I...killed our mother... so I don't blame you for hating me...I'm also the reason why father had left us...so I don't blame you for ignoring me...But...I wished you would have loved me...just for one time...just once...even if it means my death. If...
"My sleepy baby girl is so beautiful..." A woman's voice rings through my ears as I slept in peaceful darkness and felt the warmth of her hands touching my cheek. *Slap!. The warm hand disappears and is replaced with a stinging pain, running through my cheek when I heard a high pitched sound of a hand hitting firmly against it, forcing me to open my eyes from the shock.
"Get up, fat b*tch!" My brother screams at me as he punched me in the stomach while I was trying to sit up. I control my voice from screaming, wrapping my arms around my abdomen from the agony of the impact. I yelp from the action of my brother pulling my long hair. He whispered angrily against my ears, "Why are you always like this?" before pushing me away and storming out of my room. I closed my eyes to prevent tears from falling and softly said, "Sorry, Jin...". The digital clock, standing on my bedside table, displayed the time in a milky light: 6:30 am. 'Well, I need to get up before my brothers get mad, even though they're always angry with me all the time.'
I have 7 brothers, Jin, who 'woke' me up, Yoongi, Hoseok, Namjoon, Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook. They have debuted approximately 2 years ago as 'BTS' through 'Big Hit Entertainment' in 2013 and I've always been proud of them, while I watch every concert, MV and shows of theirs. I've also seen their hard work even before debut, though, ever since I was born, they have hated me constantly, mostly because I was the reason for the death of our mother, and father left us behind with his house and some savings for another woman not too long ago, which caused more conflict between me and my brothers. I've tried bonding with them many times before, however, I had given up a long time ago and started to act like a stranger towards them, but I secretly continued to observe them as a thrilled sister, and it's my only way of getting to know them better...
I'm just started high school this year while Jungkook is a year above and Jimin as well as Taehyung are two years above, though they sometimes miss school from idol duties. The others attend university online since they are getting busier with their daily schedules as well. I made my way to the bathroom and saw the red print on my cheek; it continued to sting when I touched it. I finished my daily morning routine and used a small amount of concealer to hide the mark on my face. After putting on my uniform, I went downstairs to see my brothers all dressed up. 'Looks like they are going out all day for an event...Oh I remember! They're doing a live stage tonight'.
"Hey whore! What took you so long?!" Namjoon exclaimed. He strikes a kick at my right shin, bringing me down on my left knee, as I embrace the pain. He pulls my hair, forcing me to look up at his face, his eyes were of a dark chocolate colour as he gives me an intense, still look, "We're out all day. I expect you to finish all the tasks given to you... or else!" He pulls harder on my hair before releasing. "Come on, boys. Let's not waste anymore time with this piece of s*it". They leave through the door, one by one getting a chance to either kick or hit me. I stayed on the cold, hard ground, looking up at the blurry ceiling, "Why... me?...". After an eternity, I finally got up and reached for my school bag sitting on the couch, before leaving for school.
It takes about 15 mins to walk to school, which I don't really mind, and it's not like I'll get any help from my brothers, even though they drive to school. I don't have many friends at school, mainly because Jungkook humiliated me on the first day and he is famous, so no one would support a nobody like me. My school life was already being ruined by my brothers so I try hard in all my subjects, which I'm proud of since I'm always first in all classes, however, I do get bullied often, not only by my brothers, but my classmates as well. I arrived at the gate of my school and can already feel the uncomfortable gazes of everyone around me. My head was kept low while my eyes stayed on the ground as I proceeded to my first class, Drama. I accidentally bumped into someone's shoulder, or more like... they purposely collided with me, "Hey! Watch it slut!". I bow apologetically, "sorry..." before briskly walking away. The hallway gets so quiet and overflows with loud whispers when I enter, it's exhausting and stressful. I'm the first to arrive in class and sat in my spot, in the corner at the very back. As usual, my desk is graffitied on with very disturbing messages, but I choose to always ignore it and wiped it off using wet-wipes. Students start flooding the classroom and sit in their seats before the teacher appeared.
"Good Morning Class! Today each of you will stand in front of the class and act out the scene I give you. Everyone gets a different scenario but with the same theme. Today's theme is... Misery! The first to make the whole class cry will receive a possible opportunity to act in an upcoming movie!" I receive my script and scan through it. My scene was pretty much equivalent to my life, so I think it'll go well. When my name was called out, I stood up and walked towards the front of the class, nearly tripping over someone's purposely stuck out foot. "And...start!" the teacher gestured. My eyes focused on the crowd in front of me as tears started forming across the surface of my eyes.
"Why do you do this to me?!" I screamed, frightening some students. "Do you know what I have been through?! You don't understand the agony and emotions you have caused within me! No... Of course you wouldn't!" I slam my script on the floor, causing a loud bang to echo through the room. "You made my life miserable to the point where I can't figure out what's real or not!!" I look up as I caught my breath before looking back at my class with tears streaming down my cheeks, like mini waterfalls. My brothers came into vision, " *sob I love you so much... I cherish every moment with you, even the painful ones because I know it can't get any better than this... I sacrifice so much for you... I try to make you happy by listening to you..." I say sweetly in pain, "...but it's not enough for you. It feels as if you want me gone... but if that's what you want... I'll do it..." I just finished the sentence before hearing someone shout out, "Well, go die then, motherf*cker". My hands clenched into fists since I know that voice too well. My eyes slowly followed the sound of the individual and my brows furrowed... it was...
