Memory

The Tesseract

Hey guys, I'm really sorry for the extremely late update but I'm actually reading 5 books at once and I have homework and another book to work on so I've been kind of busy. Also, memes consume my time too.

So yeah, sorry again but here you go! New chapter!

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My skin is gray. And my pulse is gone.

My heart beats no more.

My hair, that was once jet black, is dull and almost dark grey. It does not shine anymore.

My fingernail moons are bluish and everything feels unnatural around me, even though I know I'm  the unnatural one.

Undead.

I don't know where I am, except that I see a building near. I am probably still recognizable, but I don't care anymore. If news gets back to my dad that I am alive, he will have to find out what I am now. And then he won't care about me anymore.

I have to tell myself it's okay and that it will be better that way, even though my heart twinges with pain at the thought. The thought of being unwanted.

And I've been unwanted before, grew up unwanted and unappreciated, but the thought of being like that again hurts. But it doesn't hurt as much as it nearly should. All emotions, even shock, feel as if there is a thick fog between me and them. Distant.

I stumble toward the building on shaky legs, and I see a fountain with enough water for me to make out my reflection. My face is sallow and gaunt and grey, my hair stringy, lips set thin and my eyes--My eyes are completely black.

I pull back from the reflection and I remember why I am here. I need to acquire the Tesseract an two other things and then I can be human again. And Rowan will be alive again.

There is one emotion I feel now: grief. I know that even in death, I will miss him.

I will do anything to get him back, even if I am an emotionless monster now.

Because I made him a promise. My first promise. And I intend to keep it.

I hear a silky, familiar voice and I whirl around. "Stark."

I nod stiffly. Can't bring myself to care that this asshole has shown up, because I can see the Tesseract in his hands.

I must be in the woods where I was before I died.

His eyes are filled with confusion as he takes in my face, the drastic change in my appearance, and his eyes show a glimmer of fear when he meets my black ones.

"What do you want?" God, even my voice sounds inhuman. Dead, icy.

Is Aelin in this body, too? I don't know.

"You made a deal with Hela, didn't you?"

That surprises me. I didn't realize he knew who the goddess of death was. "You know who she is?"

"The goddess of death. Ruler of Helheim. Why?"

"Nothing." I say. So he doesn't know she's his older sister.

"But you made a deal with her?"

"Yes," I say, nodding to the Tesseract. "I'm going to need that."

"I'm afraid not," he drawls, leaning on the side of the fountain, holding it up high so I can't reach it.

I kick him where it hurts and grab the Tesseract as it falls to the ground during his cry of pain.

Too fast, too easy. Something feels wrong.

Something is  wrong. The Tesseract disintegrates from my hand and so does the Loki in front of me. Another one appears from behind the other side of the fountain. An illusion.

"Why do you need it?" this one asks lazily, holding the Tesseract up high again when I try to grab it.

"Why do you need to know?" I challenge. I try punching this one in the stomach, but it's another illusion and my arm goes through his abdomen.

What's wrong with me? I can't see through the illusions anymore; is it because I'm dead now? Probably.

"Why don't you come fight me instead of hiding like a coward?" My voice rings out.

I'm stupid. I know he's going to win in a fight against me. But this is the only way I'm going to get him to show himself for real.

It doesn't work out.

"Where would be the fun in that?" he says, swinging his legs from the very top of the fountain, just above the place from where the water spills.

"Damn you," I mutter, sitting down on the side of it. I know that if that's an illusion, I'm not finding him anytime soon. And I know if that's the real him, he's going to have to climb down because I don't see the Tesseract on him.

Well, that could just be another illusion hiding it from my view.

In conclusion, I'm fucked and everything about this plans sucks.

Now what do I do?

For a moment I'm tempted to let myself fade away; I'll see Rowan again in Hel when I die. Unless Hela lied and he's in Valhalla, in which case we may not ever see each other again. Two halves of a whole heart and soul, separated for eternity.

So I let my mind wander, until a jolt of shock runs through me.

In front of me is Rowan, white hair blowing in the wind and tattoos faded, translucent. Like a ghost.

"Rowan?" I try to say, but he only smiles. When he reaches out to brush a strand of hair from my cheek, his hand feels real enough. But when I reach up to grab his hand and beg him to stay forever, my hands grab at empty air as he fades into the wind, a sad smile on his face.

I stare at the spot where he was in shock. A small piece of paper, charred at the edges, flutters to the ground in front of me, and what remains of my heart is filled with anger.

One month and your time is up. Tick, tock. Tick, tock.

That was not Rowan, then. That must have been Hela sending me a message, telling me what I have to lose if I fail. Trying to manipulate me into getting the Tesseract, like she doubted I would try. But it works.

She knows I will go to the ends of this universe to speak to him one last time. And maybe I will.

I am going to get the Tesseract. Whatever it takes.

There is a reason I never promised anyone anything before. Because I knew that if I did, I would be bound to an oath forever. And I am. Because for all my lies, never have I sworn anything, until that day when everything inside me fell to ruin.

But oaths were sworn. And they will be fulfilled.