Jc Caylen Imagines.

Jc Leaves... The End

         I don't know what to do right now. After Jc talked, I had him leave the room so I could think. I missed him and everything about him, but him leaving was my fault. I was holding him back from what he loved doing most. He says that it isn't my fault that he left, but I already know it is. 

        I laid back against my headboard and closed my eyes. All I could see is him. His perfect  smile, his brown eyes, his hair pushed back into a bandanna and I could hear his laugh. I just smiled to myself, knowing damn well I love hearing him laugh. My mind had also wandered to him leaving and how heartbroken I was. I just took a few deep breaths and sat up. 

        As hard as it has been having him back here, under the safe roof as me, I've loved it. It's been awkward and weird, but he's here, in my life again. I then thought again, he's in my life again. I honestly don't want him to think that he can just leave and then come back into my life when he pleases. That's not how this shit works. 

       I pondered over my options for what felt like hours, when in reality, it was only twenty minutes. I knew that I came to a decision, but I didn't know how to tell him. I guess just spilling it without beating around the bush was my best way to go. I sighed and stood from my bed, petting Wishbone on my way out of my bedroom. I walked slowly to the living room, taking a deep breath before stepping into the room. 

       Jc was on his phone when I sat on the couch beside him. He locked his phone and put it in his pocket. He looked down at his hands before looking into my eyes. 

     "We don't need to talk about this now if you aren't ready," Jc spoke softly. Of course he would be so understanding about it. Him saying that makes this so much harder. 

      "I am ready to talk about it, it's just pretty difficult," I said looking down at my hands in my lap. 

      "When you left, I was broken. I was torn apart. I didn't know what to do, I was a completely different person. I was hoping that I would have been able to handle the situation better, and accept that you weren't coming back. Then you just show up, again, I was put in a position where I didn't know what to do. I wasn't sure if I was going to slam the door in your face or let you in. But I let you in. These past few days have been... weird. From you being gone so long to you being here when I wake up in the morning or when I went to sleep. As much as I wanted you in bed with me, I just wasn't ready for that yet. I honestly don't think I could ever be ready to sleep next to again after what you put me through. So, what I'm about to say isn't going to be easy. I don't think you being here, or being together again is a good idea. I think you should go." 

     I was surprised that I wasn't crying or felt a burning in my throat. I just let it out, no holding back. 

     Jc on the other hand, I don't know what is going through his mind right now. His eyes shifted from mine back down to his hands. He closed his eyes and nodded his head. 

    "If you think that is what's best, then I will respect your decision. I will text Kian and ask if I can stay with him until I can find an apartment. I'll be gone before tomorrow," Jc said, almost in a whisper. He patted my hand quickly before getting up from the couch and leaving the room. When he left, I just put my head in my hands and sighed. I know what I did was right, especially for me and my mental health. 

  **

       It's now been a few hours since I told Jc that we couldn't be together, and he still hasn't come out of the bathroom. I figured I would just give him some space. I walked into the kitchen and went straight for the snack cabinet. I just stood there looking at my options. I grabbed a bag of nacho cheese Doritos and closed the cabinet door. As I turned around, I saw Jc coming into the kitchen. We just stood there, looking at each other. Jc gave me a small smile, and started walking over to me. I put the chips on the table and waited for Jc stand in front of me. He put his arms around me and I put mine around him. I could tell he was hurting, but he didn't say a word. 

       "I'll always love you (y/n), don't forget that. If you ever need anything, let me know. I'll always be there for you, just a text or call away," Jc whispered in my ear. 

        I just nodded my head, not having words to say. Jc's arms loosened and let go of me, I let go of him. He kissed my cheek and smiled, and walked into the living room. I just stood there for a few more seconds before grabbing my chips and went to my room. Wishbone was still on my bed, I picked him up and took him out to Jc. Wishbone curled up next to Jc and just stared at me. I kissed his little head and went back to the bedroom. 

        I laid my head down and stared up at the ceiling. I placed my hands over my face and sighed. I closed my eyes and slowly drifted off to sleep. 

        When I woke up, I checked my phone and it said 9:47 pm. I didn't realize I slept that long. The apartment seemed a little quieter than before. I went out to the living room, and Jc was no where to be found. I spotted a little note on the couch, it read, 

"Dear (y/n), I'm sorry about everything. I knew you wanted me to leave, so I did... I hope this isn't goodbye, and that we could try to be friends in the future. I'm always a text or call away, if you need anything. I love you, always have and always will." 

       That was the last time I heard from Jc.