pain and pacis // gawsten ddlb

-part 1

Awsten rushed down the sidewalk, his faded blue hair flopping with each stride. He was late. Very late. Hopefully Logan was in a good mood; Awsten was not wanting to get yelled at that night. He shivered in the cool autumn air as he walked the steps to their small house. With the turn of his key, Awsten stepped inside to the forgiving heat.

"You're home late," Logan tutted, appearing from the kitchen in front of Awsten.
"I'm sorry, I had a long shift, sir," Awsten looked down and gulped, playing with his fingers.
"Good boys don't make excuses."
Awsten nodded.
"What was that, pet?" Logan growled, grabbing Awsten's jaw harshly.
"I'm sorry, sir," Awsten quivered. "Won't happen again, sir."
Logan let go roughly. "That's what I thought. Get ready for bed. Now."
The small boy nodded feebly and began to walk to the closet. Before he could, Logan snatched Awsten's jaw again.
"And don't you fucking put on that disgusting fucking dress," Logan snapped.
"I won't, sir."

Awsten ran to the bathroom after grabbing some pajama pants and a baggy shirt. He would've slammed the door, but he knew he'd get chastised for it.

Awsten was scared, to put it bluntly. He was always scared. Scared that Logan would use his fists; It was common. Scared that Logan would leave him just like everyone else. He was dependent on Logan and he knew it, but Awsten couldn't get away. He knew that if Logan were to leave him, he'd die on the streets. Yeah, he had a job, but it didn't pay much.

Awsten left the bathroom and laid on he and Logan's bed.
"Hey," the brown-haired man greeted him.
"Hi, sir."
"Goodnight, pet."
"Goodnight, sir."
And Awsten fell asleep thinking about the life he dreamed of.

Awsten woke up early for his shift at the pizza place. He slipped on his uniform and hopped in the car. It started with a jolt and he was off. He jammed to the radio for a while before pulling into the small shop that smelled of pepperoni. He fumbled for his keys and opened the creaky door.
"Hey," Awsten grinned at his coworker.
"Sup, Aws?" The flamboyant girl held her hand out for a high five.
"Not much. I see you dyed your hair again, Lyss? Looks nice."
"Thanks," she laughed, twirling her bubblegum pink locks. "You need to redo yours," she continued.
"Logan won't let me. Says it makes me look like a twink."
"God, just dump him already, Aws! You deserve so much better!" She begged.
"Yeah, I know. Let's just start this stupid shift already. I can't work late again or Logan's gonna kill me."

The two best friends began preparing the shop. It never got busy, so only two people worked a shift at a time. The company was looking for a third worker to do some more shifts.
"Awsten?"
"Yeah?" He replied, refilling the bins of cheese.
"Is everything okay at home?"
Awsten stared ahead of him. He could totally tell Alyssa anything. But was it worth it? Logan hadn't actually rendered him immobile. He was probably fine.
"Yeah," he replied, moving onto refilling the sausage bin.
"You sure?" She replied, her button nose twitching as she filled a soda for herself.
"Yep," Awsten laughed, grabbed her drink, and took a sip from it.
"Hey!"

The two "fought" for a while until they decided that they really needed to get working. Sure enough, at 11, the door swung open and a young man strolled in. Lyss blew a bubble and glanced at Awsten, signaling for him to tend to the customer. He resentfully walked to the counter.

"Welcome to Papa's Pizza, sir! I'm Awsten, how can I help you today, sir?"
"Hi. Are you guys still hiring?" The man questioned, digging his hand into his denim jacket pockets.
Awsten looked into his piercing, icy eyes.
"Oh, yeah, um, right here, I mean- one second, sir," He continued, blushing and running to the back to get a form.
He came back and gave it to the brunette.
"Is that all for you today, sir?"
"Yeah, thanks."
The man sat at one of the tables in the corner and began filling out the application. Awsten went into the back.

"Possible new worker," he informed Lyss.
"Aw, I like it, just you and me," she frowned, kicking her converse-clad feet.
"Me too." Awsten continued, "so, do you still like being a 'real adult?'"
"It feels no different," the freshly-22-year-old responded.
"That'll change soon," Awsten laughed. Sure, he was in his mid-twenties, but they were still close as can be.
After about five minutes, the bell in the front rang.
"Your turn," Awsten smirked.

The pink-haired girl came back holding the resumé.
"He was kinda cute!" She squeaked. "His name's Geoff. I'm sending it to the manager."
"No!" Awsten protested before he could stop himself.
"Why?"
"No reason!"
Awsten was in trouble. He knew that he would fall for Geoff. He had shaggy brown hair and a sharp jawline. His blue eyes reminded Awsten of an avalanche or something chilly. And yet they held warmth. A ring dangled from the side of his nose.
"Aws... you're not telling me something..." Alyssa folded her arms.
"No I'm not- er- yes I am- uh- you know what I mean!"
"Okay..."
"Come on, Just please don't!" Awsten pleaded.
"You probably won't even get assigned a shift with him!"
"Still, just don't!"
Lyss didn't reply.

The two worked their shift until the next batch of workers came in. Awsten climbed into his rusty car after bidding Lyss adieu. He contemplated driving to Alyssa's or something, but then he decided to just face Logan back at home. It didn't even feel like home anymore.
"Good afternoon, sir," Awsten grumbled as he placed his backpack on the kitchen counter.
"You weren't late today."
"I wasn't, sir."
Awsten glanced at the clock. 4:30 p.m: right on time.
"Get dressed. We're going out for dinner."
"Yes, sir."
Awsten trudged down the hallway and into his closet. He walked over to his corner and pulled off his pile of normal clothing to reveal a multitude of skirts and other "slutty" things. He stared at them sadly. Logan would kill him if he caught him wearing them. He hated anything slightly feminine. Instead, he opted for the tightest black skinny jeans imaginable and an oversized sweater.
"I'm ready, sir," Awsten announced as he shoved his phone into his pocket.

The two shared a dinner at a fancy restaurant. Awsten was quiet, as per usual. And then he got a phone call.
"Hello?"
"Hi, Awsten. Sorry for the bad timing. Your Friday shift is going to be with a new worker instead of Alyssa."
Awsten's heart dropped. "What's their name, sir?"
"Geoff. Geoff Wigington."
"Oh, okay. Thanks. Good night, sir."
"Night."

"What's wrong?"
"Nothing, sir," Awsten remarked as he tried to shove his phone in his pocket.
"What do you say after I pay for your dinner?" Logan growled.
"Thank you, sir."
"Good boy. Now let's go home."
"Thank you, sir. Yes, sir."