Behind my smile (UNDER EDITING.)

"Hope you rot in Hell" (10)

"how are you?" Caleb asks me, sitting on a tree his brown hair covering hes face its like he knew i was here without looking for me, i sigh and shrug, the normal you know? depressed and all that things. "Hayley i asked you something!"he yells at me, i jump back and nod my head hesitantly.

"er--well i haven't been better at all actually"i sigh, being honest is way harder than lying to people and i don't know if that's good or bad ,i'm not going to lie, something isn't very right. Caleb is nice then out of nowhere he lashes out at me, i don't get it, and every time he says does lash out he says this:

"this isn't Caleb. its the Caleb you created in your head, stop thinking like that" i don't understand what the means, am i just making this whole Caleb in my head that causes these nightmares or is HE just messing with MY head? "YOU STUPID GIRL!" i hear Caleb yell, i look up only to see him disappear from the tree. i look around paranoid, where is he? oh my god, not again not this .Its happend before, he goes away somewhere then comes back with this whole different...evil Caleb. and i hate that Caleb, he makes me sick, makes me want to die more than i already do. and that's a big thing.

i scream.

"surprise!" Caleb laughs, pointing at the lifeless body in front of me, i look at him in horror. "what? you don't like my gift?" he stares at me mockingly, "well mama said even if you don't like your gift you have to take and appreciate it anyway" his normal honey sweet brown eyes stare at me but instead its this dark, broken, evil eyes that stare back at me.

I miss home.

Home with him, home with my older brother, that caring loving person, and that family that wasn't so broken before. Maryland, the house, gymnastic, friends, just everything i miss everything, including he's warm craving hugs. "Caleb! what did you do!" i cry, the body twitching at times as the eyes lay closed, her blue beautiful eyes.

"What? nothing really, shes just...gone" he shrugs and stares at he two, not the way he used too, now its more why'd you let go? i hate you! , it used to be be my girl please? your all i need. you probably guessed who it is by now, the perfect girl that my brother fell in love with. "Sydney" i cry out leaning towards her body, my heart aches, way more than normal. "CALEB WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!" i scream out at him, my eyes pouring tears quicker than a river. "what have you done?" my voice, so soft, so weak.

i hated that. i hated this, life, him.

"Listen, this isn't anything you should be happy i didn't tell you how i did it--oh i can do that right now actually" he smiles a sick smile at me, making me shudder and intenctivley back away from him slightly sadly he noticed and narrows hes eyes at me, "scared of me are you hay?".

My heart clenches as i close my eyes, "dont call me that. only family do!" i yell the last bit my eyes still closed, open them hay, open them and i did only to be met with very angry ones.

"So i'm not family now? are we not the same blood hay? what am i to you!" he shouts, spitting everywhere, i sigh, he is family. He really is, but this caleb isn't family nor well he ever be. I can't deal with him.

he launches at me, hes hands wrap around my throat making me squeak and loose my breath easily, "wake up hay! Wake up!" I scream, nearly jumping off the bed but Annie holds me down. I already feel the sweat around my face, the tears covering my cheeks and Annie's intense glare. "What was that" she says calmly, although her eyes screamed 'what the hell fid I just witness you stupid-* ya, you get me.

"Nothing" I say pushing her off me as I stand up from the bed, stretching. I give her a side glance only to see her glaring, "Annie, I said it was nothing, so it's nothing."

"Didn't seem like nothing."

"Well it was."

She sighs as I walk off to the bathroom, just as I was about to close the door on her face she stops me, "hay I'm just worried for you I can't-"

"You don't need to worry for me, I only need to worry about myself and so should you, I mean haven't you always? What changed now?" I glare at her, waiting for a reply that I didn't get I scoff, "you're pathetic Annie, so pathetic carry on living in you're dream fantasy."

Shutting the door on her face, I feel drained. The more the days pass by the more I want to kill myself and just end it, I'm so tired of the same nightmares in repeat. I look at myself in the mirror, "Caleb? When are you leaving me alone?." I ask, his face appearing on the mirror.

"Never."

I nod, that gives me an answer,I guess it will be at some point since I want to end it at some point. Walking off and out of my room, I run down the stairs and into the kitchen. "Hello? Where's everyone."

I look around the kitchen only to find a note 'we left to go shopping, you probably wouldn't want to come. Don't open the door, - mum' what the hell! I'm literally 11, they can't leave me here by myself. Groaning, I make myself some cereal. "Great, perfect timing actually."

Half way through the cereal, I stop. Putting the milk down, I walk back up the stairs slowly, I unlock Annie's room and just stare at the blue walls, and messy room. "Here it begins."

...

Yes, hate me. scream at me, I know I haven't updated in AGES. Months, and I'm sorry this chapter was also boring. But what do you think hayleys going to do?

Love,

M❤️