Stereotypical Youtuber Fanfiction

You snuggle up against her your love. Your lovely, lovely, love. It's a lovely summer afternoon, and in the lovely summer's heat under the lovely sun you consider how the two of you came to be together. Because you have nothing better to do.

It's all, you recall in a flashback-y fashion, because of that one, gun wielding magical flying unicorn, the godmother of all fanfiction...

You first saw her at three or four in the morning, on your back porch. You were doing homework on the back porch because you didn't want to wake up your roommates with your loud singing, and also because it seemed like a good idea at the time.

"La-di-dah." You sang along, blissfully out of tune, to your favorite song. "Hmmmm, hrmm, Hmmmmm!!"

"(Your name)!!!" The creature appeared out of nowhere, a glorious vision of pink and rainbow sparkles. "(Your name)!!! You must marry (Attractive Youtuber--AY) from (AY's youtube channel)!! Are you listening??"

You blinked at her sleepily. You'd heard that one can experience hallucinations if one stays up late enough, but you'd never actually believed it. Boy was I wrong, you thought, who knew my subconscious could summon up such a garish vision?

"Wow." You said, "You are super pink."

The unicorn beamed. "Why, thank you. I do try."

"Your welcome. I meant it from the bottom of my heart."

"I knew you were worthy of my glorious presence. Now, quick, get up and go to Utah!"

You blinked. "I don't have any money for that. Besides, I have to finish my homework."

"Then, I'll transport you. We'll be there within a blink of an eye! A rather slow blink, but it still counts!!"

"I'm sorry, but I don't really know you. Stranger danger and all that. Besides, I don't like Utah."

She frowned. "But your going to a branch of Utah-based school. Doesn't that mean you're a fan?"

"No. I don't really like deserts, they're kind of dry. Also, wherever I stay in Utah, the water always kind of tastes bad. Not a fan."

"But you're one true love is in Utah!"

"Nah, I'd never fall for someone from Utah. Maybe Idaho... if the timing was right. Anyways, didn't you want me to meet (AY)? He's not from Utah."

"Well, he's visiting."

"Why?"

"Obviously it doesn't matter, because you won't go meet him. Also, I didn't bother finding out."

"Cool. Goodbye."

"Aren't you going to come with me?!"

"No. I don't do drugs. See you later."

The pink unicorn scowled. "You most certainly will." Then she disappeared in a cloud of pink, cupcake smelling smoke.

You rubbed your eyes. "Well, that was bizarre. I should probably talk to a psychiatrist about that."

Then you continued doing your homework.

Crawling into bed at five in the morning, you promptly forgot the whole episode, discounting it as a particularly vivid dream.

***

(AY) was having a particularly vivid dream.

"Look." Said the large, pink horse sitting on his chest. "You have to go to Idaho, and wait in Walmart, because your counterpart is being very uncooperative."