Spilled Ink and Scribbled Lines (Crimson Lines Sequel)

Chapter Six

Song of the chapter:
Cough Syrup by Young the Giant

[ J a c k ]

The night had started off well enough.
Exploring through London with Kat as our unofficial tour guide. Laughing about the stupidest shit we could think of. Watching as the lights from the city crashed into the lights from the stars.

And now here Kat and I were.

Practically naked, making out against a wall which had been covered in an ugly floral paper.

I wrap my arms around her waist, feeling... little raised lines. My heart drops and I pause. Kat whines "Jack what are you doing?"

Reaching for the light switch I hope and pray that it's not what I think it is. The lamp overhead flickers on and I stare at the petite girl in front of me.
I notice the way her hip and collar bones stick out, and the freckles that mark her shoulders. The way her small chest rises and falls with each breath. And all these things about her are beautiful.

When I look to her arms, thighs, and stomach, the skin is littered with lines. Dark red ones and pale white ones. Purple and black bruises. What must be four or five cigarette burns.

She frowns and looks down at her feet, playing with her hands nervously. "I'm sorry, Jack" She says quietly, pulling her sweater back on "I'll go stay in Zack's room for the night. You don't have to see this anymore-"

"No, no, no. Kat I'm not mad. I just... Oh god I just hoped this wouldn't still be going on. Don't be upset" I take her hands in mine. She mumbles another unnecessary apology.

"Baby, look at you. You're a piece of artwork. But these lines all over your skin, they're like marks from little erasers... Kat why would you try to erase all of this beautiful art?"

She shakes her head and wipes at her eyes with her sleeves. "I'm not artwork..." She mumbles "Jack can we please not talk about this right now?"

I nod, pulling her into a hug. She rests her head against my chest and takes a deep breath.

Alright, Jack, you fucked up last time. Now, you gotta do something right or you can forget ever getting her back.

"What do you wanna do?" I ask quietly

"I'm really tired, really drunk, really sad" She shrugs "Can we just watch a movie and pretend nothing's wrong? I mean, if we do anything more I'm gonna be hating myself even more in the morning"

"Uh, sure" I nod slightly, letting go.

She crawls under the covers on the bed and says "They're probably all dumb on demand movies but that's okay"

I sit next to her, looking through the channels

"Do they have Netflix here?" She asks. I chuckle slightly, the more Kat drinks the more she sounds like a little kid.

"Yeah"

"Oh my god yes," She says "We should watch Bob's Burgers"

"Okay" I put on the tv show and sigh happily as Kat rests her head on my shoulder

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The episode ends and as I'm about to click on the next one Kat says "I really fucking wanted to avoid you"

"I know and I'm sorry that I left you I fucked up so bad and I didn't even think about your-"

"Two years," She takes a deep breath "I spent two years thinking about what I would say to you if I ever ran into you again. Believe me, I thought up some pretty awful shit. Then when I saw you I fucking forgot it all"

"What are you saying?" I ask

"I'm saying fuck you for fixing me and then leaving. Fuck you for showing up again out of nowhere. And fuck you for making it impossible for me not to love you" She wraps her arms around me and I kiss her forehead. My fingers trace the scars, being careful not to hurt her.

I have to keep reminding myself that she's drunk and that she doesn't mean most of what she's saying. She probably won't even remember that we talked like this. As much as I'd like what we're saying to mean something more, it's just drunken thoughts. And that really fucking hurts.

"I love you too" I whisper