I...killed our mother... so I don't blame you for hating me...I'm also the reason why father had left us...so I don't blame you for ignoring me...But...I wished you would have loved me...just for one time...just once...even if it means my death. If...
(Minor mature scenes ahead. Proceed at your own risk.)
We sat at a nearby empty park.
Silent.
Calm.
Peaceful.
"Hey Y/N," Hwanwoong said, "Wanna dance?"
My eyes shot wide open, "Here?". He nodded. "B-but I haven't danced in ages...". He laughed, "That doesn't matter, come..." He led me onto the wide empty ground before pulling out his phone and a melody began playing, "You remember this song right?" (Song/Choreography: Say You Won't Let Go - James Arthur / May J Lee & Bongyoung Park Choreography)
I smiled, "Of course!" Blasting his phone at a decent volume, he placed his phone back into his pocket before wrapping his arms around me.
I was surprised at how natural the dance came to me even though I haven't practised in forever. At times we locked eyes, at times we came really close to each other and at times I made mistakes as we laughed in euphoria, all the way until the song ended. I felt comfortable, just like I had in the past, "Hey Hwanwoong," I kept my eyes on him as he returned my gaze, "Thanks for always being such a good friend."
As I said that, I felt Hwanwoong's cheerful atmosphere drop to lower temperatures, "N-no problem, I'm happy to be always there for you." It was getting late and dinner was only a few hours away, "We should get going Hwanwoong." He nodded before we strolled out the park. The walk was silent again but I didn't mind it; being in his presence was euphoric enough. "Y/N, do you want anything to drink? You should stay for a bit more." Hwanwoong suggested. "Hmm...Okay then! Just for a bit though."
...
I settled on the couch in the living room while Hwanwoong prepared the hot chocolate before bringing it out. "So how is home?" He suddenly asked. "Oh! It's good! I'm always having so much fun!" The words naturally rolled off my tongue as I thought of my brothers, but Hwanwoong looked more annoyed, "Fun? You sure they aren't scheming anything dangerous against you?".
My brows raised from the surprise of his deep sulky tone, "No way! They'd never do such a thing! Besides we spent the entire night binge watching drama." I laughed at the thought, "You should've seen their faces! It was so hilari-" *bang!* Hwanwoong forced his cup on the coffee table as his head hung between his arms, "H-hwanwoong? Are you okay?" Silence.
"Then...stay with me tonight. We could binge watch drama together too." His request genuinely startled me, "U-uh...B-but, I can't. My brothers are waiti-" He suddenly grabbed onto my shoulders, "Why is it always them Y/N?!" I froze from shock, '...huh?'. "Why do you care so much for them?! Even in high school! When they bullied you, you didn't mind as well!".
My eyes locked into his, "W-well, they're my brot-". He shouted, "I know!! But I've tried so hard to surpass them and yet you still look up to them!!".
"S-sorry, I...I..." I went speechless. His head dangled between his arms again, "... Y/N, I love you." He repeated the same phrase, "...I love you...I love you..." and I sat in shock, "H-hwanwoong, I told you...I only see you as my...best friend." His eyes were coated with pain, "I thought I did too. And when you disappeared, I thought it was the end but now that you're back, I..."
(In all seriousness, if you're uncomfortable with the even the slightest mention with mature scenes, please do not read any further!♥ ♥ ♥)
I thought he had calmed down but, "...I can't give up on you.". He settled his gaze on me, his eyes overwhelmed with fierce passion and he... forced his lips onto mine, "Mmm!", catching me by surprise before viciously pushing me down the couch. His hands roamed around my clothes, wandering aimlessly and uncontrollably.
I struggled to push him away but his strength pinned me in place, 'Damn it! He's gotten stronger!'. Momentarily releasing my lips, I seized the opportunity to shout, "Hwanwoong! Stop it! Get off of m- Mmm!" but he crashed his lips back onto mine, forcing them to part as he thrusted his tongue through the opening. My eyes began to blur from the tears forming along the rims of my eyes. 'This isn't like him! I don't like this!'.
He parted from my lips and began travelling down my neck, "...I love you Y/N.", whispering sweet nothings along the way with his ragged breathing. "Stop it! Seriously!" I commanded. The tears began to trail down the corners of my eyes. Sensing my sobs, Hwanwoong lifted his head to look at me, "Why are you crying Y/N?".
When I thought I would never feel so much resentment for Hwanwoong, I did and glared at him, "Get off of me this instance! Otherwise I'll actually hate you!" My words triggered him detrimentally as his eyes narrowed in agony, "Why? Y/N, Why? I've treated you so kindly for you to fall for me and yet why not me?". I felt him shift in position, "*gasp!* No!!".
His cold hand went through my sweater, caressing my bare stomach. "I want to make you mine.", He began to trail upwards. "No..." Yielding all my strength, I broke free from his grip and forcefully swung my hand at his face, vigorously slapping his cheek as he stopped from the shock, "I hate you! I hate you so much!!!" It was my chance to escape as I collected my belongings and bolted out the door.
The tears kept dripping and still didn't stop when I reached home as I forced myself through the door. My back slid down against the door as I sobbed. "Y/N! You're hom- What's wrong?!" Jimin, who had been sitting on the couch, joyfully welcomed me as he heard the door but soon fell to his knees after running towards my weak figure. "*sniff* Jimin..."
I unconsciously clung to his chest as I wept which startled him, before he began to comfort me, "Everything's alright Y/N. I'm here." He stroked my hair, rubbed my back, and laid his cheek on my head until I had finally calmed down. "Jimin~What are you doi- Y/N?!" Hoseok ran over to me as he saw my shattered state, "What hap-" He paused before completing his question and I knew Jimin had prevented him from finishing it.
I released my grip on Jimin, apologising to him for ruining his hoodie and suddenly grabbing onto him plus Hoseok for letting him worry, "No Y/N, it's fine." I weakly smiled at them, "I'll go wash up...I'm going to bed early today so continue dinner without me." I briskly left them, worried and confused, and entered my room.
Not bothered to clean up or take off my clothes, I jumped into bed, forgetting the freezing temperatures or the ready-to- go heater as my focus remained on today's events. My eyes fixated on the metal pressing against my wrist while it jingled. My first ever real friend; my best friend had...
'Was it my fault for not thinking of him in such a way?' But yet, I felt like puking. The force of his touches and kisses still lingered. My hand caressed my lips and the tears resumed its trail along my face, 'That was...my first kiss.'
