Destiny [Ai Mikaze x Reader] [FATE BOOK TWO]

Chapter 14 - Goodbye May Seem Forever

...

"Emergency cases found by the abandoned mine. No signs of life from the boy. Hurry, go, go!!"

...

"Look. Her leg is completely white. It isn't getting any blood circulation. Doctor... call the doctor!!"

...

"Are you sure that's the only way?"
"We don't have another choice."

...

"[F/N]..."

"[F/N]!"

I slowly opened my eyes. White ceiling greeted me. A familiar white ceiling, holding that same feeling of dread that it did six years ago.
I found myself in a hospital gown once again.
I let out a groan, slowly sitting up. I wasn't connected to a breathing machine this time, and my memories returned to me much faster. Those memories weren't anything encouraging.
It took me at least two minutes to realize that something was off.
I furrowed my eyebrows - I could feel my stomach getting in a huge knot. Looking in front of myself, I slowly, shakily lifted the blanket that was laid over me.
I wanted to scream, but no sound escaped my throat.
My right leg was...
... gone.

"[F-[F/N]! You're awake..." a yelp came from the door not far from me. I slowly looked up, as I suffered to even try to force a word out my mouth.
"... R-Reiji..." my voice came out shaking and confused. 
"Listen... don't panic." the brunette tried his best to smile at me. "The doctor... sorta... had to amputate your leg, b-but..."
"What...?" my voice broke.
"I-It's okay!! You'll get a robotic leg and it'll function just as well, so, um..."
".... W... What is... okay? My leg is... g-gone..." I muttered quietly in horror, looking at the small chunk that was left.
"... L-Look at the bright side though! You're... alive. You have your memories, and..."
"M-Memories...??" I raised my voice a bit, even though it was shaking. "What do those memories help...?? All of my brothers are dead, related and non-related as well...!!"
"... O-Otoya's not dead..." he mumbled quietly. For a second, I could only sniffle, before I looked up at him.
"... h... he's not?"
"N-No. He's in a coma."
"..."
"B-But he could wake at any second, really!!" he tried to sound energetic, although he looked like he was about to cry as well.
"... This is all my fault." I whispered, staring down in my lap.
"What...? No-"
"Stop denying it, Reiji! Eiichi wouldn't have done any of this if I'm not there! If I'm not there, none of this would have happened! You would all still live your lives happily! And n-now-- Eiji's dead! Eiichi's dead! Their father's dead! Ai almost died! Otoya's between life and death! You attempted to kill yourself! All because of me...!"
At the last part, Reiji grew silent. I was quick to realize what I've just said.
"... R-Reiji I... didn't mean to..."
"No. It's okay." he smiled sadly. "That was my choice of action, not yours. Besides... it was you who stopped me from doing it in the first place."
"..."
I looked back down in front of myself.
"I can't believe that we got here all because of stupid choices," I mumbled quietly. "... I'm just confused. It ended up that you didn't kill anybody. Your mistake was undone, s-so why would you...?"
"... Well, that's..."
For a long while, we were both silent. You could practically feel the tension in the air as nobody said a word.
"... I've done mistakes in the past that can't be undone."
I tilted my head at Reiji's sad look. He never really told me anything about his past. Before this whole case, he was always so happy, so I couldn't have imagined a sad past for him at all.
"... It was like it all happened again. Not only he looks exactly like he did, but I repeated the same action all because of my selfishness." he whispered weakly.
"... Reiji, what are you...?"
"... Have you ever thought about... who was the inspiration behind Ai's looks and voice?" he looked at me with a sad smile.
"..." I blinked. "... N-No... not really."
"... Well... he was called Aine. Aine Kisaragi. He looked and sounded exactly as Ai does. He was my very best friend..."
".... Reiji... you're talking in a past form..." I mumbled.
"I am," he muttered. "Because he's dead."
Once again, long silence. I felt a shiver run down my spine.
"He was such a nice guy. He was always there for me when I really needed it." he gulped loudly. "Too bad I wasn't there for him when he needed it more than anything."
I furrowed my eyebrows at the tear that just dropped in his palm.
"... I cared about my dumb career too much...! He needed me! He needed me and I didn't care! And the next day, I-!... I just go to work... as a freshly debuted idol... but Aine's not there. Aine's... not anywhere."
"... Reiji..."
"It was all my fault," he muttered quietly. "He killed himself because I didn't care."
"Reiji, don't say that...!" I bit my lips. "... j-just like you said earlier, it was his choice of action, not yours..."
"I could have stopped him if I'm there!" he snapped. "He called me several times! I should have known something was off but I ignored him...!"
"Reiji!" I cried out. "If I don't have the right to blame myself, you don't have the right either...!"
To that, he grew quiet again. Then, he sniffed loudly and wiped his tears.
"S-Sorry, [F/N]-chan." he smiled weakly. "I should be making you feel better instead of making you feel sorry for me."
"..." I stared at my leg again with a sigh. "I just wish this was all a nightmare... It really can't get any worse than this."
"... Heads up." Reiji said softly, his hand grabbing my chin and making me look at him. "... if it can't get any worse, it can only get better."
"..." I smiled sadly as his thumb rubbed a tear away. "Thanks, Reiji... but you have to cheer up then, too."
He chuckled sadly. "I'll... try."
For a while, he was staring at me, his hand cupping my cheek. I loudly cleared my throat.
"... R-Right." he frowned, ruffling my hair. "Sorry."
With that, he stood up and sighed deeply, stepping to the door.
"Um... rest well and be positive." he smiled sadly, almost bumping into someone else. "Oof! Gomen Gomen......... A-Ai-Ai."
I looked up at the new-found tension in the room.
"... Reiji." the cyanette muttered.
"... I'll just go." Reiji cleared his throat, quickly passing by Ai with a dark expression.
"..." Ai sighed while looking after him.
"... um..." I mumbled, making him turn to me.
"Rise and shine." he smiled at me. "I'm glad you're okay."
"... I-I wouldn't call this... okay, but..." I muttered awkwardly, staring at the chunk that was left from my leg. "... I-I guess."
"Don't be like that. You'll get a robotic replica and everything will be back to normal," he told me simply, plopping down on the chair beside me.
"Yeah but, can a robotic replica really function okay...?" I frowned.
"..."
"... Oh my god." I yelped in realization. "S-Sorry!!!"
Ai chuckled softly, ruffling my hair. "... how well am I functioning to you?" he asked teasingly.
"Y-You know I didn't mean it...!"
"That's not an answer."
".... Y-You function... okay."
"Okay?"
"A-Alright, fine, you're perfect!!" I jabbered, earning a giggle from him this time and a kiss on the cheek.
"G-Geez." I crossed my arms. 
"... what was up with Reiji? He didn't do anything... right?"
"Of course he didn't! You know he's not that type of guy!" I sighed.
"Right, right, of course he isn't." he rolled his eyes. "I was just making sure..."
"... what's the guitar for?" I tilted my head at the guitar case that he put beside my bed.
"... Ah! Yeah..." he cleared his throat, quickly unzipping the case and taking out the instrument itself.
"You can play the guitar?"
"... your... brother taught me." he looked down.
"... O-Oh."
"Anyway...! I, uh..."
"... Ai, you seem nervous, which is weird for you..." I jerked an eyebrow at him.
"... I wrote you a song," he mumbled, quickly running over the guitar to check if everything was okay. "I've been writing it for a... long time. Probably since the concert where all of... this started."
"... A-Ah... wait, you wrote me a song??" 
"... you just seemed down and I... n-nevermind, just... listen."
He took a deep breath and started strumming on the guitar.