pain and pacis // gawsten ddlb

-part 14

Awsten woke up to an empty space next to him. A sweet smell wafted through the house as Awsten rose from bed. He trudged to the kitchen and saw Geoff at the stove, fixing something up. He ran and embraced him from behind.

"God, you scared me!" Geoff laughed.
Awsten giggled and left kisses along his boyfriend's face. "Whatcha makin'?"
"Just breakfast."
"It smells so good!"
"I'm glad, Aws."
Awsten leaned over Geoff's shoulder to get a better look at the creation.
"What the fuck, Geoff, are those blue?"
"Of course they are!" Geoff chuckled as he flipped a colored pancake.
"Oh god," Awsten snorted. "Why?"
"Because I like making you laugh."
"Awwww!"
"And I thought it would be funny if they matched your hair."
"Well, I mean, you got it pretty down-pat."
"Thanks." Geoff handed him a plate. "Now tell me how they taste."
Awsten shoveled it into his mouth.
"Mmm!"
Geoff ruffled Awsten's hair. "Glad you like them. Now do you want a bottle or cup?"
"Bottle, please."

The rest of the day went smoothly. They went to the mall and picked out some dresses and stockings. When they returned home, the news was on.

"Elections for Survival the John the Killer are a year away and couples have began parting ways."
Awsten stopped in his tracks.
"Oh my God, I forgot!"
"What?" Geoff inquired, looking at the TV.
"There's this game... it's fucking awful, oh my god..."
"What is it?" Geoff begged.
"Every 20 years, 30 couples are put into some arena-type thing... you heard of The Hunger Games?"
"...yeah?"
"Well it's basically like that except it's one guy after a bunch of couples. I don't know that much about it but it's terrifying. I'd kill myself if I got elected."
"Do you think we will?"
"I hope not... they know everything about everyone. It's a statewide thing."
"Well can we move?"
"It's complicated, and I don't think we're financially stable enough."
"Well how do we get out?"
"We... break up."
"Not happening," Geoff insisted.
"Yeah, I know."
"Well," Geoff continued, "it's a year away. We have time to prepare."
"True," Awsten sighed.
"Do you wanna try on your pretty princess things?"
Awsten nodded and took his new clothes into the bathroom.

Minutes later, Awsten emerged wearing a frilly pink-and-white dress and stockings to match. Geoff's jaw dropped.
"Baby, you look so pretty!"
Awsten blushed and ran into his arms.
"Did you try your other one on yet?"
The younger shook his head and sprinted back to the bathroom.
The next one had even more ruffles and sparkles. It was a soft pink. Awsten opened the door hesitantly.
"You are so cute that I just wanna squeeze you. Come here, sweetie."
Awsten obliged and put his head into Geoff's chest, scrunching up his nose in embarrassment.
"I'm sorry, this is so stupid!" He cried.
Geoff moved so that Awsten's head wasn't laying on him and that he could see him.
"What makes you say that, bub?"
"Because I bet I just look so dumb and ridiculous to you!"
"No you don't!" Geoff insisted. "I love you, whether it be little you or big you! You're still Awsten! You look so pretty in a dress, you look so pretty without one!"
"You really think so? Like, really?"
"Of course I do. If you feel pretty in it then I love it. Hell, I love it even if you don't."
"A-are you sure?"
"One hundred percent. I told you I've done this all before."
"But that was- that was a girl," Awsten sniffled. "I'm just a stupid boy in a dress."
"Don't even think that. Ever. You're my little princess and I love you for you."
"Okay... I love you."
"I love you loads more. Now let's go color, okay, cutie?"
Geoff held his hand out. Awsten took it and the two made their way to the living room.

Awsten pulled out a coloring book from the drawer and his box of crayons.
"Okay. How about you color me a... princess?"
"Of course I will, daddy!"
"Thank you, doll."
"Daddy, can I have some crackers? And my bottle?" Awsten requested.
"Of course, princess."
Geoff returned minutes later with the requested items.
"Tank chuuuuu," the boy giggled.
"Aw, how polite."

Geoff sat next to Awsten and watched him color. He pointed to the word "Cinderella" in the corner.
"What's that spell, Bub?"
"C-cind... Cinderella!"
Geoff beamed. "Good job!"
Awsten smiled and picked up a crayon.
"What color is that?"
Awsten pouted as he stared at the wax, his blue hair falling to his eyes.
"Geen!"
"Close, baby."
"Yewwow!"
"You're so smart!" Geoff praised him.
He moved Awsten's hair behind his ears. "And what color is that?"
"Blue! I know that cuz it's like a bluebewwy!"
"You sure do! Who's my smart baby?"
Awsten's face lit up.
"Oh, I know that one! It's me, daddy!"
Geoff booped the boy's nose. "It sure is, baby boy!"
"Yaaaaay!"

Awsten continued to color for a while until he finished his picture. Geoff gasped when Awsten showed it to him.
"Oh my god, bub! How pretty! Let's put that on the fridge!"
Awsten's eyes widened.
"Really?"
"Of course!"
"I love chuuuu!"
Geoff ruffled the boy's hair as he snatched the drawing and a magnet. He placed it front and center after having Awsten sign it, who blushed after seeing it displayed.
"Let's go out for dinner!" Geoff suggested.
Awsten frowned.
"Daddy, I look weird! Can't go outside!"
"Of course you can, princess. If you feel weird, just change."
The boy pouted.
"You want my clothes, don't you, bub?"
Awsten simpered.
"Come here."

Awsten scrambled up and followed Geoff to their room, where he got an oversized hoodie of his boyfriend's. He slipped it over his head and grinned as it fell to his knees. Awsten paired it with jeans, and sniffed it when Geoff wasn't looking. Smelled nice. Smelled like Geoff.
"Ready?" The brunette inquired.
"Yup!"

The two headed to the restaurant. They were seated quickly. The place was lit up by a gorgeous string of lights that dangled from the ceiling, and a colossal Christmas tree stood boldly in the middle. A smell of scrumptious spices permeated through the restaurant.
"This is so fancy!" Awsten marveled.
"Well, only the best for you."
"Aw... thank you!"

Soon, their waitress came and they placed their orders.
"So what're the plans for tonight?" Geoff inquired.
"Not sure, do we ever actually have plans?"
Geoff shrugged. "I guess not. I just didn't know if you had anything in mind."
Awsten smiled and hid his face. "No, I don't."
"Wait, what?" Geoff laughed.
"Oh god, it's nothing. I just love you so much."
"I love you more."
"But like," Awsten bit his lip, "do you actually, like, love me-love me or are you just pitying me?"
Geoff's brow furrowed. "What makes you ask?"
"I don't know, I feel bad if you're just putting up with me."
"Of course I love you. Like, I would die for you in a heartbeat."
The younger boy blushed.
"Are you sure I'm not moving this too fast? Like, we've, y'know, I don't wanna say it in the restaurant but you get the gist, like 5 times. And I live with you and you spoil me. We've known each other for like 3 months. Are you really, REALLY sure that this is what you want? I feel like I'm some sort of parasite just feeding or some shit."
Geoff's face fell.
"Well we don't have to live like that if you don't want... you could have told me."
"No! Don't get me wrong!" Awsten insisted. "I just don't want you to be uncomfortable. That's all."
"I appreciate that, Aws. I really do. I'm fine the way we are."
"Okay, good. Because I am too."