You don't care if there's anything happening anymore. The time of realizing things and movements happening straight before your eyes is over, because why should you have motivation for things that aren't worth looking at? It's always the same and you're getting tired of this repition and the same stuff everyday. You're getting tired of this life. And that's the first point: You can't see it anymore. You can't see with those eyes given to you from the first breath at your birth, those eyes which first catched sight of your mother what is kinda funny, because that was the person who first gave you those eyes. But time passes by and by time you start to wonder what the point anymore is because everything you see is old.When you where born, you catched sight of this new life with new things. Somehow, it's not even a new life anymore so why should you even have the motivation to do anything anymore and most likely, look at stuff? Care about stuff? Think about stuff? What is the point and what does it change in your life as you already recognized there's nothing changing? So you start to care less and less, maybe also because you know otherwise you would drown in insecurity and sadness, and that's not worth it because you won't give neverchanging life the chance to depress you as well as it will break you. It might seem like not caring is the best opportunity. Hiding from the truth, holding back the feelings grumbling in your stomach. That way, you don't have to handle them. Sure thing. As if they would go always just because you don't admit you have and feel them. And that's even more unfair, a life without new moments, collecting no new things and memories being unable to give you good feelings but bad. Seems like the only opportunity is to not care. So it only lies in the nature of man, it's only human. But at this point you can think about it. Because if this is only human, how are you supposed to feel dissapointed at yourself for feeling it but also life to be happening like that? If it is only human? If it's humidity, you know it's normal. And maybe then, you wouldn't feel that bad anymore.
