My Middle School Years.

Summer Break.

Over summer break, we didn't really talk. It was more like silent love. Then it became fucking forbidden love...
My mom had found some messages of me and Roland "talking dirty to each other." I still refused to stop dating him. He had also sent a dick pic. Yeah, he says he was high. I can believe that.

"You need to break up with this boy Adrianna Alexandria Batey. He is just trouble Adrianna. It is what's best for you. I don't want you wasting your life on some no good boy."

"I love him mom. I won't. I refuse. You can't make me!" I then got grounded for it. I don't understand why. It's my life and how I choose to mother fucking live it is my decision. Not hers. She wouldn't let me tell him though.
So then a two months go on and I keep freaking out because I can't text Rivet. I had so many things going through my head;

"What if he wants to break up? What if he doesn't love me? What if he thinks I broke up with him and that's why I'm not texting back? What is the point in having a boyfriend if you can't talk."
My mom said I looked fucking traumatized and all I said was;

"If you lost your true love, you would be too." I hissed at her. I would barely talk to her. I had no reason to. No reason. I still loved her. Just angry. Distraught. Lost without him. You know how people say, "When you are in love, you know it's true. There are no words to explain it. You would be going on forever."

That's how I felt. I felt completely in love. For life. Never once had I felt that way before. I was fucking lost. Like I would go to my dads and everybody would ask,
"What's wrong?"
So it was the last month of summer, so I decide to go to my dads. Selfie and Katy decided to come over too.

Selfie has brown and blonde hair. She is really short. She is also a tomboy. Then Katy, has blonde hair. Same height as me. She is kinda a Girly girl and a tomboy. They are both really skinny. Unlike Me, I have brown hair. Curly hair. People say I'm skinny, I don't believe them. I am a tomboy. No if, ands, or buts about it. HA. I said butt. But with only one t. HA. I'm killing myself here.

Anyways. So even though I'm not aloud on any devices. Including, cellphones, computers, or tablets. My dad lets me though. So I get on the tablet and Sofie says she has to show me something. It turns out to be Selfie and River's old messages. I didnt know that at the time. Here they are;
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
||River and Selfie's messages||
R- Will you go out with me?
S- Ain't you still dating Attie?
R- I don't know, she hasn't text me or anything.
S- Oh.
Then River sends a picture of his dick. To my STEP FUCKING SISTER.
S- Uhm..
R- You like?
S- Uhhh..
R- well goodbye then.
After that softie did not respond and she showed me the messages and I broke up with him. I was in tears. I cried for days. Actually I still cry about it. A fucking lot. I couldn't stand being with out him. Then after that, my life just went downhill.

The next week, I watched my mother get slapped across the face by my stepdad. Could you imagine? I cried and died even more inside. Then I started to cut. On my legs. So nobody could see. Tried to commit suicide at some point. They always say, "If you love someone, let them go." We'll I couldn't. I wouldn't. I held onto him and I would not let him even escape my thoughts. I was a heartbroken, mind racing, crazy psycho bitch.

I didn't want to. He hurt me in unimaginable ways. Then just three weeks later. I find out my Papal died. Ran head on into a semi truck. On purpose. My papal had been hurting for a long time. A long, long time. I missed him. Still do. I spent days Upon days crying for him. I loved him so fucking much. It just made me want River more. So I could cry on his shoulder and him just say;
"It's gonna be OK."
I would have been fine with that, but no. HA. I said but again. Sorry. As I was saying I just had to dump him.