Beautiful Mistake

Chapter Two

Chapter Two

Becca's POV

"How are you doing?" Ashley asked as we finally found a quiet place to sit. A small field that was on the Cullen property.

"Honestly? Not great." I admitted. "Everything is so overwhelming. It feels like-" I trailed off not knowing exactly how to put it.

"Like you're coming out of a haze and everything you did is now hitting you all at once?" Ashley asked and I nodded.

"Exactly." I said.

"That's how bloodlust is for me." She said.

"But it wasn't just any ole blood I lust for. It's specifically vampire venom. Direct for the veins. It's like a drug and my personality did a complete 180." I said sighing looking at my hands. I felt defeated. The Volturi did exactly what they said they were gonna do. They broke me and made me into their weapon. I hated that. I fought so long for it not to happen.

"How am I supposed to bring a baby into this world and not mess it up? I was a mess in my human life. I am a literal mess now. A baby?" I was so worried about this. "I know Alec would support me in any decision I made. I always wanted kids but that was when I was human. What the hell am I gonna do?"

"That's something you have to decide. Let's just get to the check-up. You can decide what to do after that." Ashley said, putting her hand on mine. "So tell me about Alec. How did this happen? Last I heard, he and Jane were joined at the hip."

"It started as just hookups." I smiled. "After they let me out of the cells, that is. Somewhere after that we fell in love. Him first of course. I've never been too good with love." I said and looked off in the distance. My history with love has never turned out well. Jake and Jamie. Maybe it's guys with J names.

"You and me both sister." Ashley said looking down at her hands. I had forgotten. She had a crush on another certain J named guy.

"Why is love so hard?" I ask.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"Just the whole aspect of love. It's so hard. There's always some obstacles in the way of true happiness." I explained. "The Volturi are a prideful coven and can come after us at anytime and I'm in a house full of obstacles. I feel like almost everyone in this house hates me."

"Becca, they don't hate you." Ashley said grabbing my hand.

"I feel like they do, like they're against me. Every instinct in me is to run and I feel like I'm always on my toes waiting for someone to attack me." I said. Even now with Ashley who I trust with my life and I logically know she'd never attack me. My skin is crawling, screaming at me that she was a danger.

"It's the trauma of what you've been through." She explained.

"Ashley, you don't think I know that?" I asked. "Everything that has happened to me since I woke up as this twisted hybrid has gotten to this point. Everything that has happened to me since I was born has traumatized me. Every time there is something good in my life, it's ruined and I'm just waiting for that to happen this time."

"Becca." Ashley said and I could hear the pity in her voice. I pulled away and stood up. I walked a few feet away.

"I don't need your pity Ashley." I spit out. "Nothing in my life stays good forever. The other shoes always drops. There's this darkness inside of me and I'm so afraid that it's gonna consume me and everything else in my life."

"I don't pity you, I sympathize. You've been through a lot." Ashley said, slowly standing up. She kept her moves at a human pace, to not set me off. My heart beat was racing fast and all my instincts told me to run to safety. My dark emotions causing everything to go haywire.