Present

4.1

Audrey

The Barton house was tucked into a dead end street right down the road from the church. It was a small, yellow, two story house with perfectly mowed grass and two small flower beds on either side of the sidewalk that led up to the covered porch. On the porch sat a bowl of cat food, a small bag of tools, and porch swing that would be perfect for reading books during the summer. I knew Gwen had probably spent much of her childhood reading on that swing because it's exactly what I would have done, given the opportunity. However, our porch wasn't covered like Gwen's, and I remember getting chased down by my mom often to get slathered in sunscreen no matter how bright the sun was. I still sometimes ended up with bits if pink on my shoulders, despite my mom's best efforts.

Inside the house were light gray walls with white trim. Just inside the door was a mud room, for the days when Gwen would play in the rain or snow as a child. The mud room branched off to a hallway. On one side was the living room that led into the dining room and just past the dining room was the kitchen. On the other side of the hallway was a set of stair that no doubt led to their bedrooms. On the wall by the stairs were various pictures of Gwen at different stages of life, from being a bald baby to frizzy haired middle school to high school with braces.

"Ugh, dont look at those," Gwen's face was tinged pink. Despite the vast differences in the pictures, their likeness was unmistakable.

When her parents were out of ear shot, I whispered, "i thought the once with braces were pretty cute."

"They are not. Shut up." She shoved me, though not hard enough to make me budge.

"Hey, anything with you in it is cute." I glanced around to make sure her parents were in the kitchen and out of earshot.

Gwen rolled her eyes and gestured for me to follow her to the living room. We each sat at opposite ends of the couch as she flipped through the tv channels, eventually settling on a reality show focused on the worst restaurants in America as her mother's cast iron steaks sizzled in the next room. my stomach growled again and I crossed my arms in a poor attempt to hush it

"It won't be long," Gwen said nonchalantly.

I nodded, glancing at the tv. I looked down at my lavender dress and regretted not bringing a change of clothes. I hadn't planned on being stuck in a dress all day, but then again I also didn't plan on having dinner with Gwen's family.

Not long after, Barbara called us into the dining room and four plates were ready on the table. Sitting on that plate was the most beautiful steak I had ever seen, paired with baby potatoes and steamed vegetables. It took everything in me to not dig into the meal then and there. We each sat at the round dining room table and Barbara and Keith extended their hands to us. It was a gesture that said it was time to pray over the meal. My stomach shifted at the new, unfamiliar experience. Gwen grabbed her mother's hand without hesitation, no doubt used to the family tradition. She extended her hand to me and I stopped analyzing them long enough to grasp it and then reach for Keith's open hand. I was holding hand with my closeted girlfriend and her father and waiting for someone to bless our food. Life can be funny sometimes.

Gwen and her parents seemed to bow their heads simultaneously and I awkwardly copied their motions seconds later. Keith opened his mouth and began talking to god like he was a parent and a friend. He asked for Him to bless the food and our lives while simultaneously thanking Him. When they released each others hand and lifted their heads, I was once again stuck in my several second delay. I was incredibly out if sync with this family.

I tried to dig in without looking like a ravenous animal. I could have sworn my stomach was about to eat itself, I had gone so long without food. I was never skipping breakfast again, I decided. Though the potatoes were a bit dry for my liking, i hardly cared. I sopped up the juice from the perfectly cooked medium steak with my potatoes.

As Barbara cut into her next piece of steak, she looked up at us. "I trust you two are being a good influence on each other while off at Barnette?"

"Mooom," Gwen groaned. It was clear that she just wanted to eat and wasn't prepared for a full lecture on top of her meal.

"I'm just checking in," Barbara said innocently. "Last time you had a best friend, you got in all sorts of trouble."

Trouble? Gwen? There was no way. I dared to look over at her. Gwen quietly returned her fork to her plate. She refused to look up.

"I didn't do anything," she muttered.

"Of course you didn't," Barbara roed her eyes so hard they nearly rolled right out of her head. "And I suppose you didn't deserve any of the consequences either. It was all her fault, right?"

Gwen remained silent. I felt frozen in place, unable to move. It was as if Barbara had either forgotten I was there, or really was just in the mood to be down right intimidating. I had to wonder if this kind of semi-public humiliation was something Gwen was often subjected to in front of friends.

"Gwen, you know you were sent to camp for your own good. You had to fix your behavior before you went down the wrong path," Keith said quietly, shoving a fresh cut piece of steak into his mouth.

Tell me he does not mean what I think he means, I thought to myself. The gears began to shift in my head, the puzzle pieces fitting together. I had remembered Gwen telling me about how the majority of her teenage life was spent hiding romantic relationships under the guise of friendships, slipping right under her parents noses. But she had never mentioned her parents figuring anything out and I had always assumed that they lived their lives blissfully unaware of Gwen's shenanigans.

"And I'm fixed, okay? Can we please just eat?" Gwen looked up and glared defiantly at both of them. HEr parents had just aired the family dirty laundry in front of me, someone they've only met a couple of times. I wanted nothing more than to disappear right there.

"Yes, yes, of course," Barbara coughed. "Can't let everyone's steaks get cold. Besides, I'm sure you guys will be wanting to get back soon. I know college is busy for you both."

"Yeah, I have a test tomorrow that I need to study for," I lied. ANything to get out of here faster.

"Better eat fast, we wouldn't want to be the cause of a bad grade," Keith winked. Of course you wouldn't, Keith.

I shoved the food around my plate, occasionally taking a bite of the now lukewarm steak. I glanced at the clock on the wall and counted the minutes until we could abandon this awkwardly silent meal.