Just A Farm Gal

Chapter Eight

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you." I heard a whisper.

I slowly opened my eyes. It was still dark, around 4am, I was guessing. I turned my head to see Noah wrapped around me; his arm was over my waist, his legs tangled in mine and his chin resting on my shoulder. His eyes were still closed so I don't know if I had dreamed what I just heard.

"What did you say?" I whispered.

"You heard me. I want everything with you."

Everything? My heart pounded. Not out of love but out of fear. I loved him but I didn't realise how serious it was becoming.

We had been together for three weeks now. Noah either spent the night at mine or I was at his. We stayed together at least four times a week and we were moving fast. This had confirmed it. I got up out of bed, not caring what time it was and threw last night's clothes on.

"What's the matter? Where are you going?" Noah asked, sitting up in bed.

"I just need some fresh air."

"Did I say something wrong?"

"No."

"Hallie, don't walk out on me."

But I was too late, I was out of the bedroom. I headed downstairs quietly. It was still dark which meant it was definitely earlier than 4.30am or Mama would be getting up. A quick glance at the clock on the kitchen wall told me that it was 3.53am. I wrapped my coat around me and sat on one of the porch chairs.

Was I ready for a serious relationship? Was I ready for an I-want-everything-with-someone relationship? What about the farm? My responsibilities?

About ten minutes must have gone by before I heard the porch door open. I thought it was Mama, but it was Noah who joined me on the porch.

"What's the matter?" he asked sitting next to me.

"Nothin'." I muttered.

"Tell me, please. I said something wrong, didn't I?"

"Noah, please." I said exasperatedly, clenching my eyes shut.

"Talk to me, Hallie." Noah insisted.

"Stop suffocating me!" I snapped, getting up and rushing down the porch steps.

"Hallie, don't run from me again!" Noah begged, but I had already left.

He made the right choice in not following me. I walked aimlessly down the country roads, as the sky got lighter and lighter.

I didn't mean to be so awful to him, I was just worried that it was going too fast and I was going to lose myself in this relationship. I loved Noah more than anything, but it still didn't help my head... the feelings of independence and wanting to work hard for the sake of my daddy's memory.

I had a little walk into town even though the shops were closed. It was so peaceful.

"Hallie? Is that you?" A voice called from across the street.

I looked across to see Dr White in her dressing gown by her front door. I wandered over and smiled warmly at her, "Hey, Dr White."

"What are you doing out so early?"

"I just needed to cleat my head." I answered.

"Well, I was going to call you this morning. I had your test results back late last night."