Say something. (Y/N) started to panic. Every inch of her body seemed to freeze at the view of his presence. The Joker was here. In front of her. Smiling.
As he came closer to her, the freeze even intensified. A wave of embarrassment rushed over her. All these thoughts from before hunted her in her mind, she felt like a child. He slowly moved his way to her. (Y/N)
didn't want to realize it, but he looked nervous too.
The Joker wanted to say something. Something about her being new and that he wanted to welcome her. But something stopped him. There was a tingle in his hands, and the Joker knew what was next. He tried to fight against it, but failed. No. Not know. Not in front of her. "I'm...", he started but as he felt the laughter swell up in his throat, it crashed down.
(Y/N) didn't know what to do. She saw him laughing. She heard him laughing. But she felt something different. There was nothing funny about anything. He's suffering. Even though, she wasn't sure, there was something very special about his maniac, insane and forced laugh. It was special, but not in a good way. So she let her freeze melt from the tension and the sudden desire to walk up to him, hold him, take care of him took over and she did.
The Joker felt terrible. Embarrassed. Tired. Sick. Laughs came out of his mouth, like bullets out of a gun. And he couldn't stop it. Couldn't control it. Tears welled up in his eyes. He was crying again. In front of a beautiful woman.
"Shhh, it's ok."
Angel-like. Her voice was angel-like, as she tried to calm him. Her touch was angel-like, as she put his head in between her hands. Her eyes were angel-like, as she looked at him with a worried but caring expression. A single tear rolled down his cheek, and she wiped it away with her beautiful hands. The Joker was so stunned by this goddess him front of him, that he didn't even notice that he stopped laughing.
His makeup got a little smudged as (Y/N) wiped his tears away. Even without the white paint, he was very pale. Probably probably because of his attack. He looks frightened, but remained calm. He placed his hands over hers and slowed his breath. A bolt of butterflies shot through (Y/N)'s Body. So this is what physical contact did to her. She loved it. She loved him.
"Tha-ha-ha..."
"You're very much welcome.", (Y/N) spokes over his stutter.
"I'm (Y/N), (Y/N) (Y/L/N).", the Joker heard her say.
I love you, he nearly answered. But fortunately he didn't. Unfortunately, he didn't know what to answer at all.
So he just took in all of the beauty, that was in front of him. He analysed every single thing about all of her features, and once again got reminded of how beautiful she was.
Paul stayed silent, but something threw him off. He liked her. The Joker really fell in love. It wasn't very hard to see that, they were practically dying to get close. Was it anger? Was it jealousy? He didn't know. But what he knew, is that something was going to happen. And that the Joker wouldn't enjoy it.
"So I'm guessing that you're the Joker.", (Y/N) asked him.
"Paul exit the room."
Paul didn't know if he heard it right. So he stood there, confused and shook.
"But boss I-"
"I said-", the Joker turned his head to the side and looked furiously at his Assistant. Paul rememberd that the Joker didn't like to repeat himself. So he exited the room, and was left alone with his thoughts. Hateful thoughts.
The door closed and (Y/N) and the Joker were left alone. Suddenly, the Joker grabbed both of her hands again.
"Hello (Y/N).", he said with the warmest, sincerest and sweet voice, and (Y/N) just wanted to baby him.
She realized something. Behind all this make-up, behind all the violence, the weapons. Behind the Joker. There was another person. A person, that wanted to someone to walk up to him, hold him, take care of him. A person that wanted to be loved. Let me be that person.
"You know, people always refer to me as the Joker, and they are right, I am the Joker. But you are an exeption" , he explained to her while holding her hands tight.
(Y/N) got the chills. His voice, his words sent shivers down her spine.
"The Joker is the leader of the rebellion. But people like you bring out...dare I say the better other side of me." The Joker didn't really know what he was saying. It was like someone took over. And that someone was no other than-
"Arthur. Arthur Fleck."
Everything made sense now. For some reason. (Y/N) smiled.
"Nice to meet you, Arthur."
"You are one of the few people that get to know me as Arthur. It wouldn't be special anymore, if everyone knew."
(Y/N) nodded, understanding what he wanted to say.
"Of course."
Arthur smiled. He felt that his legs were getting shaky. Chair. I need to sit. The sudden feel of excitement overwhelmed him. She was driving him crazy. So he searched for the nearest Chair and eventually sat down. He tried to hold his legs down, but failed at stopping them to shake. The self hatred in him started to rise again and he felt as if the laughter was going to return. Until he felt a touch on his knee.
"It's ok, Arthur."
"No it is not.", he blurted out. But as he saw the worried expression on (Y/N)'s Face, he immediately regretted it.
"Do you want to talk about it?", She asked innocently. Arthur laughed. Do you want to talk about it? How many psychatrists have tried to do it. They all failed, obviously.
"I'm not very good when it comes to talk about my feelings.", he joked around.
(Y/N) thought about it, and came to an idea in seconds.
"Well, to make it easier for you: it's easier if you tell it in metaphors. Such as the weather.", she started to explain, calm and genuinely trying to help. "Many people think that rain is depressing. Weather is often linked with emotions. Such as sunny weather is a happy wather. Or stormy weather is angry weather."
Arthur listened to her and got fascinated once again. Her intelligence was outraging and her words all made sense. Arthur started to think that she was better than every psychiatrist he has ever had. So he smiled and continued listening to her. He could do it for days.
"For example, today, the sun rose up. I was excited. Today is a sunny day. I'm content and...", she looked him deep in his blue eyes, "...happy."
Arthur listened, and he understood.
"So I'm asking you", she came closer, kneeled in front of him and asked:
"How's the weather, Arthur?"
And Arthur smiled even wider and answered without thinking:
"Today is a sunny day. A sunny day in the middle of July."
And they both smiled as the rain from outside poured on the windows.
