Should I call you a cab?

Chapter thirteen

Vienna's daily alarm rang. She crawled in bed and reached her phone to turn it off, not knowing precisely where to head or even what day was she waking up to. So she checked the time, Sunday 7 am. Sunday, Sunday morning. She was home, in bed. Confused, she stretched and felt a sharp pain on her shoulders, running like light bold to the bottom of her back. So she remembered. "The date, the drinks, I got wasted, we came back, he... he kissed my neck." She touched, with the tips of her fingers, her cheeks, her jawline, remembering "I showered"  Vienna smelled her hair. Smelled like strawberry shampoo. "The floor, I laid on the floor?... the dream" The wound on chest started itching again. Her back felt terrible, and her heart pinched a bit, seeing herself crying in Gale arms. In Gaston arms. "Gaston!! The audition".  Vienna grabbed her night gaun and hurried out of the room. Full silence. Gaston was there, on the couch, hair looked wet after shower, watching TV on almost mute volume, very focused. She got her night gaun closed, crossing her arms on her chest and sat next to him as quiet. He didn't say a word, and she didn't knew what to say either. They stood like that, just watching the morning news for a few minutes, until the commercials started and Gaston fully muted the TV.

-I didn't meant to wake you up, sorry -He mumbled, softly. Would't look straight at her, so she knew something was wrong.

-You didn't, I forgot turning off my week day alarm yesterday. -Gaston just nodded and stood up, taking his coffee mug to the kitchen - You didn't...

-Miss my casting call? -He interrupted- No, I have to be there at 10.- He said from the other side of the high counter.

-Oh, great... -Vienna sighed relieved, and just sat there, feeling upset while Gaston washed his breakfast mug in the kitchen. She knew she did something wrong, or at least knew he was some kind of mad with her, but she didn't know how to talk to him about it. How to get close. She was new on this "having a brother" situation. So she took a deep breath and tried her best, measuring her words carefully- Hey, about list night...

-Last night? He left over an hour ago Vienna -Gaston chuckled selflessly, clearly upset- So no last night.

-What did he say?, w-what did you tell him? -She turned around, over the couch back, towards the kitchen, genuinely concerned.

-He was worried, he was confused. Hurt. -Gaston shrug his shoulders- I don't know Vienna, there wasn't much to say. You saw him and started crying desperately, the guy was at sixes and sevens.

-Did you... did you tell him? -Vienna spoke on a tiny, little, scared of the answer voice.

-Tell him what Vienna? The fact that you are a mess and he should try to understand even though you don't let people help you? -Low blow, Vienna didn't like that, she was convinced she wasn't like that, he was exaggerating. Gaston turned around facing her from the other side of the counter.- I told him the truth, sister -Vienna's heart skipped a beat- I told him you are a wreck, a mess who won't let him pick up the pieces. Even If he tried, you know what he said? He said he was sorry, he apologized for something he didn't even do! And then he actually asked me to tell you that he was not here, that he left even before you could start your tantrum. He said that you were wasted, that you wouldn't remember it -Gaston laughed with sarcasm about that idea- Like you cared, like you even care about him. -His teeth were grinding.

-I am no wreck. And I do care! I had a bad night, bad dream, whatever! -Vienna snorted, offended- That's all, nothing of your business, so... I mean, I'm sorry I woke you up. I'm sorry you had to have that conversation, but what I do it's none of your business Gaston. -Her voice got higher as she spoke, exasperated.

-Oh no, do not worry -Gaston got back to the living room sarcastically gesturing to her- None of my business. Sure. What's the big deal about it? You where just crying, wasted over a random hook up I never met. Because you thought my brother might be around. That's just it.- Vienna stood up scuffing, befuddled, annoyed, eyes like plates.

-Wait a minute, you were the one that pushed me into that date! I am not trying to replace anybody! You told me to go out, and now you're offended? Why on earth are you lecturing me about who I take home? -Vienna raised her voice at Gaston facing him, but he didn't take a step back.

-I am not! I am trying to understand you Vienna, Oh my god! -Gaston faced her, being so confident, she had to take her energy a step back. He talked very expressively, emphasizing every word- I am trying to understand how the hell do you pretend to overcame this if you don't let people help you. If you don't open up Vienna! You pushed everyone, every-single-person there was to push. Me, your mum, you have no friends Vienna! I know what you think. I know you think I'm so mature, I've grown so much, "How does he do it?, losing his mum, losing his brother" I just do, Vienna! 'Cause I have no other choice! I go to therapy, I take my meds! -his voice cracked a bit, Vienna could feel his suffering under the impenetrable mask- Let's see what do you do, shall we? -Gaston opened the curtains with a quick slide letting the sun in. He was enraged, moving around the whole place- You go to the same work office, with the same coffee mug and same boss, and then? You take the same subway as everyday to come home to the same bed, with the same sheets he used to sleep in. -Vienna's eyes were getting watery, but her throat was closed, tied on a knot, so she couldn't say a world. 

Gaston picked up one of bookshelf picture frames. Bruno's graduation photo, showing it to her- You act and pretend to live life like this never happened Vienna -his voice turned softer, frustrated, while showing her the picture with both hands- You pretend like he's here, and when you realize he's not, you crash. Like you did this morning! But it did. It happened Vienna! -Gaston threw the picture against the wall, smashing the glass. terribly frustrated. The noise was sharp, violent. Vienna closed her eyes tightly, losing a few tears, hugging her knees with both arms- He's dead! He's not coming back, no matter how much you try to convince yourself! You don't understand it. You don't want to understand it, because as long as you can get someone else to keep you warm and distracted you pretend you're okey! And you are not, hear me out Vienna -he paused and kneeling in front of her placed both his hands on Vienna's knees, looking at her straight into her eyes- You are not okey, Vienna. Stop pretending this is okey. He is not coming back. -Gaston whispered. Almost begging her, feeling hopeless. Vienna couldn't keep the tears from rolling down. Gaston hugged her tightly, with both knees still on the floor. They both cried. Together. For Bruno, for themselves.