Shadow of my Brother | Book 1 Walking Travesty | All Time Low Fanfiction

Chapter 28: Trauma

"Stop!"
I bolt up with a scream, sweat covered my forehead and my heart racing at 100. My breathing slowed down as I realise I'm still in the safety of Alex's bedroom. I'd had a nightmare of returning home and instantly being harmed. The punches and kicks being next level and Jack got hurt as well trying to stop our parents. I wasn't ready to go home but I knew I had to.
"Hey" I jump at the touch of Alex, putting his hand on my shoulder.
"You okay?"
I bite my lip and shake my head no, "I had a nightmare about going home."
"Do you want to talk about?"
"They just hurt me and Jack tried to stop them but then" I couldn't continue as a tear slipped down my face.
"Come here" Alex says pulling me close to him and I bury my head into his neck as he rubs my arm, soothing me.
"You know I won't let anything happen to you. If anything does you call me straight away or don't feel afraid to run to Jack, he'd protect you if he knew the truth."
"I know, I guess it's just fear of the unknown, they're predictable but also not."
Alex kisses my head, "come on, we gotta get up and get ready for school anyway. You pack your stuff and I'll make you breakfast."
"Okay" I say and we kiss before he climbs out of bed and heads downstairs.

I was quiet for the whole day, nervous about this afternoon. How would my parents react? I'd been gone a while. Did they notice? Were they mad? Did they even miss me the slightest bit? Highly doubted that assumption.
"Kristine."
My head snaps to the left of me at Serena calling my name.
"What?"
"Why're you drawing that in your book?"
I look down and see the words 'help me' written all over my page. Shit my mind was spilling everywhere, I couldn't let my secret out.
"I gotta go" I say and pack up my stuff and head to the bathroom.
I shut the door and lean against the sink, taking in deep breaths.
"Get a control of yourself Kristine. You're just going home, nothing will happen. Nothing will happen."
I look at myself in the mirror, my broken self was arising again. This is what that place did to me and I wasn't even back there yet.
"You have to be strong, don't let them beat you. You aren't scared anymore."
I grab my book and pull out the page I had written on and throw it to the side. The bathroom door then opens and in steps Lisa.
"Oh it's you" she says, "I was hoping to get some peace in here."
"I was just leaving" I say and push past her, hiding myself from her.

I barely ate at lunch, the thoughts still being too much. The memories of my nightmare. There was blood, fists flying and screams. All horrible things you'd find in a nightmare.
"She's not eating and she's been quiet all day" I overhear Serena say, "she ran off in class."
"Kristy."
My mind wouldn't snap out of its trance.
"Kris."
A hand connects with mine bringing me back. I see Serena, Cori, Jack and Alex looking at me concerned.
"What? Why're you all looking at me?"
"You've been acting weird all day Kristy. I went and got Jack and Alex because we're worried" Serena says
"Yeah you ran out of class after writing help me all over your page" Cori states.
"What you did that?" Jack asks, "Kristine what's going on?"
"Nothing I just had a nightmare last night and it's just stuck with me is all."
Alex looks at me with heaps of concern, he was very worried about my mental state and my safety.
"Come with me" he says, "you're going to get some air."
I sigh and walk with Alex to outside the school and I lean against the building.
"You wrote help me on paper?"
"I didn't know I was doing it" I say not looking at him.
"Are you sure you can go home because christ you're scaring me Kris. I don't want you going back if it's doing this."
"So first you say I'll be fine and now you're worried?" I snap
"You weren't zoning out or anything before."
"I guess you take more notice now of me and my mental state because I kiss you then huh?"
"What do you mean?"
"I've always been like this Alex. Always, you've just never noticed nor cared in the past! Now that I apparently mean something to you, I guess you're like oh I better step in."
"Kris I've always cared about you, tried looking out for you when I can."
I kick at the dirt, "I'm sorry I don't know why I'm snapping or zoning out. I guess I've been too focused on you to worry about what home life is like. Now it's all coming back."
"It's okay, you're scared and it's okay to be scared."
"I just want school to end so I can get it over and done with" I say and head back inside.

I stare down the drive of my home. The place I only knew fear. The house of nightmares. The house stood tall, towering over my tiny form, making me feel small and insignificant.
"You'll be okay" I say
Jack was at rehearsal with the boys, Alex had wanted to come with me but I said he needed to be at practice which meant I was facing this alone. I take a breath in and walk up to the door. It was only seconds but it felt like time was dragging on. I grab the handle of the door and turn it, opening the death trap. I step inside closing the door behind me.
"Jack, is that you?" I hear mum call from the kitchen.
I tried to sneak past, get to the safety of my room but she emerged.
"Kristine" she says not impressed, "so you finally decided to return home. Where have you been?"
"Just away, getting my head clear. Sometimes you just need to get away."
"For a week? Without letting me know? I don't believe that's right."
I gulp, please don't go south already.
"I'm sorry I won't do it again, I'll let you know next time."
"You say that you will a lot but you never do" she says stepping closer to me. I try to stand tall but I shrink back into myself.
"There's dishes in the kitchen, you can do that now."
"Can I put my stuff in my room."
"Now."
I look at the floor and go to the kitchen. This wasn't the worst thing but I feared what else might come.
"Are those new clothes?"
I freeze, "Serena wanted me to try something new today, she wanted me to borrow hers."
"They look pathetic, too nice for you. They show too much."
"It's just my stomach" I say, "what harm can that do?"
"You don't know what goes on in boys' brains Kristine. Lots of dirty things. You've been hanging around that Alex kid haven't you?"
"I see him at school, that's it. He's Jack's friend not mine" I lie
"Do you know what happens when you lie?"
"I'm..."
"Jack has said other things, he's mentioned you're getting close with his friend. Is that true or not?"
"We're just friends. That's it. I like music and so do they so we get along."
"I've seen how he looks at you. He doesn't want to be friends. He'll use you, like he has in the past with other girls. Don't think I don't know his reputation."
I grip a plate, hard enough to where I could break it.
"Alex isn't like that. He's different. He's not like other guys and he's never used girls before."
"Don't tell me he's got you around his finger?" My mum looks at me slyly, "unless, that's where you've been this past week."
"I said I've been nowhere."
"Your father will deal with you when he gets home. Get it out of you one way or another. If you have been at that boy's house, my my."
She then leaves the kitchen and I can feel my eyes starting to water. What has Jack said to them?

Father came home at around 5pm, an hour before Jack would come home for dinner. I sit in my room, trying to study when the door opens.
"So you are back. Thought you'd never return."
"If only I had the option" I whisper
"Where have you been?"
"I said to mum I have been around. You don't have to know everything."
"You trying to be smart?"
"No"
"Then tell me" he says walking towards me, trapping me in my chair, "where you've been!"
"Nowhere!"
He looks down at me, noticing my clothes like mum had.
"Where'd you get those?"
"Serena at school."
"Showing a bit too much off don't you think? Get a bit too much attention from boys at school."
I push his hand away from me as he moves it towards the lining of my shirt.
"Get away from me" I say and try to get up but my father grabs me.
"Don't speak to me like that!"
I could feel my arm bruising in his grip.
"Let me go!"
"You want me to let you go? I'll let you go!"
He throws me to the ground next to my bed.
"Now tell me where you've been!"
"No!"
"Fine we'll play the guessing game" he says grabbing my hair, "except with every guess wrong, punishment occurs."
"Stop!"
"Then tell me!"
"With a friend! I was at a friends house!"
He pulls my hair making me scream, "not clear enough!"
"I'll tell you if you don't hurt him! Don't bring him into this!"
"So it's a boy's house, I can think of one person that would be, Jack has mentioned you were getting close to Alex, I didn't think it was this close."
"Just leave him alone" I cry, "you can hurt me all you want but don't do anything to him."
"Oh I won't do anything to him, physically."
My father throws my face to the ground and storms towards the doors.
"Please don't!"
"You won't see that boy again! You'll come home straight after school until the end of your high school life! If you don't then there will be consequences!"
"He's my friend!"
"And this" he says grabbing my phone, "is no longer yours."
He stomps on my phone breaking it.
"Stop!"
"You will never know happiness! You will never deserve it! Never leave this house again!"
My door is slammed shut and locked behind him. That's when I let the tears fall. Everything burst out. All of my fear from today had come true. I couldn't call Alex, I couldn't call Jack, I couldn't reach anyone. It was just me, trapped in my room. My room in this house of hell and this was only the beginning.