The Umbrella Academy Crack (REQUESTS OPEN)

☆Pick up lines (dirty)☆

AN: all the nine-year-olds should leave now

☆Diego☆
Him:
"Call me leaves cuz you should be blowing me right now."

You:
"Huh, I lost my keys. Can I look in your pants?"

☆Klaus☆
Him:
"Let's play carpenter; first, we get hammered, then I nail you."

You:
"I'm good at math; U+I=69"

☆Five☆
Him:
"Your left leg is Easter, your right leg is Christmas. I'd like to meet you between the holidays."

You:
"You and I are like cocoa and marshmallows; you're hot and I wanna be on top of you."

☆Ben☆
Him:
"They say the tongue is the strongest muscle in the body. Wanna fight?"

You:
"There's a party in my pants and you're the only one invited."

(Vanyas too precious and innocent)