Apotheosis- A TGWDLM Fanfic

Chapter Nine: Words Fail

Once again, Emma and Harriet were stuck in silence. But this silence was much more grave than the last time. Harriet knew she'd done nothing wrong. Or at least she didn't think she had. This was Emma, being in pain. And Harriet has no clue what to say. She was left just walking in silence beside her friend. She wanted so much to comfort her. To let he know that she was there, ready to be whatever Emma needed. That she didn't mind being cried on, or ranted to, or even beaten up if that was what Emma needed. But she could never find the words for the important things. The things she needed to say. God, she had so much bottled up inside her. She'd sacrificed so much, and she knew that in order to reach her goal, she'd need to sacrifice more. At least now she had a friend to rely on. They had decided to rely on each other, and Harriet now couldn't imagine doing this without her. She just... she wanted Emma to know how much she meant to her. But... well, in the wise words of a very socially awkward young liar, words fail! Thoughts were flooding Harriet's head as she tried to keep up with Emma. Finally, Emma stopped dead in her tracks and pivoted to face Harriet.

"Aren't you going to say something?" She asked, in a fluster.

"I..." Harriet started.

"I just watched you make out with the man I loved, Harriet! I fucking killed him for you!" She spat. "Why the fuck did I do that?"

"How the hell should I know?" Harriet quirked a brow. She sighed. She'd fucked that one up. Time to try to redeem herself. "Look, if it's any consolation at all, I didn't want to kiss him."

"You looked like you did." She scoffed.

"It's the apotheosis and I didn't have my headpiece." Harriet reasoned defensively. "I'm not interested in Paul. Or I wasn't, I suppose. I don't know why you killed him. That's something only you can answer. But... I'll forever be grateful that you gave me the chance to live."

"Harry..." She breathed before beginning to sob hysterically, latching onto Harriet. Harriet tensed at the unexpected affection. But she soon relaxed and pulled Emma close to her, holding her tightly. "God, I hate this... I'm such a dumb bitch, forming emotional attachments."

"You're not a dumb bitch... you're simply human." Harriet soothed.

"Sometimes I wish this could all just be over. That I could surrender to them." She groaned, still sobbing. "Life would be so much fucking easier!"

"Don't say that." Harriet chided. "Once you give up in your head, you're as good as dead."

"I know, I know..." she sniffed. She continued to sob. "I'm so glad I don't have to do this alone."

"I am too." Harriet sighed. "I understand where you're coming from, though. I wish so damn much that I could be back in my Uncle's arms. Do you know how good that felt? For the first time in what seems like forever, everything felt normal..."

"Normally I'd laugh because this is all anything BUT normal... but I felt the same way around Paul." Emma nodded, pulling away from the hug. "You know, I don't think I've got it so bad, though."

"Why's that?" Harriet quirked a brow.

"Because I also feel that way around you." Emma told her, looking down at the ground.

"I... don't know what to say." Harriet chuckled nervously. "I consider you to be like family too."

"Yeah... that's what I meant." Emma chuckled sadly. "Family..."

"The fact that you just said that makes me think that you didn't." Harriet blinked, trying to figure out what she was missing. "You know you can talk to me about anything, right?"

"Not this." Emma laughed.

"Why not?" Harriet asked. "Have I made you uncomfortable in some way?"