#156 Seven Dates A Weekend

16 3 1

by xanabanana66x

by xanabanana66x

Seven Dates a Weekend by @riveting-

When you have a noun or an adjective and then follow that with a gerund, you need a hyphen in between. Like:

Sweet-smelling
Tired-looking

Dialogue formatted incorrectly. Please see my examples and corrections for this.

Commas before names.

I found the main character really annoying. I don't know if you did this on purpose but I guess everyone has a different opinion.

Henna/Hena (we already established it) :)

Numbers spelled out look more formal.

Overall, a fantastic start. Nothing else apart from grammar to point out!

Remember that this is a critique, NOT a criticism. Please spread the word!

If you would like a critique, please read the guidelines, fill out the form, and complete the payment, all which can be found at the beginning of this book. :)