The chime from my phone tore me away from my book. I glanced over to see a text from Lando.
I've landed, you busy?
I sighed and went back to my book. Lando and I had been talking for a couple months and things were going well. I was hesitant though, I had a lot of shit that I'd had gone through when I was younger and I hadn't told him any of it yet. Usually when I opened up to people about my past they'd bugger off soon afterwards; not wanting to put up with any of it. I didn't want Lando to run away too. I didn't want his view of me to change.
Lately Lando's been trying to suggest that we officially date and I wasn't ready for that, not without telling him about my past. It wouldn't be fair on him.
After I'd read a couple more chapters my phone buzzed again.
Is everything okay?
I'm fine, just busy. Sorry the race didn't go better.
I put my phone down and went into the kitchen to sort myself out some dinner. I made some tuna mayo pasta and ate it at the kitchen table as I continued my book, determined to finish it before I went to bed. I was washing up the dishes when a knock came from the front door. I dried my hands on my trousers as I walked over to the door, not expecting to see a tired looking driver on my front porch.
Even through the bags under his eyes made him look like a panda, he still flashed a warm smile that could wash away any sadness.
"W-what are you doing here?"
"I missed you... and something seemed up with you. Wanted to make sure you were okay." His eyes flickered from mine to his feet, his hands fiddling with the hem of his t-shirt, subconsciously pulling out the threading. Guilt washed over my body, he looked exhausted and because of me he was standing in my doorway instead of relaxing.
"I'm sorry, I'm fine. You should've gone to rest, you must be really jet lagged." He flashed that smile again and chuckled.
"Don't be silly. D-do you mind if I come in?" I moved out of the way to let him into the house, closing the door behind him.
I made myself a coffee and a glass of milk for Lando, who was sat on the counter, swinging his legs like a small child. He thanked me for the drink before pulling me in between his legs, engulfing me into a bear hug. I wrapped my arms around his waist, his legs wrapping around mine. I hurried my face into his neck, his cologne filling my nostrils, I didn't know how to describe it, apart from saying it smelt like true happiness.
We stayed like that for a few minutes, in a comforting silence. His hand rubbed small circles on my back.
"What's been up with you lately? Did I do something wrong? Upset you?" I looked up at him and shook my head. He shuffled off the counter and sat on the kitchen floor, motioning for me to sit next to him. He slipped his fingers into mine before giving it a gentle squeeze.
"Talk to me... cause you're not okay and it's seems like you're getting more and more distant by the day and... I really like you (Y/N) and I don't want to lose you. I only just found you, my one of a kind. Whatever it is we can fix it or I can help." I closed my eyes and tightened my grip on his hand.
I didn't know where to start, what was worth saying and what wasn't. My heart began to beat a little faster, my breathing becoming shorter. I knew as soon as I'd open my mouth he would realise the mistake he made and would be out of the house quicker than I'd be able to react. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.
"I haven't told you much about my family because it's a bit of a mess and I didn't want to scare you off or overwhelm you. I don't want you to see me differently." Landos eyes were obviously sad, but he gave a soft smile. A comforting smile. He gave a small nod as if to tell me to continue.
"When I was twelve... my dad took his own life and it broke the whole family. After his funeral his side of the family cut me off, said I reminded them too much of him. It is what it is, I just miss the kids, some of them don't even remember me. It can be tough and I can get quite low from it, it can get quite intense and... I just didn't want to to think I'm a train wreck or something." Lando pressed a small kiss tot the side of my head.
"Impossible," he whispered, "I see a strong, brave woman who doesn't let anything stop her. You don't have to hide anything from me, I'm gonna be by your side through all of it. If you want to cry or vent or just need a distraction; I am always here. Even if its a race weekend, I'm only a call away." Tears began to for in my eyes. I flung my leg over him so I was straddling his lap and hugged him. He held me tight, as if I would disappear if he let go.
"Can I kiss you?" he whispered, as if he was scared that I'd hear him. I stared at his big beautiful eyes before leaning forward and pressing my lips against his. He rested one hand on the small of my back and the other cupping my cheek. As we pulled apart a large grin started to spread across his face.
"Does this mean I can finally call you my girlfriend?" I let out a small giggle and nodded.
"I don't see why not." I didn't think it was possible but his smile had gotten even bigger. He stood up, picking me up with him, I wrapped my legs around his waist, locking my ankles together. He spun us around before peppering my face with kisses.
"Now, I wanna hear everything about Suzuka." He carried us to my room and we spent the night cuddling and chatting about anything and everything we could think of. I couldn't help but smile whenever he spoke, he was my one of a kind.
