Something I want to share

11/11, morning

My mom just pissed me off, she didn't want me to move to the innovation high to the extreme point, like she got all fired upand then started to laugh at that idea. Yeah she was pissed off when I suggest that but I got even more frustrated because this is my own life, not hers, and I don't care if my dad said it's because she gotta stay home and couldn't find a job to refresh her mind and got all messed up so that she turned to me. Like wth, I know she got frustrated with finding a job and got this whole disappointment for the society but that's not my fault, in fact I didn't even want to move to Orange County because it's the hardest placeto find a job and plus, I have no friend here, school even more sucks because of McGrawhill and the school district, I swear I just feel like they both are killing me and that's why I came up with this idea of transfering to Innovation High in Anaheim. Bro I have even attempted suicide twice while I was at school but I wasn't confident enough to think that I can go to heaven because I killed myself. I got sick of how I'm always the only one at school that have no one to have lunch with even tho I have joined a club, even more sick of how everyone just tell me to suck it up or keep it to myself, I can't afford a session with a psychologist on Better Help, I should have known that I could have asked my mom to pay for me or my dad but I don't have enough courage since they're just slaving out there and yeah, I can only ask for $10 weekly or even monthly. I should be able to convince myself that I have tried my best to help them by applying for the jobs, telling them to help me move school so that I can have more time to work, that school is for 14-24 so there's no way I can't enroll, I even notice some smart kids also have their legs in there. My dad made a deal to let me visit it this Tuesday so I hope he won't change his mind.