Alec whispered into Magnus' shoulder. "And I won't let anyone else I love get hurt, ever again. You, Madzie, Clary, Izzy. I can't lose anyone else. I won't."

"Darling," Magnus sighed into Alec's hair. "Unfortunately, loss is just part of life. It's how the world works. People die, they leave us. You can't avoid it, as much as I wish I could spare you the pain. One day your parents will die, and your sisters and you. You will die, and Madzie and I will be left behind. You aren't the only one that has or will lose someone they love."

"And you'll find someone else some day." Alec said, the words like a fist squeezing his heart painfully. He didn't want to think about Magnus with anyone else.

"No." Magnus shook his head, the motion making Alec look up into Magnus', surprisingly, unglamoured eyes. "There won't be anyone after you. You are the love of my life, Alexander. I won't be able to even look at anyone else after you leave me."

Alec sat up suddenly, breaking Magnus' comforting hold on him. He grabbed Magnus' hands in his own, a smile growing on his face. "Then make me immortal." He suggested giddily. "Make me immortal and I can be with you forever! You and me and Madzie! And we can have more kids too! Maybe even a son."

Magnus shook his head, he reached a hand up as Alec's face fell and stroked his cheek. "As much as I selfishly want to keep you forever," he said sadly. "I can't do that to you. Immortality is a curse, my love. You will have to watch your sisters and parents die. Your family wither away over time. You don't really want that."

"Clary, she's in love with Wesley, I think. Or on her way to it. She will want to become immortal, too. To be with him. And Izzy she loves Simon. Maybe she'll want to become immortal, too. I won't have to lose them. But that doesn't matter, if they do or don't I still want forever, with you. I can't stomach the idea of leaving you behind, alone. Magnus, I'm begging you. Please."

Magnus shook his head again. "No, Alexander."

Alec stared at Magnus blankly. It was like a switch had been flipped, suddenly all the emotions that had been written all over his face had disappeared and all Magnus was left with was this emotionless shell.

"Alexander," he said quietly, begging as well. Begging for him to not hate him for this.

"It's like you said." Alec's voice was hollow. "We should join the party." He rose from his spot on the bed and practically flew from the room.

Magnus hunched over on the edge of the bed and placed his head in his hands. He allowed the tears to streak down his cheeks, just for a moment, only because no one was there to witness him.

He had wanted so desperately to throw his arms around his love's neck and kiss him until his lips bruised, but he couldn't. He wouldn't give Alexander immortality to see him grow to resent him. Because, eventually, he would have. They all did.

Not Alexander. Not this time.