Sander Sides Ship Oneshots

Remuses' guide to hooking up your boyfriends [Part 1/?]

This one shot I wrote as I got ideas! Fun fun stuff :>

Btw I haven't had a phone for a whole week cuz my old one fuggin died lmao

Warnings for: Sexual undertones, inappropriate talk, strong language, teasing, undressing, kissing and safe-wording.

Word count: 756

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"'Anxiety, what aren't you doing in my room?"'

Virgil spun on his heel. In the doorway was Deceit. He crossed his arms disapprovingly. Virgil huffed.

"I was looking for my hoodie you stole, dumbass."

He turned around to continue searching. He saw the shadow of Deceit move closer. Virgil didn't care, finally spotting his tattered purple hoodie tucked under Deceits pillow. He knew why it was there, but he'd play coy if asked.

He grabbed it then was grabbed, spun and pushed against the edge of the bed. Virgil stared into Deceits malevolent eyes. One was brown, the other was yellow. The snake side leaned over the anxious one, glowering.

Virgils eyebrows climbed and he was silent for a long moment.

"..so.. aren't you gonna kiss me?"

Virgil asked and Deceit gasped in shock, throwing Virgil onto the bed then backing up, a look of surprise and bewilderment on his face.

"'Oh, gross!"'

He yelped, making an offended gesture with his hands. Virgil snorted, relaxing as he slipped on his hoodie over the tank top he was wearing.

"Aight, guess that's a no."

He said with a shrug.

"Have fun fuckin Remus."

Deceit glared.

"'I won't! Don't have fun fucking Remus!"'

He spat and Virgil was amused, shaking his head as he left the room. He skipped over to his boyfriends room, opening the door without a care.

Remus sat up.

'Eh?? Oh, my darling princess! How is my sweet little ball of sunshine doing~?'

He asked, expression lighting up at seeing Virgil. Virgil rolled his eyes, flopping onto the bed beside him.

"Ah, I'm tired of life right now. Deceit is continuing to ignore my flirts! You said he liiiiiked me."

He whined and Remus rolled his eyes.

'He does! He's just a total tsundere!'

"A.. thunder?"

'No, a tsundere. That means he's completely shy and in denial to the fact he likes you. I know he does! But I have an idea..'

He gestured Virgil closer, then whispered his plan into his ear.

'Now go in there, and get in those pants!'

Remus encouraged, leaning back onto his arms. Virgil liked the idea, and he smiled brightly.

"Love you babe. I'll go fuck the snake."

'Yeah! Go get him! I uh, love you too.'

He added on, embarrassed.

Virgil left the room again without another word, thinking about Remus.

The side was totally casual about sex and passionate acts of love, but when approached with simple displays of affection like holding hands or compliments, he froze up! He'd blush red and would be speechless and stuttering for several hours..

Virgil returned to Deceits room. Remus followed. He glanced back then rolled his eyes, smirking.

Virgil threw the door wide open, waltzing inside.

Deceit yelped in surprise, backing up as Virgil flopped onto the bed. Remus followed and locked the door. Deceit stared at the two one at a time, eyes wide.

"'W- what, what aren't you two doing in here?!"'

He asked in surprise.

'Oh, we're just paying a visit, baby boy.'

Remus murmured, walking over to Deceit and kissing him. His boyfriend kissed back, snaking an arm around his waist slowly. Remus rubbed his thigh between Deceits legs. Deceits grip tightened and a noise was pressed into the kiss.

When they separated Deceit was blushing bright red, sputtering. Remus traced a finger over his jawline.

'Hm? Oh, I'm just wondering.. why haven't you confessed to Verge already? Once you two finally fuck and start dating, we can officially make this a three way.'

"You mean a poly?"

Virgil piped up and the two glanced at him. The anxious side had removed his jacket, smiling as he moved to pull off his tank top.

Deceit realized what was happening.

"'B- but- I don't like him! I don't like Virgil!"'

'You speak in lies, dearie. Please tell me what Verges' iconic color is.'

"'..green?"'

Deceit offered hopefully. Remus snorted and rolled his eyes.

'No, that's mine. And you wanna know what else is mine?'

Virgil grinned, swinging his legs as he watched them with interest. Deceit was unable to calm the tones of pink on his face.

"'V- Virgil?"'

'Yes. And you. You're both mine, but I know you two will be a fit for each other, as well. Now do you remember your safe word?'

"'..it's not Tree."'

"Mine is Spider."

Remus grinned.

'And my safe word is Nonexistent. Now.. shall we begin?'

Virgil nodded enthusiastically and Deceit hesitantly agreed. This would be one hell of an evening..

[To Be Continued In Part 2!]