Being with the leader of SWAT means a lot of compromise in the relationship. But knowing they'll come home at the end of the day is a relief. Sometimes you don't know and it scare the hell out of you.
The weeks passed and knowing Zee wasn't there made me a little sleep deprived some nights. After the wedding, Zee and I were together again. "You look beautiful in your gown," I stated. "Well, you look great all the time."
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"Thank you," Zee smiled.
"Zee," Street walked up to us. "You never told me how Hondo knew you were in trouble that night."
"This bracelet," Zee sighed as she held out her wrist. "This is a button. Every time I press it, it sends a distress message to Hondo's phone. If I am truly in trouble and there are armed shooters around, I would press this one. That's when LAPD SWAT would roll around." I put my arm around Zee. "So, if I'm ever in a situation that bad, I'm your eyes and ears."
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"SWAT's got a good asset on the team," I smiled.
"Yeah," Zee nodded. Her phone virabted and she looked at it. "Los Angeles High School asked me to give a speech on Monday."
"I'll go with," I smiled.
"Okay," Zee smiled. "Hondo and I have to get home." She looked at Street. "I hear you've been crashing at Luca's." He sighed. "Hey, Luca's hard on you because he knows you have potential."
"I know," Street nodded. "You guys have a good night."
"You have a good night, man," I nodded. The day of Zee's speech came by. All the students were sitting in the bleachers in the gym as Zee was preparing for her speech. I handed her the microphone. "You go this, baby."
"I know," Zee smiled.
"I give you, Zendaya Rich," the principal stated.
"Thank you, Principal Garvey," Zee replied as I followed her to the middle of the gym floor. The students were clapping. "I think you for having me here to share my story on bullying." She looked at them. "If I knew what I know now, it probably wouldn't change very much. Because, sometimes, it doesn't matter what you know, what you feel just takes over. Imagine you stayed there, stuck in that narrow dark place. That's what it can be like to live with a mental illness. At least that's what it was like for me at the depth of my own mental illness. My perception had become constricted, darkened, and collapsed. The only thing that I could think was, you're not good enough, you're not smart enough, you're not enough." I was on guard, looking around making sure everything was alright. "And it didn't matter if I was, because these were the constricted limits of my perception. The only thing I could think about in that moment, nobody would even know you're gone. Most days, I probably seemed like any other normal person, if not a little quiet. I was so normal, most people never would've guessed that I was in that dark place. I know some of you know that feeling. I always had a fake smile and it would pass like nothing was wrong. That's how those things go." She sighed. "People seem plenty eager to talk about bullying and suicide as long as it's behind closed doors and in hushed voices. I figured, if I'm wanting to make a change, I gotta do something about it now. And sharing my story is the first step."
