I...killed our mother... so I don't blame you for hating me...I'm also the reason why father had left us...so I don't blame you for ignoring me...But...I wished you would have loved me...just for one time...just once...even if it means my death. If...
We stood in our positions and slightly nodded our heads to the DJ as he cued the music. (Song/Choreography: Say You Won't Let Go - James Arthur / May J Lee & Bongyoung Park Choreography)
Her slim arms, small waist, the lightness of her body... I loved it all. As we danced closely together, I reminisced the first day of school as I witnessed Jungkook shaming Y/N in the school hallway. She seemed so delicate and helpless so I decided to support her and surprisingly, ever since that moment, I felt warm and fuzzy when I'm with her, and... I don't know why. My eyes made contact with BTS's as they watched us from the side, hidden behind the auditorium curtains. They were giving me annoyed expressions while I could only return their gaze with a blank stare... I didn't like them...they always emitted a bad vibe which made me feel uneasy, especially when I'm with Y/N, but I don't know why and what's more strange is that... Y/N doesn't mind them, no matter what they do to her... it's as if she thought... she deserved such treatment. When the music ended, we were greeted with many cheers and claps as we bowed to the audience. I stared into Y/N's eyes as we both grinned at each other and high-fived.
"Do you still want to look around?" The festival was nearly ending, meaning most of us could leave now. "Nah...I think I'll head home." Y/N was smiling brightly, however, her eyes weren't; they looked tired and dull. She waved goodbye before turning her back as she left. I instantly pulled on her wrist to prevent her from walking away. "What's wrong, Hwanwoong?" My lips quivered while I gazed at her surprised expression as I tried to find the right words to say. "U-uhh... I-I'll walk you home!" At first she rejected my offer but finally agreed when I 'puppy-eyed' her. 'Hehe, her reactions are always so cute.' The sunset provided the sky with a soft orange-pink glow while we walked side by side together in total silence, but it wasn't awkward... It felt romantic, at least that's what I thought. My hand naturally entwined with Y/N's, causing her to jump a little, "Hwanwoong, are you alright? You're acting weird." Her sunlit eyes were filled with concern, but I looked at her with deep affection, "Hey Y/N, I think I lik-" *beep!*beep!*
Suddenly, a car pulled up right next to us and Jimin came charging out. He immediately hooked onto Y/N's free hand and pulled her out of my reach, forcing her into the car. "Hey!! What are you doing with Y/N?!" He looked at me with fierce eyes as he raged, "None of your damn business!" Before I could run to him, the car was already long gone. I was really confused, 'Y/N...Just what connection do you have with BTS?' I stood still as I gazed down the road where the car had just gone through.
Y/N POV
When I was forced into the car, Namjoon seized my wrists as he began questioning me, "What is your deal with him?" I didn't know what to say but the longer I stayed silent the tighter Namjoon's grip got on my wrist, "A-are you talking about Hwanwoong?" The moment my croaky voice spoke, my face promptly shifted left while my cheek felt a burning pain, "Who else would we be f*cking talking about?" Hoseok exclaimed after he slapped me hard. "H-he's just a friend." Yoongi snickered, "Tsk! If he was just a 'friend', then why were you dancing and holding hands with him?" Before I could speak, Jungkook exclaimed, "Cause she's a f*cking slut hyung!" They laughed in unison while I hung my head low. "Listen, b*tch, we had given you rules to obey and you're already breaking them," Taehyung mentioned, "Looks like we're going to have to remind you.". "Hey guys~could you wait until we get home? I'm trying to concentrate on driving!" Jin shouted from the driver's seat.
...
After taking a shower, I gazed at my gruesome reflection in the mirror; the scars... the bruises...the fresh wounds...Each were excruciatingly painful to touch. My body felt numb but I convinced myself, 'This is what I deserved...' *buzz*buzz* Unexpectedly, my phone trembled on the marble countertop, displaying a message from Hwanwoong, "Hey Y/N! I hope you didn't forget but tomorrow's your birthday! And it's the weekend so do you want to hang out with me and we can celebrate your birthday together tomorrow?" I checked the calendar on my phone and tomorrow, truly was my birthday! And sadly... my mother's death anniversary. 'Ah...I forgot...My brothers are visiting mother's grave tomorrow.' They've never taken me to see mother before since I'm the reason for the cause of her death but now that I'm old enough... I'll be going myself tomorrow. I responded back, "Sorry Hwanwoong, I'm busy with other events tomorrow but thank you anyways! Don't worry, I still remember I need to treat you to Korean BBQ!"
Sleep overtook me as I thought of mother. I don't remember what she looked like since I have only been out for a few hours before she died, but I can vaguely recognised the voice that resonated within my mind. "...my beautiful child...your brothers can't wait to see you...*sigh* if only your father was too..." The world around me started spinning as I felt my body falling, causing me to jolt up instantly on my bed. *gasp!* ...Father? Did father not accept me as his daughter?
... *bang!*bang!* "Hey b*tch! How long are you planning to stay in bed for?" Jin's words pierced through the barrier separating us as the door vibrated violently from the banging impact, "I-I'll be out soon!" then I realised something, 'Oh! my voice is back!' I hurried out of bed even though I only had to see my brothers out the door. I lightly brushed my bed hair and replaced my pyjamas with simple, casual clothing before going downstairs. Once they left, I zoomed to my bedroom to change into my funeral outfit. I wore a black hat with a short veil that covered my face so that my brothers couldn't recognise me easily.
On my way to the cemetery, I bought a bouquet of fresh lilies to give mother. When I arrived, it took a while to find her grave since I've never been to it before, until I saw my brothers surrounding a particular gravestone. I hid behind a tree as I observed them from afar. *gasp* What I saw before me took me by shock as this was one of the most rarest moments I have ever caught of my brothers. They were all dressed in black with their heads cast downwards. Jin kneeled in front of the grave as he gently laid their bouquet of flowers against it. They were all crying in grief and their faces overflowed with undying pain. The more I looked at them, the more guilty I became, 'I never realised I have... caused them so much despair...'
