"kiss me" • stenbrough

Fourteen

    despite how crazy everything was with finding georgie, i still wasn't all that excited about going back to school. sure, it would help make me feel a little more normal, but stress from grades just wasn't something i needed at all. plus, there would be tons of kids, asking me about how i found him, why i did it... and worst of all, richie tozier.

    as soon as i walked through the front doors i got stared at. i remembered the news, the article they put in the newspaper, referring to me as some kind of psychic. i knew i should be happy about finding georgie and actually having that dream, but it felt both too real and not real enough for me. like he was still somewhere out there, yet in my house at the same time.

    for the past week all i did was lay in bed to write, and talk to stan. those were the only things i really enjoyed doing anymore. georgie had spent his week with tons of friends over, some rambunctious kids from his class that just had to be at our house of all places. but stanley was helping me, he was the only friend i had at this point. i'd ignored richie and all of the texts and calls and times he asked to come over. i felt a little bad for it, but i needed my space. he was annoying, too, and i knew he wouldn't ever understand me like stanley did.

•

    "bill, hey, can we talk?"

    i'd been expecting stanley's voice, but instead i got richie's. dismayed, i nodded my head as he sat down next to me. there was no saying no to richie, at least not in person. he'd annoy you or guilt you into finally talking to him.

    "do you hate me?"

    he looked over at me with genuine concern and hurt in his face. why was he asking this? richie knew how i was. he knew i liked to be alone, i'd ignored him plenty of times before. but i wasn't really alone if i'd been with stanley the whole time, was i?

    richie was probably feeling jealous, or so i figured. "i w-wuh-wah-wanted to be left alone," i explained briefly, feeling relieved when stanley finally sat down on the other side of me. he would explain for me.

    they looked at each other for a while. stanley was the first to stop staring, looking down at his tray to unwrap his baked potato. "he bothering you?" he asked calmly, flattening the tinfoil down on his lunchtray. he grabbed a spoon and cut the potato in two, not seeming particularly concerned with anything.

    "n-no, he's f-"

    "bill's my best friend, man. if anyone's bothering him, it's you."

    richie's sentence made me feel shitty. did he not remember all the times i left him on read? this guy really just couldn't take a hint. stanley was definitely my best friend at this point, no doubt about it. not him. i noticed movement on stanley's side of the table. he was looking at richie now, eyebrows raised. "he doesn't seem too thrilled to see you."

    "you know what? fuck you. stand up, i'm done with your shit." richie threw his chair back and walked around the table, past me, to get to stanley. stanley stood up almost just as fast as richie, taking a few steps back in self defense. stanley didn't seem scared, but he should've been scared. i knew that all too well.

    i stood up, trying to get between them, trying to intervene, but it was no use. richie had already shoved stanley to the ground, and was getting ready to gut him before a principal started dragging him off.

    stanley laid on the ground. i couldn't exactly put an emotion to the look on his face- he kind of just looked unphased. that surprised me, because if i were laying on the ground after taking a couple hits from richie, i would be crying my ass off. richie was skinny, but that didn't mean he couldn't put up a fight.

    i helped stanley get to his feet as the principals took richie away. we made eye contact, not saying anything until stanley finally broke the silence.

    "bet you twenty bucks richie has a crush on you."

    "huh?"

    "richie likes you," he repeated, looking me in the eye intently.

    my jaw hung open for a bit in disbelief. "he t-tuh-teh-tell you thuh-that?"

    "no, i can just tell. do you like him?"

    i looked away and stared at the ground. why did stanley think richie liked me? was it his outburst, the constant notifications i'd get while i simply ignored him or put my phone on silent? i looked back at stanley again, the idea wasn't too far fetched, but there was someone else i'd much rather have than goddamn richie.

    "well, n-nuh-no- i like suh-someone e-eh-eh-else."

    he didn't have a way to reply to that, apparently, because he just gave me a knowing grin and sat back down at the lunch table.

•

    i managed to get through one whole day of school without strangling myself. stanley and i walked home in silence. not angry silence, but more like... understanding silence. content silence. well, that was until richie pushed in between us and shoved stanley to the side. we were off school grounds, so nobody but us could tell him shit about it.

    he grabbed my hand and took me down a street with small but nice houses. i didn't object, i knew richie wouldn't do anything to me. and i was curious. we wound up underneath a bridge. it wasn't the kissing bridge. the kissing bridge was way jankier.

    richie took my other hand and looked me in the face. i had the suspicion that stanley was somewhere around the bridge, intent on listening to whatever richie was going to say or do to me. i trusted richie to not beat the shit out of me, i just didn't like him around stan.

    "bill, you know what i'm 'bout to say, right?"

    i shook my head no, but i had a clue. was stan right? he probably was, stanley had a feeling for... those type of things. oh god, if stanley could tell richie liked me, could he tell i liked him...?

    "well, i love you. i don't expect you to like me back or be gay too or whatever. just know. and i'll always be here for you." richie let go of my hand, walking away from me and never looking back.

    i made my way out from underneath the bridge, thinking things over. that confession was obviously rushed. stanley wasn't right, after all. it was a dare. richie was known for doing things like that.

    then i changed my mind. it was too authentic, i could tell by the way he looked at me that he wasn't lying or making things up... the back of my throat burned, i felt so guilty for ignoring him and making excuses for it. there was no excuse. richie was my friend and i'd treated him like shit.

    i spotted stanley nearby, he had definitely been listening to our conversation. stanley had that same cold, unphased look, similar to the one he had after richie pushed him down. i wondered what it meant when he made that look. was he upset? or trying to hide what he was really feeling beneath it?

    we continued our silent walk home. i guess we both had important things on our minds.

((hope you enjoyed those three whole frickin' timeskips! sorry if my writing style is different or you don't like it, but i'm doin' my best here. chapter 15 will come out next monday if my life is together.))