Total Harmony [Under Construction]

Prologue~ A Time For Goodbye

 I stare up at Lennox. My boyfriend. Though, I don’t know how he is my boyfriend. I mean, come on. He’s good looking, with dark brown hair and amazing emerald green eyes, he’s smart, he plays sports, and he’s also two years older. I have no idea about how I was the one he picked when there are so many other girls, so many girls that are way pretty than me. The girls in his year, are well, blonde bimbos, but attractive nonetheless. The popular guys date the pretty blonde cheerleaders. The ones who don’t mind if they look like sluts.

Lennox, I don’t know how, happened to pick me. To love me. Not the blondes that he could so easily get. Well, he could get any girl, it didn’t have to be a blonde. But they’re the majority of the school’s female populace, they’re the girls who are the most interested in him. But he wasn’t interested in them. He was interested in me. So how come now, as I stare into his eyes all I see is guilt.

“Sav,” he sighs. “My Savvy Savannah.” I try to smile, but I can’t. The guilt is shining in his eyes and I feel like crying. He’s said my name and I can already feel my eyes water. I look away. I don’t want him to see me crying. Sure, he has before but it’s not the same now. I’m crying because of him. Because the inevitable is about to happen. I can’t prevent it.

I don’t know what I did though. I mean, I thought I was a good girlfriend. I thought he loved me.

“P-please don’t say what I think you’re about to say. Please don’t say that. Please don’t tell me you’ve had enough. Don’t tell me you’re leaving me. Don’t tell me you’re sorry.” I look up at him, my eyes blazing with both anger and sadness. Now, I let the tears fall. “You said we were forever. You said you loved me. You didn’t tell me you’d say goodbye. You didn’t tell me I wasn’t good enough.” I sob.

“Why did you come talk to me? Why did you let me fall for you in the first place? You know what I’ve been through. You know how hard my life has been for the past couple of years. Why would you add to that? Why is it that you hurt me so much, but yet I know that I’ll still love you? I know that you’re going to leave me now, and I won’t be able to do anything about it. Please, just leave. I really don’t want your apology.” I wipe my eyes, probably smudging my makeup. I don’t care though. My makeup is not what’s important right now.

“Savannah, I’m not leaving you for another girl.” I glare at him. “Sav, I love you…”

“Don’t say that,” I interrupt him, anger the only prominent emotion in my tone.

“Savvy, just listen. I don’t want any other girl. I’m not leaving you for another girl. I’m leaving you for my career. 2LC has finally been recognised. They finally noticed us. We’re being flown over tomorrow. Isn’t this great?” Even though this is great for him, I don’t feel happy. Why would I? He’s leaving me. He doesn’t care about me. If he really cared about me then he’d know how I felt. He wouldn’t act like an ass, he’d be more sensitive.

Then there’s the fact that I’ll probably never see him again. Next time I do, he’ll be in a magazine or on the TV with a whore attached to his hip. He’ll be in his own little perfect world. And I’ll be sitting at home with a secret.

I know I should be happy for him, he’s wanted this his whole life. Well, that’s what he told me. And I really should tell him the thing I’ve tried so hard to keep to myself, but that’ll stop him from leaving. Do I want to stop him from leaving? Yes and no. Yes because I love him. No, because then he’ll regret not leaving.

“Sav, I’m sorry but I have to go. I need to pack for my flight.” I nod my head, not looking at him. “Sav, look at me,” he sighs. He cups my chin and turns my face to his. “I will come back. I love you so don’t think for a second that you don’t mean anything to me. I’m coming back for you. I don’t know when, but I will. Just remember that. I promise I will.”

It sounds like a broken promise. Something to reassure me with. Something to shut me up with.

“You know what?” I say, my voice cold and distant. I don’t wait for him to reply. “It’s amazing how someone can break your heart, and yet you still love them with every broken piece.”

Again, I don’t wait for his reply. My head hurts and my throat feels raw. I get out of his car that sits idly on the curb in front of my two storey house. I turn around one last time, uttering the words “goodbye, Lennox.” Though I know he cannot hear me, my voice is barely above a whisper. I can’t see his face through the black tinted windows but I know there is still guilt there. He waits for me to get in my house, just like he used to do everytime he was dropping me home from his house, or if we were on a date. When I shut the door behind me I hear the engine of his beat up old car revving, and then driving away.

I crumple down onto the floor in a ball. I can no longer hold in my tears. I had tried so hard to not let him see me cry. He did though. But they quickly turned into tears of anger. These are not tears of anger now. They’re full of complete sadness. Sadness because I’m alone. Because I’m heartbroken. But mostly because now I have a job to do. And I’ll be doing all alone. Without Lennox. The one who I really thought would have my back.

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Awesome cover made by @MidnightPotion :)