mirror // pansy parkinson

eleven

'One of the effects, Parkinson. Your legs are paralysed.'

I stopped breathing for a moment.

'MY LEGS ARE WHAT?'

'Did I stutter?' he snapped.

I searched for my glasses, grab hold of them and put them on. Carter had a pissed-off expression on his face and I had the audacity to wonder why.

When I remembered, I winced.

'Oh,' I said in a small voice. 'I'm sorry.'

'I've warned you,' he said again. 'You didn't listen.'

'I never listen,' I admitted with an exasperated sigh. 'Though I wish I did for once.'

'But really,' I added, 'I have the absolute right to know.'

'God,' he rubbed the back of his neck nervously, 'I know.'

I stared at his flushed expression.

'What the bloody hell am I doing here?'

'Getting better–'

'Getting better?' I snapped without moving an inch. 'Getting better? Carter, I'm going to die. Either it's tomorrow or tonight or anytime of my goddamned life I have left, I am going to die.'

'Everyone's going to die eventually-'

'Not everyone is dying at this young age.'

His head jerked to look at me. 'Pansy, what you saw isn't going to determine your fate–'

'No one comes out of here alive, Carter.' 

'You might.'

'I'm not special.'

He didn't say anything. He got up and moved to the door.

He hesitated to go out at first, I can tell. He eventually turned and said,

'My mother created this institute because she believes in hope. She said hope is the only one that can restore us. She believes that hope could cure us. She wants her patients to believe in hope.'

My eyes eyes flicked over to him. 'Did that work, though? Did hope help the other patients for the last few decades?'

He stared right into her eyes, and the gaze seemed to pierce through me. 'It didn't.'

He left and I was alone.

–

The next morning, Winona surprised me by some skin decorations.

'What is this?'

I looked at the odd swirls that seemed to be crawling up my legs. It reminded me of those permanent marks muggles get on their skin. Or whatever they're called.

'It's for healing your legs,' Winona stated, putting her wand away. 'It will numb your legs and heal it. Then, after a few weeks, you'll be able to walk again.'

'Few weeks?' I frowned. 'So now I can't walk?'

'No, but,' Winona looked giddy now, 'there's another way.'

She held up a finger to say 'one second' and hurried out of my room.

A second later she returned with a chair. A chair with wheels. She flashed it at me. I just stared.

'This is what muggles use when they can't walk– a wheelchair!' She was so cheery, it was amusing.

I scrunched my nose up. 'No thank you, I rather stay in for a week–'

'Definitely not,' she said. She pushed the wheelchair towards me and added, 'let's go for our morning stroll and take in some greenery or something.' 

I rolled my eyes, fixed myself in the wheelchair and yelped when she violently swung the chair around. 

She winced. 'Sorry for that.'

We always took a morning walk together. There was a garden just outside of the institute. It was large and vibrant. Too vibrant with the colors of flowers. Normally I wouldn't fancy it that much, but the garden had an ambience I surprisingly like. Winona said probably because of the mundane type of flowers. But I don't sweat on it a lot.

We would talk about things, get to know each other better and it was the only time of a day that I could pretend I'm not suffering from an illness.

She pushed me gently around the institute and we chatted along.

'Do you like dresses, Winona?'

'Oh sure. I have a lot in my wardrobe,' she chuckled. 'My aunt works at a dressing store and always have a time to ship me some.'

'The only time I ever wore a dress was at the Yule Ball in Hogwarts.'

'Was it fun, the ball?'

'No, I wouldn't say it was fun. I don't like my dress that day.'  I snickered.

'Shame. You must've looked gorgeous on thar day!'

I shrugged my shoulders. 'I wouldn't say.'

'Ooh, I have a brilliant idea!' Winona suddenly exclaimed.

I arched an eyebrow.

'I could lend you some of my dresses for you to pretend you're a royal.'

'That'll be nice,' I said, pondering on this. Being a royal for a day sounds nice.

Winona was about to say something but I spoke up, 'Can I write to my mates back in Hogwarts?'

She blinked, probably a little bit surprised at the swift change of topic. 'That is not my place to decide.'

'It'll be brief.' I reached out to touch a red flower.

'I have to ask Greta first.'

'I promise it will be brief.'

'Yes but I still have to ask her, darling. We only have two owls around here. I'm pretty sure she'll say yes since she restricted you enough for five months.'

'Do they know about my condition?'

'She probably might have told some of your friends that you're facing treatment.'

'Or did she just tell them I'm abroad?'

She shrugged. 'Why would she lie?'

I shuffled in my seat. 'I got a dream- presumably a vision that my friends were saying that I'm abroad. Changed schools.'

Winona scowled. 'I really don't know, Pansy. Greta and Poppy are quite secretive.'

'If my friends think I'm abroad or whatnot,' I said, suddenly realising, 'they don't even know I'm ill.'

Winona widened her eyes.

'Well,' she said softly, 'maybe that's for the best. Maybe Greta thought it would worsen the situation if word got out.'

I sighed in exasperation. 'Well, what do you think? Is it best if I kept it a secret from my friends?'

'As much as I'm loyal to Greta, I think you should tell to some. After all, they are your friends.'

'So,' I said, smirking while plucking a flower, 'can I write now without Greta's consent?'

I could see Winona's gears whirring. After a moment, she sighed. 'Okay, fine. I have the keys to the owls. But if we ever got caught, I'm not to blame.'

I grinned, examining the flower closely. 'That's a deal, Winnie.'

a/n — I'VE UPDATED! I'm sorry for not updating for such a long time :(

and props to one of my readers for asking me to update! thanks for kicking some sense into me lmao (I've abandoned this book for quite a while)

thanks for reading and have a great day!

( remember to wash your hands )