The Wolves Howling In My Head

Villain

Why do I feel like the bad guy?
My mind insists I did nothing wrong,
But my heart tells me otherwise.

Why do I blame myself?

My mind recognizes that it was all out of my control,
There was nothing that could be done.

It was her decision not mine.

My heart insists there was some way this could've been prevented.
Should've loved her more.

Though that's impossible to do.

I weep,
I wail,
And I feel guilt.

All for something that wasn't my fault.

I want to apologise,
For what,
I don't know.

For not being enough for you?

I simply don't know why.
I try so hard in vain,
Yet still feel like a villain.

Why could I not satisfy you?

I've been having good days again,
And I resent them.
Although you consistently have them.

I don't deserve them.

This shouldn't be a problem,
I should take no blame,
Yet I insist to take it.

Because for some reason,
I insist on being the villain.
The sabatour of my own story,

Though I did nothing of fault.