How to choose the one

Waterfalls and volcanos

"Another party? It's only been five days since the last one?" I declare in a slight panic and if I'm being honest, disappointment. The last one did not go so well and as I knew before even going to my first ever college soirée; parties still weren't my thing.

Lexi looks at me with something that resembles sympathy but also contains a hint of a smirk and she comes to sit next to me on my bed. I'm glad I amuse her as I would hate to think it's pity. She bounces a little and as she does and a frown crosses her face;

"Your bed is super hard Ellis!" She shakes her head with a small giggle and shifts her weight so that she is facing me, her hand resting on my knee reassuringly.

"I know. I could tell that you didn't enjoy the last one. Usually the beginning of the college term is a bit packed with parties and events but it does get more sporadic as the year continues. I promise." She makes a little cross on her heart for good measure and I smile at her effort.

"Plus, a small part of your cheer duties is to represent the team at events too, put up a good appearance and all that. Plus you get to meet the new coach tonight. No one has yet."She continues and places both her hands firmly but in a kind gesture, on my shoulders.

"I will stay sober with you if that helps? I know you are not big on the party scene but this one, the annual opener, is important. It's the offical start to our year, all of the sport teams that we support plus boosters will be there." She smiles softly and removes her hands after giving my shoulder tips a soft squeeze in a sobering way, meant to affirm me, but I just end up feeling more pressure. She lets out a small sigh and stands up, retiring to the closet to finish her costume for tonight.

It's a theme this time, which makes everyone else seem thrilled and filled to the brim of their minds with ideas for costumes but it just makes me even more nervous. Mother Nature. How is that even a theme?

Lexi has decided that she will go as an element and has pulled together a whimsical blue flowing outfit, which consists of a long tulle skirt that flows with a small train as she moves, coupled with a blue crop that is covered in petal like layers of the same tulle.

It's simple yet stunning. How she whipped this up in a few hours is beyond me. She spies me staring at her in a dumbfounded and slightly jealous way and explains;

"From part of our winter wonderland routine last year for the end of year party." She spins the skirt around for full affect. It just makes me feel even more inadequate.

Great. Another party to not look forward to.

"What am I going to wear Lexi?" I whine and stand up, shoulders hunched, dragging my ass over to the closet at the pace of a snail.

"Anything you want? I have to run to meet up with my brother who is visiting, I'll have to meet you there, but feel free to use anything you find in my closet ok?" She nods and lifts her brows trying to be hopeful, she beams at me. With a small encouraging wink, she grabs her keys and heads out the door.

I absentmindedly flick through her side of the clothing, skimming my fingers along the soft fabrics her belongings hold. Her style is much more feminine than mine and I find myself pulling out item after item, holding them up in front of me in the mirror, pretending that I'm Lexi and wondering what it would be like to have her confidence.

After an hour of sifting through literally everything in the entire closet, I spy a small tub of costume parts, bits and pieces of discarded outfits from past performances I assume.

I throw the entire contents on to the floor in the middle of our room and spread it out. I find sequins, a long white silk skirt, fluorescent pink velvet and a lot of other random costume parts, including a long red feather boa.