"Do you love me?" (Jeffmads) (Modern Au)

Alexander is a jealos lil kid

Alexander's POV

Alexander heard what had happened to Lafayette and he was furies.
What was even more annoying to him was that he didn't even hear about it from Lafayette. Rather from John.
John had calmed down and forgave Alexander about calling him a cheater. But they weren't together. They had broken up.
Alexander was sitting by his window in his dorm room.
Washington had decided that Alexander was allowed to have a dorm at the college. He had been obeying the rules that well.
Alexander was thankful of it, because the safehouse was a terrible place.
He was writing his feelings down in a journal kinda thing he had been given.
He was writing about how he felt about his friends, other people, his family, school and basically everything around him.
Someone had offered him drugs the other day, but he didn't except them.
He wrote about Thomas. He had feelings for him. Strong feelings.
And he hated having those feelings.
He closed the journal and glanced at an empty beer can on his table.
Washington had told him not to touch alcohol, but what could he do? Someone had to drink the ones that were still left in his fridge.
He threw the can away and put on his shoes, took his phone and keys and went out his dorm.
Some students were scared of Alexander. Some liked to pick on him.
Eliza was definitely not one of them. She was lingering around Alex 24/7.
And that was the first person Alexander saw when he walked out.
Eliza and her sister Angelica immediately blushed when they saw him. Their sister Peggy just rolled her eyes at them.
"Hey girls." Alexander said putting his hood over his head.
Eliza frowned. "Come on, we wanna see your face, Alex."
"No you don't..I haven't slept well in few days and I feel dead inside."
"Stop sounding like an emo girl from the 2000s." Peggy said and lifted the hood away. "Oh you really do look awful-"
Angelica pulled Peggy away. "Sorry about her. She can be a little annoying at times."
Alexander shrugged. "It's ok."
Eliza cupped his cheek. "Have you drank again? Or smoked?"
Alex nodded. "Sorry."
"You know drinking at this age isn't good."
"Meh. I've seen you drink so don't comment about what I do." Alexander walked past them.
Eliza looked down. "Oh.."
He felt bad, but like always, he ignored the feelings. Because what was the use of feeling sad or happy or angry when all that did was cost trouble.
Alexander made his way to Thomas' dorm and knocked on the door. James opened it and said hello.
Alexander walked inside without saying hello back. He just wanted to see Lafayette.
He heard Laf talk to John.
*What is he doing here?*
He walked towards the voices. They came from Laf's bedroom.
Laf and John were sitting on Laf's bed and cuddling.
John was telling Laf how everything was going to be fine and he didn't have to fear. Laf was cuddeling into John's neck and smiling.
Alexander looked at James. "Have they been doing that for long?"
James nodded. "Like, 20 minutes." He limped back on their couch.
*Am I high or did James have hickeys and limp..DAMN THOMAS-*
I brushed it off because it wasn't my duty to worry about what Thomas and James do together. I opened the bedroom door and John and Laf stopped. They awkwardly waved at Alexander.
He raised his eyebrows. "What is this? Why are you cuddling?"
John blushed and looked away. "It's nothing Alex."
"It's not? Because it looks like something to me." Alexander pulled John on his feet. John's eyes widened. "What did I do?"
"Did you really replace me this quickly..?" Alexander asked sadly.
"N-no..But we broke up, so it doesn't matter." John looked at Lafayette. He was fidgeting his fingers. "Alex, believe him. There's nothing between us."
Alexander let go of John. "Oh." He went out of the room and saw Thomas and James have a romantic moment (aka kissing and cuddling) on the couch. He felt empty. *God damn..* "Hey, I'm leaving now!"
James nodded and came to open the door for Alexander. "That was a quick visit."
"There was nothing to see."
"Wow, thanks."
Alexander huffed and ran outside of the dorm building. A tear fell down his cheek. No one cared about him. Of course John would replace him this quickly, because why would anyone want to be with him?
He remembered Eliza. If only he loved her back..
But all he did was be jealous about James and Thomas..