#Promise

Life Changes

                   Having met Jimin and falling in love with him has been an extremely overwhelming experience for me. It has changed my life completely in ways that I cannot even begin to imagine. How can I, a nobody, suddenly become the most hated person by the BTS fandom? No matter how hard I think about it, I just don't find logic in everything that has happened. I just felt that it was so unfair. Is this the price I have to pay for loving someone like him? If so, then is it really worth being with him? My heart ached at the thought of having doubts about my choice to be in a relationship with him.
                   Just as I thought that the worst thing that could happen was the incident at the airport, I was totally mistaken. I was on sick leave from work for a few days, as advised  by the doctor to give myself time to recover from the incident, when I received a call from the HR department of the hospital that I work for.
"We are so sorry to inform you that we couldn't hire you as a regular full-time employee in this hospital anymore. There has been a lot of unnecessary disruption in the facility recently and they were  all related to you. Since you are still in training, the hospital has decided to terminate your employment with us. You will be receiving your last paycheck for your training period. You will only have until the end of this week to report to work."
Apparently, somebody who recognized me from work, have posted on social media and mentioned which hospital I worked at and that I have been rumored to having been seen at the floor where Jimin was admitted as a patient and that I was stalking him. Of course, netizens got mad again without even knowing what the real story was.The rumors got out of hand to the point where fans literally came to the hospital looking for me and filed a petition for the hospital to reprimand me for invading Jimin's privacy during his hospital stay.
Although the hospital was fully aware that the accusations about me invading a patient's privacy were false, they just thought that the whole media and crowds of fans gathering up at the hospital causing some disturbance was unacceptable. Just like that, I lost my job even before I officially got hired.
When will This nightnare ever end? How can people be so mean? What did I ever do to deserve all this? I found myself silently crying at first and slowly ended up breaking down in uncontrollable and hysterical tears. I felt so helpless and so alone without anyone to reach out to. My phone rang and as soon as I saw who was calling, I did not hesitate to answer it because at that point, he was the only one I can hold on to.
"J-J-Jimin....." I answered the phone with a trembling voice and trembling hands.
"What happened? Why are you crying?" he asked, obviously still unaware of what their fans had done to me this time.
"I lost my job today..... how can this happen? How can they do this to me?" I managed to say in between sobs.
" What do you mean?" he asked, not quite comprehending what I was talking about.
"I am so sorry for putting you through all of this." He replied sadly after I explained to him what had happened.
" It is not your fault" I said, because I know that  he too was not to be blamed for any of this.
"I will talk to my company. We have to do something about this. This has to stop. What are they gonna do to you next?" he said sounding obviously upset about how things have gotten out of hand.

                       Jimin has been wanting for their management company to release an official statement regarding the truth about my real relationship with the group without having to
reveal my relationship with Jimin but just letting the fans know that I am not an obsessed fan but rather, somebody that the group personally knows, so that the matter will ultimately be cleared. After a very careful consideration and extensive talks between the boys and their company, the management still thought that it wouldn't be best to openly defend me because then, they would have to deal with the fandom's jealousy. They had just advised both the boys and myself to let things be and not to say anything and that the issue will eventually die down.
                          Weeks passed and I still get hate messages on the internet. I have deactivated all my social media accounts but somehow, some of them find a way to get to me. Death threats left and right. I just can't help but to really feel that my life is in danger. I wanted to run away. Run away from this nightmare. Run away as far as I can.

A phone call directly from their boss have caught me by surprise one morning. He sounded so warm when he greeted me over the phone but I knew that it wasn't a friendly call but rather something really serious that concerns Jimin and his job. He sounded sincere when he apologized about the whole airport incident and the trouble that it has caused me.
" I am sincerely sorry for all that has happened. It shouldn't have happened and I know you did not deserve any of that", he said in a very calm manner that somehow put me at ease.
" The group is in the middle of their concert tour and will soon start preparing for their next album. I need all of them to be 100% focused. I can sense that they all are worried because I heard that you are a friend to all of them so it is but normal for them to be worried about you." he continued.
" I am hoping that you can take my word that we will help you. The company is laying out a plan so you can go back to living your life. I just want to ask you for one thing, please do not contact Jimin for now. Just let us wrap up the tour and finish the album. All I ask is some time. It will be hard for Jimin but I know he will do his best because this is his job. I am not trying to get between the two of you. I do want them to live their lives as normally as they can but I'm sure that you would agree with me that it will be unfair for the other members if Jimin cannot give his full attention to his work. I hope you do understand."
I did understand his point. My mind understood it all but my heart was rebelling. My tears fell the minute I hang up the phone. I felt like I was dying.

Starting a new life in a new place with a new job is the next challenge for me. I flew halfway accross the world with a hopeful spirit. The company, true to their word, have help me get back on my feet again. They got me a place to stay and have found me a job. I was hesitant to accept this offer at first but knowing that it would take me closer to Jimin was enough reason for me to say yes. Although I knew I couldn't break my promise of not getting in touch with him, the thought that he is just nearby was enough to comfort my agonizing heart.

I started work at a hospital near the apartment that the company found for me. It was just a few blocks away so transportation to and from work wasn't a problem. Getting around the city was not a hassle since everything is pretty much accessible from where I am staying at. I am used to the city life that is why I am thankful that I am staying in Seoul. The harder part of adjusting to this new place and culture was literally seeing BTS everywhere. Their billboards, their posters, pictures and videos are everywhere in the city. Even the buses and train stations are covered with their images. A sudden feeling of fear overcame me when I realized how extremely popular they really are. I thought that It is indeed very necessary to be very cautious about being caught by their fans since I am now in their home country. Maybe, the idea of staying away and not getting in touch with them was what was best for me after all.